Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Welcome To The Night Of The Living Dead

Updated below with Voox' annual DC contest.

As predicted...

...it's been a motherfucher of a day.  So we're starting way early, as I expect most of you are.

I'm in no mood for hijinks and I hope the Wings aren't either.

The Streak is the Thing right now.  Tomorrow we can worry about the next step that baby Jesus told us we should expect every season.  But tonite?

Tonite, it's all about 22.  

No other team in this damn league can lay current claim to the success of this organ-I-zation.  No other team can claim a fan base as rabid as you are, and I'll put ours--with our transplants and our Yoopers and our downriver puck bunnies--up against anyone's, Toronto and Montreal included.  

The streak continues tonite because it must.  The streak continues because every other team wants it to end, all other fans need it to end, every media member except ours (minus Drew Sharp and Pat Caputo) has the story already written and are just waiting to hit send.

Screw this league, this charade orchestrated by a shrew of a fraud commissioner.  Screw you, the fans of every other team. And I mean EVERY other team.  Detroit has carried this league.  The Red Wings have filled your warm-weather arenas and you can kiss all that revenue goodbye starting next October...finally.  

You pray for our demise but you can all suck it because this display of sustained superior performance continues tonite.

Extend The Streak, Wings. Just. Get. In.

It's a Live Blog, bitches.  All aboard. 

WAIT...DON'T LEAVE  YET.  This just in from Voox...

Playoff traditions are widespread, so let's get the word out again about our own playoff tradition.

The annual "Pierre McGuire is a Douche Canoe Ticket Contest" is back.  Get a sign on TV behind Pierre McGuire's head saying Pierre is a Douche Canoe and win tickets to a Maple Leafs regular season home game of your choice next year.

To ensure you get credit for this incredible public service, email douchecanoe.contest@gmail.com in advance so I can award the tickets to you once successful.  All emails will be strictly confidential, good luck to all.

Filed in: | Abel to Yzerman | Permalink
 

Comments

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monkey's avatar

It’s on now.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/27/13 at 03:04 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Leipold was pacing. When he spotted me looking at him, he just looked at me and shook his head in disgust.

Leipold has one of the highest payrolls in the NHL. He just spent $196 million on long-term contracts on two players. How will he respond if the Wild misses?

Tell him to talk to Toronto, Philadelphia, New York Rangers, etc, etc, about what it’s like to spend money like a drunken idiot and get very little in return.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/27/13 at 03:12 PM ET

Primis's avatar

It’s not even the Streak, Chief.

It’s about making the playoffs, getting a chance to still play while others are golfing and watching on TV, and rubbing it in the faces of clowns like NAS, COL, and hopefully MIN that they didn’t get the chance to.

It’s about maybe getting a crack to completely ruin CHI’s season.
It’s about vengeance possibly on the Poultry for That Game, you know the game.
It’s about not being ready for Tigers baseball just yet.
It’s about not being one of those markets for whom the NFL Draft is the most-important thing about this weekend.
It’s about beating down DAL one last time as a parting gift, just because they deserve it.

So many reasons.  And The Streak doesn’t need to be one of them.

Posted by Primis on 04/27/13 at 03:21 PM ET

Primis's avatar

Screw you, the fans of every other team. And I mean EVERY other team.  Detroit has carried this league.  The Red Wings have filled your warm-weather arenas and you can kiss all that revenue goodbye starting next October…finally.

PS…. *THIS*.

Posted by Primis on 04/27/13 at 03:23 PM ET

Avatar

No hoping someone does the job for you.  Walk into the playoffs like a pimp, taking out Dallas whore-style…the Wing way.  I want to fall asleep tonight sated by the tears and anguish of mass disappointment from the other 29 teams’ fans and beat writers once again watching their hopes for the Wings’ demise fade away.

It’s on now.

Posted by monkey from Fear and Loathing on 04/27/13 at 03:04 PM ET

It is indeed on

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 04/27/13 at 03:24 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

And to make things worse the MLB monopoly has blocked me from watching the Tigers on the internet stream, because the Washington DC Nationals are being broadcast on TV

F You, mlb, you owe me a refund.  This hasn’t made passing 12 hours easier.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/27/13 at 03:28 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

The streak won’t end. It can’t end.

The hockey gods (Howe, Stevie and St Nick) won’t allow us to say goodbye to Central after playing friggin’ Nashville. Our last Western game cannot be in Dallas.

Seventh place. Ducks, then ‘Hawks, then the Cloutiers. In the end, our arrival in the East, showing them what they can expect for the rest of their lives.

(unless Bettman pulls a Bettman in two years).

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/27/13 at 03:38 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

I’m nervous as hell. Game 7 tonite, bar exam tomorrow.

Shoot me.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/27/13 at 03:39 PM ET

Soupsnake's avatar
http://youtu.be/AgFeZr5ptV8 

Posted by Soupsnake from Canton, Mi on 04/27/13 at 03:41 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/27/13 at 03:43 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Game 7 tonite, bar exam tomorrow.

Shoot me.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/27/13 at 03:39 PM ET


Best of luck.  Bar exam on Sunday?  There ought to be a law!

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/27/13 at 03:45 PM ET

Primis's avatar

RWBill -

http://www.firstrow1.eu/sport/baseball.html

Usually fairly good luck there.

Posted by Primis on 04/27/13 at 03:46 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

Ball games cancelled for the little dude. I’m in for tonight
And since I was up at 3:30am… I won’t lie. I cracked one at about 11.
Giddy up boys…. 60 minutes to 22… one shift at a time.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 04/27/13 at 03:52 PM ET

Hootinani's avatar

Tell him to talk to Toronto, Philadelphia, New York Rangers, etc, etc, about what it’s like to spend money like a drunken idiot and get very little in return.

