Above the Glass
In the ongoing search for mature, responsible off-season hobbies, I was sure decrypting the math that goes into the plus/minus rating would keep me busy for several days. I envisioned a complicated formula devised by MIT graduates that used a top secret combination of morse code, algebra and calculus like multiplying the number of games played by the number of goals scored minus the number of goals allowed plus the number of players on the full roster, minus the number of players on the ice at the time the goal was scored. Imagine my surprise and delight when, at last, I discovered an NHL rule that is exactly what it sounds like: a statistic that measures goal differential, it awards a plus to players on the ice at the time their team scored a goal, and a minus to players on the ice at the time their team allowed a goal. Genius. Now that I know what goes into the on-ice math, it occurred to me that there isn’t a rule for the things that can’t be calculated with math, like heart, soul, character and other intangibles that make a player who he is. But what if there was?
Readers who were brave enough to read my last entry will be pleased to know that I have found a useful, grown up hobby: reading and interpreting choice bits from the Collective Bargaining Agreement. On tap this weekend: Article 50, which governs hockey-related revenue, player salaries and bonuses. So far, I only have one question. Is there anything for which NHL players don’t receive a bonus?
There are several things you probably shouldn’t hand a hockey fan, especially one who has a blog or two, notably too much free time without hockey. Because some of us, whilst trolling the newspaper for a summer movie (like say, the new Winnie the Pooh movie, for example) to fill the weeknights where hockey would have otherwise been the night’s entertainment, come up with thoughts like what would happen if Winnie the Pooh enforced the Collective Bargaining Agreement and/or the NHL Rulebook? If you are brave and crazy enough to continue reading this entry, then you deserve to know that during the hockey season I’m a totally normal person who reports on relevant news like prospect profiles, WHL news tidbits and my thoughts on the latest trades and what not. But here in the off season, without junior hockey, barbecue nachos or Center Ice to occupy my free time, my mind tends to wander. Yes, there’s plenty to occupy the off-season, ‘tis true. But I see that the trained hockey blogging professionals have that turf covered, so I am here to offer a little levity in the midst of it all. That being said, don’t ask me where I came up with this idea. No clue. But that never stopped me before. So here you go: what if a cuddly little bear all stuffed with fluff enforced the NHL’s rules and what not?
Among the many shiny, happy ways I am filling the dark days of the off season is keeping track of all the cool things the Portland Winterhawks are up to this summer. For those drafted by the NHL, it means development camp and media interviews and what not. For a select few, it will mean an additional trip to the World Junior development camps. Younger players like Josh Hanson, Brendan Leipsic and Derrick Pouliot have already secured a spot or will be vying for a chance to play in the Ivan Hlinka Memorial Tournament, which involves the chance to travel to the Europe and represent their country in an international competition. I’m happy for them, but I must admit that keeping track of the Rose City’s rising stars made me wonder what the heck I was doing at their age and why didn’t it involve playing hockey and/or a $900,000 entry level contract? Because not everyone is meant to become an overnight sensation at 18 and not everyone gets to hear their name called on draft day. Which made me realize that the road to adulthood is not unlike the road to the NHL. Well, except maybe the NHL pays better.
It’s beginning to look a lot like summer here in the Pacific Northwest. The perfect time for several Portland Winterhawks to dispatch to NHL development camps. Among them are the obvious: Calgary Flames first rounder Sven Bartschi and defenseman Joe Morrow, who is off to Consol Energy Center this week. Among the not so obvious is forward Taylor Peters, who has already seen the inside of Consol, having been invited to the Pens’ training camp last fall. This year, it was the Minnesota Wild who came calling. Keep Taylor on the radar. He’s not the name on everyone’s lips at the moment, but he may be in the near future. Watching while our players make the most of their precious youth makes me outwardly proud and inwardly jealous that it’s all still ahead of them and the possibilities are still endless. But not all is lost here in middle age. Those of us who were the boys’ age when cavemen were still experimenting with fire can still hang on to our youth, even if only in our hearts and minds. It just takes a few less regrets, a few more workouts, and a lot of faith.
