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Abel to Yzerman

Hey Pinky…We’ve Missed You Big Boy

In case you’d forgotten, this literary genius doesn’t like you.  Not one bit.

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I’ve got to tell you. Over all these years, tens of thousands of posts, a million PBRs, and countless contentious discussions with bloggers from other towns, writing about teams inferior to ours…laying waste to Hockey Wilderness’ Brian Reynolds was some of the most fun we’ve had. 

Let’s take a stroll back to the A2Y archives and pull out a couple highlights.  And remember, this whole ditty started because Big Pinky was downright tearful that the Wild weren’t giving him The Access he damn well deserves.  Like our pal Dater, he wants…no he craves…the chance to “bond” with his heroes.  Pinky believes that bloggers should be right there asking the tough questions, drilling down and drilling deep.  And, don’t forget, Pinky felt it was dirty men like me that kept him from fulfilling his locker room fantasies.

Thank you IwoCPO, and From Abel to Yzerman for ensuring that NHL teams always have plenty of ammunition to use when denying credentials to bloggers who actually have some professionalism. We appreciate it.


You’re welcome Pinky. You were welcome on my birthday in 2009 when you wrote your little manifesto and welcome you remain to this day.

Oh did we blast him that day. We pelted him with juveniliciousness in the post and then you absolutely hammered him that day, and for many, many days after in comments.  Pinky comes up at the oddest times.  He’s the gift that just keeps on giving.  We appreciate you Pinky, you bloated self-righteous mound of a man.  Thank you for all you do every day.

I have no idea whether Big Pinky has his coveted access yet.  I hope he does, because we want him to be happy. Especially since his team, you know, sucks ass.  But Pinky? Don’t forget what you are, son. Don’t ever forget one of our first descriptions of you.

Ned Beatty on a crusade.


You got a real pretty mouth, Pinky. And in case I didn’t tell you three years ago? Nice hat, dipshit.

Now go ahead and suck on this Live Blog.

Filed in: | Abel to Yzerman | Permalink
 

Comments

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bezukov's avatar

Jesus.  Alright Ian!

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

Nate A's avatar

And there’s another. Awesome.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

WestWing's avatar

White boy scores!!!  5-0!!

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

scotts0's avatar

Wow

Posted by scotts0 from New York on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

Trish's avatar

the white guy yessssssssssss

Posted by Trish from PalmBeachCntyFL on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Whitey!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Dayum.Ian White bitches.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

SolidTG7's avatar

Someone should replace this goalie.

Posted by SolidTG7 on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

16:35 Valtteri Filppula (21) Slap Shot - Assists: H. Zetterberg (39) & N. Kronwall (17)

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

monkey's avatar

No doubt, I go up 81 to Winchester…

I used to live in Winchester.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Posted by dougie on 03/02/12 at 09:01 PM ET

I’m all for it, bro. A little mini-H2H wouldn’t be a bad thing, fo sho’.

WHITEY with the Lincoln

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

RWBill's avatar

Hawaii FIVE-0

JFC.  White

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

hahahahahahahahahahahaha


that white kid ... he’s a keeper, eh?

nice

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Dirty White Boy

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 03/03/12 at 12:02 AM ET

VooX's avatar

Whitey bounces one in the net.  Scoring is one helluva drug.

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 03/03/12 at 12:03 AM ET

RedMenace's avatar

I used to live in Winchester.

Posted by monkey from here to Timbuktu on 03/02/12 at 09:02 PM ET

STFU

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 03/03/12 at 12:03 AM ET

monkey's avatar

We can do it any damn 3 day weekend we please. Maybe we should do it once the playoffs start. Now that Red Menace has met me a couple of times, maybe he can drive the hour or so. It’s a haul from Richmond, but maybe Bill could maybe make it.

Plenty of beds. Its probably about 2 hours from Roanoke. It would be awesome. Just no Internet porn, Bill. It’s all dial up interwebz

Posted by dougie on 03/02/12 at 09:01 PM ET

Fuggin’ sweet.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 03/03/12 at 12:03 AM ET

calquake's avatar

Anybody going to Staples to see Wings King on 3/13?

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from Warm and sunny SoCal on 03/02/12 at 08:55 PM ET

You talkin’ to me?  I don’t see anybody else around here so you must be talkin’ to me.

Would love to go but I’m probably gonna be back in Washington State taking care of my brother-in-law whose got a nasty infection in his leg just totally f*cking him up… he’s going to have his second emergency operation in three weeks tonight.

Posted by calquake on 03/03/12 at 12:04 AM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

17:42 Ian White (7) Slap Shot - Assists: none

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/03/12 at 12:04 AM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Posted by monkey from here to Timbuktu on 03/02/12 at 09:02 PM ET

So go ahead and ignore my PM… lulz.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 03/03/12 at 12:04 AM ET

RWBill's avatar

Holy PHuck, I must have just come down off something,  does any one ELSE realize the score is JUST 5-0?  I was thinking it was 9-0.

