Abel to Yzerman

Abel to Yzerman

You Are All Losers

10/19/2007 at 12:33am EDT

If you’re joining me to stay up for this pivotal October matchup, you have issues. You need to look yourselves in the mirror and determine just what’s important to you in life. My god. You’re up? You’re all pathetic.

Whatever. Crack ‘em if you got ‘em, it’s a late night West Coast live blog courtesy of Gary Leonore Bettman.

2240: What the HELL is a Dive fan transvestite doing in San Jose? Oh..that’s Ricci. My bad.

2244: Cool. Wings wait 4 minutes real time, 90 seconds game time, to take their first penalty. Outstanding.

2253: Reaction. I believe Mike Grier scored first in Game 1 last year didn’t he? Reaction. I looked up and saw Brett Lebda with the puck and thought I saw Dino Ciccarelli. I looked up again and saw Andres Lilja with the puck and threw up in my mouth.

2258: I think I told you guys this before. Dallas Drake beat the snot out of my college roommate in a Marquette bar in 1988. I also think he just got drilled. He was holding his face on the bench, but looking at the replay it looked like a shoulder.

2301: You frigging bastard Dave. One minute after you make a comment about only one penalty called halfway through the first, one of Gary’s minions rectifies it. Nice job Dave.

2305
: I swear to sweet baby Jesus I don’t think I’ve watched a single minute of Wing hockey the last four days that didn’t feature Detroit on the penalty kill.

2312
: Gary you little frigging toad. When you have Wing fans publicly proclaiming their wishes that one of their own players takes a puck in the nuts, you know the scheduling sucks. That’s what happens Gary. It’s chaos.

It’s time for Intermission Playhouse!!

Red Sox are up 4-1 so I’m watching tonite’s episode of The Office, because Dwight Shroot is my new favorite tv character, taking over for Newman and before him; Speed Racer. Before I turn it on, here’s some A2Y stream of consciousness thinking for you: Hasek is in no danger of losing his job to Chris Osgood. Any of the crap in the papers this morning is just that: Digger crap. Grigorenko’s back next week then it’s off to Russia to fail for more money with ugly Russian chicks—no offense to any of you Lapeer Russians. I continued a running argument with a great friend of mine today. Subject? NHL vs. NBA. He’s a huge Pistons fan and says Rasheed Wallace is a “great teammate, a character guy.” I guess if your definition of a great character guy is someone who takes bong hits during tv timeouts than he’s on the money. Did I really predict Valteri Filppula will score 25 goals this year. Dammit. I’m sticking by it. I’m off to the office. Back for the second.

2341: Ha. All you naysayers (mostly the diggers). Kronwall…what a great play. Off the schnide.

0001: Holy Schnikees. I fell asleep and missed Zetterberg’s goal. Thanks Gary. Thanks Dave.

0006
: Who gave that puck away? Was that Rafalski? Sharks’ announcers: they’re really buzzing after that second Shark goal. Arena is silent.

0009: Nice. Thornton goes after Zetterberg and Dasyuk pops him from behind…not like THAT Dive fans, jeez…retaliation and a power play. Brought to you by your future Wing Leadership.

0054. Hi. I’m still here. I was resting. Not asleep. Resting. I did miss Ellis’ goal, but only because things were going on here. Firetrucks, dancing girls and puppies were out in the street. I had to watch the festivities. I wasn’t asleep. And I saw the Datsyuk goal, the ho-hum two points for Zetterberg.

0104
: Reaction: Wings look better the last four minutes than they have the entire game. That could be due to the fact that I slept through the previous 16. I’m not sure.

0116
: Good win. As Matt pointed out, it may have come at a price as Rafalski may be hurt along with Drake. Great elbow to the chops of Thornton by Chelios. Made me well up with pride and happiness. I’m going to bed. You can’t stop me. Thanks Gary. Ass.

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977. No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y. Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation. There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature. Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that.