Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Yes…Live Blog It. But Don’t Watch This Game.  It Will Be Too Painful.

I don't know how we can do it.  Scientifically, it's probably impossible.  But one way or another? We need to Live Blog this game without...actually...watching...it.

You guys take days like this way too seriously.  Losses affect you in obscene ways, and usually the consequences are hygienic in nature.  And that's not good.  Today will be horrible.  Chicago is too good. They haven't lost in Detroit in 8 games.  They lead the league in scoring, defense, minor in possession offenses and specialty play.  They're going to win the Cup, the Jennings, the Clemente award.

The Wings have no chance.  

So you can't watch it.  Don't even listen to it. Just comment when you feel a tingle.  Or don't comment at all.  Read something.  Write your congressman a ditty and tell him the Navy actually, you know, belongs at sea and it might be a good idea to, you know, get his fat ass back to Washington and send us there...to sea, that is. That's a sequestration reference, by the way.

But don't watch this shit show.  And a shit show it will be. Detroyet doesn't  have the firepower. Our young defense is just not stout enough. Our coach is overrated and their coach is a savant.

They have Hossa. We have Franzen.  Repeat that to yourself five times and then end it all.

The mountain is too steep.  The only thing the Wings possibly have going for them...

...is the fact that they simply win games like this.  They do and you know it.  You've been looking forward to this with calm confidence when all the smart kids say we should dread it.

You don't dread it.  Because you know.

Wings win. In regulation.  By two goals.

Forget what I said about not watching this. That was stupid. Watch this one.  It's a Live Blog bitches.

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Comments

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MOWingsfan19's avatar

We have our new whipping boy.
Homegrown at that.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 03/03/13 at 01:00 PM ET

MoreShoot's avatar

What does Abby contribute?  I’ve forgot

Posted by MoreShoot on 03/03/13 at 01:00 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Dear Abby,
  How do I tell someone they don’t have what it takes to do their job and maybe they should consider a demotion?
Signed,
Frustrated in Cali
Posted by calquake on 03/03/13 at 12:57 PM ET

Dear Frustrated in Cali,

The cure for frustration is rubbing one out. And hang the toilet paper over the the front.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/03/13 at 01:01 PM ET

monkey's avatar

What does Abby contribute?  I’ve forgot

I was just about to ask the same thing.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/03/13 at 01:01 PM ET

Mandingo's avatar

Any references to “subtle interference” from F*ckczyk yet?

Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 03/03/13 at 01:01 PM ET

shanetx's avatar

Cessna 152,172,182 and a Piper Arrow II.  Worked on my instrument rating and Commercial license.

That’s cool.  My granddad used to have a 182 and a 180.  Been out of the airplane game for a while, but we just bought a 152 last fall.  Time to get my license.

Posted by shanetx from Floydada, Texas on 03/03/13 at 01:01 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Nice icing franzen.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/03/13 at 01:01 PM ET

dougie's avatar

What does Abby contribute?  I’ve forgot

Gives Franzen something to aspire to?

Posted by dougie on 03/03/13 at 01:03 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

The Wings have 2 shots???

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/03/13 at 01:03 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Howdy bitches.  I wanna see someone get kronwalled.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 03/03/13 at 01:03 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Mule-sless. 

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/03/13 at 01:03 PM ET

MoreShoot's avatar

Did I just see Kronner let up on an opportunity to destroy Bickel on the boards?

Posted by MoreShoot on 03/03/13 at 01:04 PM ET

monkey's avatar

When are the Wings going to stop playing the PK?

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/03/13 at 01:04 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Dear Frustrated in Cali,

The cure for frustration is rubbing one out. And hang the toilet paper over the the front.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from Warm and sunny SoCal on 03/03/13 at 01:01 PM ET

And here I thought I was going blind because I was getting older.

Posted by calquake on 03/03/13 at 01:04 PM ET

calquake's avatar

It’s really criminal making Pavel play between 11 and 8.

Posted by calquake on 03/03/13 at 01:06 PM ET

monkey's avatar

It’s really criminal making Pavel play between 11 and 8.

Harrison Bergeron.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/03/13 at 01:06 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

Seems to be more than subtle contact with Howard quite regularly.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 03/03/13 at 01:07 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

Wow Franzen had a chance to absolutely destroy Kane while Zetterberg was checking him and just coasted by watching the play…

Posted by pgoody on 03/03/13 at 01:07 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Constant possession and pressure.  Not good for the home team.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/03/13 at 01:07 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Nice defensive play by Ericsson, again.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/03/13 at 01:08 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Harrison Bergeron.

Posted by monkey from Fear and Loathing on 03/03/13 at 01:06 PM ET

Why would Harrison Ford and Tom Bergeron be any better?

Posted by calquake on 03/03/13 at 01:08 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

More Shoot needed - WINGS!

LGRW

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 03/03/13 at 01:08 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

I would love to see Eaves on a line with pav.  He will shoot the damn puck.  And not a liability.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 03/03/13 at 01:08 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

1 to go in the 1st ... pucker-up

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/03/13 at 01:08 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Yet another icing.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/03/13 at 01:09 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

It seems like 18 minutes of that period were spent in Detroit’s end

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/03/13 at 01:10 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Datsyuk takes matters into his own hands.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/03/13 at 01:10 PM ET

calquake's avatar

1 to go in the 1st ... pucker-up

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/03/13 at 01:08 PM ET

Diamonds in the soles of my shoes.

Posted by calquake on 03/03/13 at 01:10 PM ET

dougie's avatar

We had some good scoring chances. Too bad they were in California last Thursday.

Posted by dougie on 03/03/13 at 01:10 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Chicago’s first twenty minutes of power play has ended.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/03/13 at 01:10 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

Talk about a rebound…. jeebsus nobody driving the net with seconds to go.
That line should never come over the boards ever again.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 03/03/13 at 01:11 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Well, that’s 20…

LET’S GO RED WINGS !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 03/03/13 at 01:11 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

end of 1.

good for crawford, he needs to change his diaper after pav’s shot

smile

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/03/13 at 01:12 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Talk about a rebound…. jeebsus nobody driving the net with seconds to go.
That line should never come over the boards ever again.

Lazy and Stupid strike again.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/03/13 at 01:13 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Look on the bright side, at least our PP wasn’t called on in that period. Otherwise, we could be trailing 0-1.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/03/13 at 01:17 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

I’m not sure anyone’s noticed this but Uncle Mike has Datsyuk playing with Cleary and Abdelkader.  Has anyone mentioned to him just how fuching stupid and wasteful that is?

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 03/03/13 at 01:21 PM ET

monkey's avatar

I’m not sure anyone’s noticed this but Uncle Mike has Datsyuk playing with Cleary and Abdelkader.  Has anyone mentioned to him just how fuching stupid and wasteful that is?

Forsooth, verily.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/03/13 at 01:23 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

G’dafternoon kids.  Just joining in after seeing the last two minutes.  Was the Wings play indicative of the shots on goal?  At least the score isn’t 9-3 right?

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from where free agents no longer dare. on 03/03/13 at 01:24 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

I’m not sure anyone’s noticed this but Uncle Mike has Datsyuk playing with Cleary and Abdelkader.  Has anyone mentioned to him just how fuching stupid and wasteful that is?

Indeed.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/03/13 at 01:24 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Has anyone mentioned to him just how fuching stupid and wasteful that is?
Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 03/03/13 at 01:21 PM ET

It shows he’s qualified to serve in Congress.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/03/13 at 01:24 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com