from Pat Hickey of the Montreal Gazette,

What do a recent high-school dropout and the Maple Leafs have in common? They’re both young, have no goals and no prospects.

The mid-winter slump has left the Leafs 13 points out of a playoff spot and it appears the players can look forward to having free time in April for the ninth time in the 10 years since the 2004-05 lockout.

What do the Leafs and a fine wine have in common? They both spend a lot of time in the cellar, cost too much and are only enjoyed on select occasions.

The Leafs players appear to have given up, a fact recognized by interim coach Peter Horachek this week when he said his team’s “give-a-sh— metre has to be higher.”

What’s the difference between an Air Canada Centre hot dog and a Bell Centre hot dog? You can buy a Bell Centre hot dog in May.

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