This ain’t GOOD.

Posted by RWBill from the Land of 12 in 12. on 03/02/12 at 08:01 PM ET

Posted by RWBill from the Land of 12 in 12. on 03/02/12 at 08:55 PM ET

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 03/03/12 at 12:04 AM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

No Bud Lynch goals!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/03/12 at 12:05 AM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Posted by RWBill from the Land of 12 in 12. on 03/02/12 at 09:04 PM ET

Posted by RWBill from the Land of 12 in 12. on 03/02/12 at 08:01 PM ET

Posted by RWBill from the Land of 12 in 12. on 03/02/12 at 08:55 PM ET

Posted by RWBill from the Land of 12 in 12. on 03/02/12 at 09:04 PM ET

Houston… come in, Houston…

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 03/03/12 at 12:05 AM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

Aloha bitches. I’m awake. It’s 0504 CVST.

Bill: You’re a sick fucher and I dig that about you.
TeamDub, Gabe and Gramps: all made appearances tonite and that warms me.
Okie: FUCH YES brother.  There is nothing better.

And Pinky can continue to suck it. 5-0 as I type this.  Access that, bitch.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 03/03/12 at 12:06 AM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

You talkin’ to me?  I don’t see anybody else around here so you must be talkin’ to me.
Would love to go but I’m probably gonna be back in Washington State taking care of my brother-in-law whose got a nasty infection in his leg just totally f*cking him up… he’s going to have his second emergency operation in three weeks tonight.
Posted by calquake on 03/02/12 at 09:04 PM ET

Sorry to here about your bro-in-law, Travis.

Sounds like flesh eating bacteria. Your bro-in-law hasn’t been hangin out in Denver with some “guy” named Darren, has he?

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/03/12 at 12:06 AM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

SOG after two 10-25 Wings

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/03/12 at 12:07 AM ET

dougie's avatar

A quick game synopsis , through 2 periods, for those following by LiveBlog.

Detroit has kicked Minnesota’s ass until their noses bled. Then it was the second period. Detroit kicked their asses until thy bled out their anuses (sorry, I have no experience in plural anuses, is it anii, perhaps??)

Posted by dougie on 03/03/12 at 12:07 AM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

he’s going to have his second emergency operation in three weeks tonight.

Posted by calquake on 03/02/12 at 09:04 PM ET

All the best to your bro-in -law,  Quake.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/03/12 at 12:07 AM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 03/02/12 at 09:06 PM ET

*#$%@& check-in from the Mastah Chief, for real.

Word to *#$%@& Big Bird.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 03/03/12 at 12:07 AM ET

monkey's avatar

So go ahead and ignore my PM… lulz.

It is a tad redundant by now.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 03/03/12 at 12:07 AM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Posted by calquake on 03/02/12 at 09:04 PM ET

Here’s one to the bro-in-law, Cal. Hope he gets better.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 03/03/12 at 12:08 AM ET

WestWing's avatar

sorry, I have no experience in plural anuses

Paging RWBill…....

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 03/03/12 at 12:09 AM ET

RedMenace's avatar

It is a tad redundant by now.

Posted by monkey from here to Timbuktu on 03/02/12 at 09:07 PM ET

Yes, yes it is.

Dammit.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 03/03/12 at 12:09 AM ET

bezukov's avatar

Here’s one to the bro-in-law, Cal. Hope he gets better.

Posted by RedMenace from the darkest recesses on 03/02/12 at 09:08 PM ET

Same here Calquake.

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 03/03/12 at 12:09 AM ET

monkey's avatar

(sorry, I have no experience in plural anuses, is it anii, perhaps??)

Balloon knots.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 03/03/12 at 12:09 AM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

5-0. The most dangerous lead in hockey. Let’s not get lazy, bitches.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/03/12 at 12:09 AM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Since I’m sharing pictures and shit, Raffi Torres being interviewed by the FS Ohio guy during an intermission:

LOLWAT?!

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 03/03/12 at 12:10 AM ET

RWBill's avatar

Just no Internet porn, Bill. It’s all dial up interwebz

Posted by dougie on 03/02/12 at 09:01 PM ET

That’s okay, this pink outfit is etched into my brain, or I could find a drunken Hillbilly’s Red Neck ass crack, not too hard to do on a Friday night.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 03/03/12 at 12:10 AM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

anuses plural of a·nus

Noun:The opening at the end of the alimentary canal through which solid waste matter leaves the body.

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/03/12 at 12:10 AM ET

dougie's avatar

5-0. The most dangerous lead in hockey. Let’s not get lazy, bitches.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Exactly. Next 6 goals are huge.

Posted by dougie on 03/03/12 at 12:11 AM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com