from Tony Gallagher of the Vancouver Province,

Here are the Bruin ingredients, with some fun chipped in.

You need a freaky, huge, gifted and intelligent monster of a defenceman like Zdeno Chara, who intimidates most attackers and downright terrifies almost all Euro forwards. Stanley and Livingstone may have to be hired as scouts to find that guy.

Then you need a mobile, surly yet gifted monster like Milan Lucic who will combine with Chara and the likes of Shawn Thornton (who can be found anywhere) to give your team that personality of the bully. It empowers every player on your team to play tougher. Guys like Lucic are extremely difficult to find, but we suppose it’s possible.

Then it would help if you are able to get your owner elected chairman of the Board of Governors and perhaps even get him on the committee which determines the compensation of the commissioner.

Then it might, repeat might, be helpful if you can have a player on your team whose father is way up the ladder in the decision-making process of the league. And then you need to recognize as a team that the officials can only call so many penalties against one team on most nights, and given the way you play you’re going to need outstanding goaltending and an excellent penalty kill.

Then you are going to play tough, take those first two, maybe even three calls, but then once that happens, you’ll be able to walk around punching people in the face or sticking them any time you feel like it and nothing will be called, at least until you get a couple of power-play chances of your own.

That’s how the Bruins are perceived out here, at least. Can you pull that off, Trev?

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