from Robin Lehner at The Atheltic,
The Meadows in Arizona helped map out my life and it was something I never had the courage to do. I always just suppressed things with substances, impulsive thoughts and behavior. The therapists went through my whole life and opened my eyes to what truly happened. For truly the first time, I found religion. I was baptized in Arizona during this time. This new faith is what helped me through. This was truly one of the best things that ever happened to me and I have to thank Pastor Greg for that.
Today, I am here a happy man that is, for the first time, trying to live in the moment, day-to-day.
The only way I was leaving those doors was when I was 100% certain that I was going to make it. I never want to make my family go through anything like that again. They deserve a dad and my wife, a real husband. If I felt I could not give them that, I wanted to die. I could not let happen what I did to my wife again. There was never domestic violence but the mental suffering over the years watching her husband killing himself slowly was brutal. When I was away, she was never sure I was going to come home.
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