I’ve learned yet another thing or two about hockey this past week. First, a lot can happen in one week: while I was off sleeping eight hours a night, every night, nibbling my way through the Public Market on Granville Island and lounging by a hotel pool, players like Max Talbot and Jaromir Jagr went to the dark side. Second, you can learn a lot from shopping in Victoria, BC and the free agent frenzy: like the fact that hockey is first and foremost a business, that Ryan Johansen likes bowling, and that NHL teams have in fact, embraced fuzzy slippers in their swag collections.
I am off for a weeklong vacation in Vancouver and Victoria (Canada Day in the BC capital + free agent frenzy all over Canadian TV. What could be better?), but before I go I wanted to leave Pittsburgh fans with a few choice tidbits about one of my favorite Portland Winterhawks, Joe Morrow. Chosen 23rd overall by the Penguins, he’s got a deadly shot from the point, a good family upbringing, an eye for the net, and he’s not afraid to start a fight now and again. And that’s just for starters.
The Calgary Flames chose well when they picked Portland Winterhawk Sven Bartschi 13th overall in the NHL Entry Draft. I know because I’ve spent the last season watching up close while his star rose ever higher and getting to know him off the ice. There is nobody quite like Sven; he’s one of a kind and I can assure Calgary fans that Portland’s small but mighty gift to the NHL will be worth the hype. By now, you’ve probably read the news, scanned the stats and looked up his WHL profile, so allow me to introduce you to some of the things you may not know about the Flames’ newest prize catch.
When I was little, my father used to pull up to the McDonald’s drive-thru window with the family unit in the car and order “Big Macs all around.” Like the poor high school student taking his order could telepathically see how many of us were in the car, and therefore he didn’t need to announce how many burgers he wanted. I don’t know why, but I remembered that when I was watching the NHL Awards on Wednesday and it made me think “awards all around.” Players, coaches and GMs get big shiny objects for everything from leadership to community service to gentlemanly play. But I noticed that nowhere does the league give out awards to the ordinary superstars who support, watch, promote and otherwise contribute to the game beyond the ice. In recognition of this unmet need, I have devised my own system of awards for the everyday people who help ensure that players and fans alike enjoy an optimal hockey experience.
The unrestricted free agency season opens on July 1, giving qualifiied players the chance to shop themselves around to the highest bidder if they haven’t been re-signed by their current team. If only it were that easy. Alas, the creators of the Collective Bargaining Agreement didn’t follow the cardinal rule of hockey: keep it simple. Take, for example, Article 10, Free Agency. Age and experience are part of how players qualify, as is the number of seasons played. Kinda like life, only we don’t have a complicated collective bargaining agreement to guarantee that we have the right to go freelance and determine our worth by something more meaningful than how many rungs of the corporate ladder we’ve climbed. But what if we did?
About Above the Glass
Welcome to Above the Glass, a definitive anti-expert’s guide to hockey. I started blogging in 2009 as part of an effort to learn all 87 rules in the NHL Rulebook in 107 days before the 2010 Olympics, 30 years after I discovered the sport. You can peruse the archival results here. Growing up in Arizona, I didn’t even know hockey existed until February 22, 1980, when the USA played Russia in the Olympics. And just like that, the game of the century changed my life. I still don’t quite understand the icing rule or which faceoff circle goes with what offense, but I do know that every aspect of hockey has something to teach us about life. That’s what you’ll find here, along with my unadulterated passion for the game.
I live in Portland, Oregon, home of the WHL’s Portland Winterhawks. I invite anyone who wants to know more about hockey in the Rose City to visit here, where I blog exclusively about the Winterhawks. I’ll post an occasional musing about the Hawks, the WHL and junior hockey here as well.
Follow me on Twitter: @AbovetheGlass