Abel to Yzerman
Entries with the tag: genius a2y readers
One, our latest contest has garnered a less than enthusiastic reaction. Wrong answer. Design your damn playoff banners and send them to me so I can post them and we can all laugh at our collective immaturity.
Two, the glossary’s been updated. Some of you will be pleased. Others will be angry (Andrew) that I elected to make fun of you in such a public manner. As always, your suggestions for improvement can be added to the comment section of this post or emailed to me directly. Additions you prompted: Ass Can, Anti-Digger, SMOC, BTHIRMFers and more!
Some of you may have skimmed over the mention of our newest contest. Understandable. It was at the end of a post and by that time you were probably so overwhelmed by the literary goodness that is the typical A2Y post that your eyes were all foggy and stuff.
Refreshing your memory: submit your suggested banner to be used during the playoffs. Winner will receive a fabulous A2Y gift and the unquestioned honor of seeing their work displayed here all the way through June. Yep…June.
We have our first entry…and it’s a good one.
Pierre LeBrun, on Toronto’s Fan 590, said earlier that Lidstrom is going to have to convince Uncle Mike he’s ready if he expects to play this Sunday, that the staff will take exactly zero chances on a re-injury. Good.
Now I know why we didn’t hear much from recently-engaged A2Y contributor Team Dub last night. We’ve got late-breaking footage (stolen from Japers’ Rink) of him at last night’s Cap/Islander game.
Update below: there is a poll at the bottom of this post, and the results are shocking.
This is about a week old. You may have seen it. I had not. It made me happy and hopefully it has the same effect on you.
Yes, we’re going to make it official. Name the Zetterberg, Datsyuk, Homer line. Send in your suggestions and we’ll vote and happiness will ensue, as usual. What do you get? Why does it always have to be about “getting something”? You get the warmth that accompanies seeing your brilliance used again and again within the cozy confines of A2Y.
So you get jack squat.
1102 EST: Updated with Digger reaction below.
The subtleties. It’s the subtleties we forget during the offseason. The little things that we have to get used to again that make the whole viewing experience unique. Example? Sure. I’d forgotten about late night hockey and how to prepare for it. I’d forgotten that a 2030 start time required the type of moderation I hadn’t been practicing on your standard Saturday.
I’d forgotten that dowsing myself with Heineken (yes, I’ve made the switch from Rolling Rock) for 6 hours prior to game time comes real close to ensuring that by the second period I’d be wondering why Greg Stefan was wearing number 39.
Just as the voting had to end, so must begin the campaign to take the winner to the masses. You have selected the graphic that should have been and I’ll unveil it to you in less than twenty seconds, or however long it takes you to read the next two paragraphs. Bubba, you have six hours.
In the end, it was art over wit, talent over cynicism. For our purposes, pushing our graphic to the general public, the right choice was made.
But, man…I had my sights set on BJ’s for everyone. Now without further delay, I give you the winner of the “replace the Fire On Ice graphic because it truly resembles the work of a fourth grade girl experimenting with pastels and cute little hockey icons” contest.
Updated 2106 EST: Polls are closed. Aaron’s last vote for himself was the final marker. A dubious way to end an otherwise noble competition. Certainly Aaron, you must realize that a move like that is not in keeping with the level of maturity we try to cultivate around here. Hey…did you guys hear OJ said today, “I thought what happens in Vegas, stays in Vegas”? Really. He actually said that. What a tool. Will have results posted NLT 2300.
It’s hard to describe the atmosphere at A2Y HQ right now. Staffers are running mindlessly around trying to tally last-minute votes. The firetrucks are posted outside. Hooters Girls are throwing tennis balls for puppies. I’m trying to maintain calm here but like the subject of this post may have led you to believe, it’s almost like just before that boat in Wonka comes to a stop after the harrowing ride through the dark tunnel when Willie catches that plump little devil picking her nose.
Three hours left. Addicted To Red has a five-vote lead. You have until 2100 (yes, 9pm EST) to let your voice be heard. Democracy rules. Transvestite Dive Fans suck. Vote now. Vote often. Entries are below. Send cheese courtesy of US Navy, Washington, DC.
Look. I’m not going to lie to you. I got very little sleep last night because I’m so excited about the democratic blood that is pumping through the veins of our little sarcastic home. You’ve voted early, in some cases often, and obviously with sober forethought. For that, I applaud you. Just over twelve hours remain in the competition to replace “Fire On Ice: John Hahn’s Latest Bit of Evidence That He Points At You and Laughs While He Sips Wine Coolers In The Executive Box At The Joe”.
Polls close at 2100.
We’re going to close the polls Monday at 2100. The contest that has fascinated Wing nation for a week, the “replace Fire on Ice with a marketing and pr campaign not designed by 16-year old girls wasted on Boone’s Farm” competition, is nearly over and it’s so close that it’s hard for me to type because I’m so nervous.
Your choices are listed below and the standings are beneath them. I believe, thanks to the subtle reminders of our readers, that they are correct. But—and I know you will anyway—check my math if you must. According to my calculations, there’s a three-way tie at the top. Remember: how you vote is critical to the collective happiness of us all. You’re going to have to look at this thing all year long. Vote in the comment section of this post.
The votes are pouring in at such a rate that I’m starting to get nervous. My lips are so cold. Four days remain in our contest to “replace the Fire on Ice marketing campaign with something that doesn’t suck quite as much.”
Below you’ll find the selections and the current vote tally. All votes for the next 24 hours will be made in the comment section of this post.
It’s been more than twelve hours since I made the bold statement that I sounded exactly like Ozzy on the way home from work yesterday. It takes a confident blogger to write that. I’ll bet Paul wouldn’t. Well how about this? I sang “Cool Change” by Little River Band all the way to the house this afternoon and I nailed that sucker too. That’s called range.
Speaking of which, we have ourselves a day of votes to tally. Some lucky winner will win some winnings and I, for one, can’t wait to walk up to that winner and wistfully wish them well. One day down, six to go before we determine the official A2Y graphic guru. We’ll run the entries by you then list the current vote standings at the bottom. All votes for the next 24 hours will take place in the comment section of this brilliantly written post.