Posted by monkey from Fear and Loathing on 04/27/13 at 03:12 PM ET

Too bad it was our money he was spending, to bid against us no less

Damn socialists and their revenue sharing

Posted by Hootinani on 04/27/13 at 03:59 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

thanks, Chief.

I really like our team

... win and in.

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/27/13 at 04:00 PM ET

mrfluffy's avatar

It’s about not being ready for Tigers baseball just yet.

Posted by Primis on 04/27/13 at 03:21 PM ET

It’s also about reminding Illitch (pick one) which team carried him when it matter most.

Posted by mrfluffy from Long Beach on 04/27/13 at 04:01 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

It’s a Live Blog, bitches.

It’s not even the Streak, Chief. It’s about making the playoffs

Posted by Primis on 04/27/13 at 03:21 PM ET

My sentiments exactly, Primis.

Let’s Roll. Playoff-style.

I know, Shut. Whore. Mouth.
(no jink)

Bitches.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/27/13 at 04:03 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Tigers win.  Time enough to shower and grocery shop and get back to the safety of home before darkness and The Living Dead hockey teams take to the ice against the good guys.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/27/13 at 04:05 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

I will not be switching between games tonite to see who’s doing what. None of that matters to me at this point. Wings only. I’m all in.

In it to win it.


Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/27/13 at 04:08 PM ET

Since71's avatar

The 1 point heard round the world.

Posted by Since71 from Bucharest, Romania on 04/27/13 at 04:09 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Just win.

LET’S GO RED WINGS !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 04/27/13 at 04:17 PM ET

BC's avatar

Here’s to 22.

Here’s to Half Pint and her pretty blind sister staring at those eight year commitments and saying “WTF?”

Here come the fun s**t!

Posted by BC on 04/27/13 at 04:17 PM ET

hockeychic's avatar

I BELIEVE!

Will miss the LB tonight due to previous plans. Yikes, RSV!  Will be watching the game late tonight on DVR.

Let’s do this. 

Here’s to 22!

Let’s go RED WINGS!!!!

Posted by hockeychic from Denver, CO on 04/27/13 at 04:51 PM ET

redxblack's avatar

Wearing my NOTLD T-shirt and lucky red wings cap. Drinking to commence around 6pm.

Posted by redxblack from Akron Ohio on 04/27/13 at 04:52 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Dougie says he is ready.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/27/13 at 04:55 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Posted by monkey from Fear and Loathing on 04/27/13 at 04:55 PM ET

However I am betting that will not be enough toilet paper.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/27/13 at 04:55 PM ET

Primis's avatar

However I am betting that will not be enough toilet paper.

Posted by monkey from Fear and Loathing on 04/27/13 at 04:55 PM ET

Got some red and white corn cobs?

Posted by Primis on 04/27/13 at 04:58 PM ET

monkey's avatar

However I am betting that will not be enough toilet paper.

And where’s the Febreze?

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/27/13 at 04:58 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Two hours ‘til game time.

Just win.

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 04/27/13 at 04:59 PM ET

Primis's avatar

Just in case you guys need any reminder of why Dallas is America’s toilet and needs flushing so badly:

Skate to throat.  Press.  Decapitate.
Playoffs.

Posted by Primis on 04/27/13 at 05:10 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

And, as of fifteen minutes ago, I’ve been banned at Hockey Wilderness by Pinky.  Now I can go to the Padres game and begin my evening of ignoring everything and everyone until I get back to my hovel.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 04/27/13 at 05:40 PM ET

behind the net in G.R.'s avatar

And, as of fifteen minutes ago, I’ve been banned at Hockey Wilderness by Pinky.  Now I can go to the Padres game and begin my evening of ignoring everything and everyone until I get back to my hovel.
Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 04/27/13 at 05:40 PM ET

That should be another medal for your Dress Whites.

Posted by behind the net in G.R. on 04/27/13 at 05:47 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

That should be another medal for your Dress Whites.

You are correct, sir.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 04/27/13 at 05:48 PM ET

monkey's avatar

And, as of fifteen minutes ago, I’ve been banned at Hockey Wilderness by Pinky.  Now I can go to the Padres game and begin my evening of ignoring everything and everyone until I get back to my hovel.

What a troll.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/27/13 at 06:00 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

Alright bitches. I’m out of here.  I’ll be silent like a, yep, whore in church until late tonight.  Please, baby Jesus, please…

—Let the Wings win tonite.
—Let the Dive lay waste to the Ingalls sisters

And let Herm kick the shit out of the bar exam tomorrow.  They have lawyers in Peru?

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 04/27/13 at 06:03 PM ET

monkey's avatar

They have lawyers in Peru?

“Down in the southernmost reaches of Mexico”

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/27/13 at 06:04 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

And, as of fifteen minutes ago, I’ve been banned at Hockey Wilderness by Pinky.  Now I can go to the Padres game and begin my evening of ignoring everything and everyone until I get back to my hovel.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 04/27/13 at 05:40 PM ET

bwahahahahahahaha

... what a troll:

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/27/13 at 06:05 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Hola, diecinueve. I’m sneaking a post while the better half shops. LB is conflicting with weekend away. Somehow “romantic weekend” means shopping but no hockey.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/27/13 at 06:06 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Oh Helm, still almost an hour to go!

Just win.

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 04/27/13 at 06:06 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Shopping?  I call shenanigans.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/27/13 at 06:07 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com