Screw this league. Screw the watered-down product, and the boring games, and the dull players, and the terrible referees. Screw the lockouts and the nonstop merchandising and the outdoor games and the constant cash grabs. Screw the violence and/or lack of violence. Screw Gary Bettman and everyone who looks like him. You're done. You're out.

Note: You will never keep this promise.

-Sean McIndoe at Vice, where you can read more on The BS Guide To The NHL.