There’s a title I don’t want to write ever again. But that’s where we’re at, thanks to the illustrious Jack Edwards and his unfortunate access to a radio signal.

So, yes, Alex Burrows wasn’t suspended and it seems like everyone’s pretty ticked about it. (Message received. Gross miscarriage of justice, etc etc.) But that’s cool. Everyone’s entitled to their opinion. And at least no one’s written me anything as insane as in the audio below, kindly provided by Matt Yoder at Awful Announcing.

I’ll let him set it up:

This audio from Jack addresses Vancouver’s Alex Burrows biting the hand of Boston’s Patrice Bergeron. Surprisingly, Burrows was not suspended by the NHL. Thankfully though, the entire incident has given us this video of Jack Torrance… err… I mean Edwards, providing a poignant social commentary on the matter complete with some kind of circus music. By the way, congrats if you spun the Jack Edwards Wheel of Insanity and landed on Breastfeeding.

Audio: