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All Things Flaming C

Circling the Drain-Flames Style!

As time marches on, your Flaming C organization continues to hang on to delusions of grandeur and the possibility of playoff time. The 4 straight losses clearly show the non-medically placate that they are not that good right now. As deep as they are with Iggy, Tangs, Gio and Kipper,.........(Jokinen has fallen to levels seen only by Jokinen) the team’s efforts show us some insight into what they are thinking right now. They are using body language as they are discouraged from active interaction with the pee-on consumer we call fans. Let’s discuss.

Most visibly during the start of the games recently, they go ahead and get some life going through the fan base and it says “Hey dumbasses, we are legit! Post some ill-advised love on Facebook immediately!” As the 2nd period rolls around, the team decides to play lethargic, uninspired bumblefuck pond hockey. Generally they will piss away a couple a couple good chances and probably let the team they are leading gain some confidence and the prognosis of a comeback emerges. They are really saying “I’m glad you paid $225 for your jersey but I make $8000 every day I wake up in time for my Exquisite Massage! Don’t get too comfy with our lead cause we ain’t holding it!” Then the fans continue to consume the heartburn meds and beer/whiskey chasers only to have their hometown sweethearts take a monumental deuce on their playoff dreams with a few more missed chances, untimely penalties, and general un-give-a-*#$%@&-ness. It’s one thing to press too hard, it’s another to be lifetime professionals that continue to make the same mistakes. 5 wins in 15 extra time games reeks of something. If it looks like shit, skates like shit, and performs shoot-outs like shit, it’s probably your 2011-12 Flames in extra time. Their body language and nuances says “Please renew season ticket packs to avoid 3% late renewal fee. We wanna hit Priddis Greens with the Oilers asap.Thanks for the unfettered love….loser civilians!” Indeed the team doesn’t intend on losing games for the purpose of early summer vacations, the fan base has seen this song-and-dance way too often. Their loss to lowly Minnesota in the shootout was just typical failed potty training. The situation reached a new dynamic as Coach Sutter stepped away from his other unsuccessful program of using his Superstars in the shootout and went with the likes of Lee-Stemp, Blair Jones, and Blake Comeau. It was not Comeau’s fault the Flames lost again, it was a combination of being against thrust into this predicament and his lousy move on his attempt. Haw haw haw. It never should have been an issue. Losing breeds losing, ugly people breeding makes ugly children. The Flames fans are getting ugly, en masse. Of course I speak of their temperament. It’s getting to the point where the expectation is that they will forge a lead, then piss it away. Wherein lies the problem?

The answers lie in the management. Craig Conroy is the Dwight Schrute of the Calgary Flames. Assistant to the General Manager. Sounds fairly insignificant. Give him a real title. John Weisbrod-no people skills, go back in the 4-H program and take some public speaking courses, clean the ditches of the TransCanada, and treat these players like human pieces of meat, not just the piece of meat part. Ken King, our dear Calgary Herald editor of days gone by. You are the jewel of the managerial empire as you have stood through the firings, ridiculous signings and kept your gig by micromanaging and telling the board what they want to hear. It’s time for you to go. The culture needs to change. We’ll let you stay if they squeak into the playoffs by some sort of miracle….until summer only. Brent Sutter- what can be said about him? I’d love to hear what everyone is saying. The shootout debacle Thursday night wasn’t a good enough reason to let him go. His hairdo’s are another story. I like him, to be honest….with that pathetic hand he has been dealt with you can only hope he slaps his bro that left him this mess. GM J-Feast has done an adequate job. He’s shed salary and left the team in the same predicament, if not better than expected. All bets are off if Kipper wasn’t so frickin’ good this season after a slight drop off in 2010-11, statistically at least.

It’s not time to fix all the fissures of our fractured Flames just yet. The fans are furious, the players are as well, as one could hear from Alex Tanguay post game. I’ve been inundated by fuming fans at wit’s end. Even worse- Hater Nation is chirping like rec leaguers with the vision of a Flame’s demise. I still say I’d rather have a team in the hunt, than a team in the hunt of the #1 Draft Pick every year. Though it seems that the recent late game collapses are the only thing keeping them from the sanctity of the playoff soiree. It’s pissing us all off.


7 and 0 may still get them in; keep the faith,

Scooter Baxter, ironically a tough #4

@Scootermario on Twitter.

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Comments

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Nice job, Scooter. Have to say I agree. The last 5 outings have been horrendously aggravating from a fans perspective. Up 2-zip against the Wild and not being able to put the game away is more then a little disappointing at this time of the year. The best players on the team have went into their early spring slumber once again, save Kipper. What was once in their hands, now hinges on a Flames like collapse by at least 2 other teams in the West. Ick.

Posted by Breb on 03/24/12 at 11:08 AM ET

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Flames win a big game last night. Keeping all those fans in the seats for next year so they can make the millions and Scooter can keep on writing. Who says ugly people make ugly kids - your kids are good looking!!!!!

Posted by tt boy from edmonton on 03/27/12 at 11:55 AM ET

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