Dear Toronto Maple Leafs,
Please stop sucking. This city of 5.5 million people needs you.
Think of us like Gotham City. In ruins.
We have not seen a playoff game since the 2003-2004 season. There are people in this city who have never been old enough to legally see a Leaf Playoff game in a bar even though they are over 19.
Over the course of the last 6 years of post-season drought, we have bought each of your new jerseys (home, away and third), bought tickets to the games, spent thousands of dollars on bar tabs and planned the parade route each year (we’re keeping the blueprints because obviously this is the year right?).