Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Want A Cup Of Joe?

Updated at 0141 15 Feb Carrier Standard Time: Herm asked in the comments below if I have a comment regarding a certain player I won’t type the name of who currently resides and plays in a certain pisspot of a town south of the border.  No comment now. No comment tomorrow or ever until providence delivers that big horse to our door.  I’ve jinxed so much for so long.  No. I won’t say it.  But, please, Tick Tock…just this once. Get Dombrowski on the phone if you have to. There. That’s all I’m gonna say about Rick Nash.

Win or lose tonite against the Original Bubba, one thing can’t be disputed: no Red Wing team has ever been as dominant at Joe Louis Arena as this team is right now, or has been this season.  Back when the 19 was just a gleam in the eyes of sinister bastards like RWBill and the elusive Gramps, the Joe was a house of sin.  Poor pathetic little sisters like St. Louis and Denver, Nashville and San Jose (remember when they couldn’t win a damn thing in our Manger?) feared the Joe because they knew they’d leave soiled and violated. 

The last few years saw a change in that, though.  In dark corners of The Hasek we talked amongst ourselves and whispered the bad things. We wondered about motivation and grit and, ugh, leadership…as if we know a damn thing about what it takes to lead a hockey team. Oh, don’t get all redolent on me.  We all talked about it, and I probably spewed that garbage more than most. We wondered about The Swede and our Uncle Mike.  The last two years the Wings won more than they lost at home but big frigging deal.  Plenty of teams win more than they lose at home.

But the Wings haven’t dominated at the Joe like baby Jesus promised us they would.  Last year Detroit won 21 games at home. An interesting number considering what they’ll try to accomplish tonite…in February.  Think about that. Detroit goes for their 21st straight victory with two months left in the regular season. The streak itself would equal the number of games they won at home last year: period.  ‘09/10? 25 wins.  23 already this year.  27 home wins the year before that.  A number this year’s team should surpass no later than early, early March. 

Something’s going on with this team, this year. Krupa, with his vocabulary, noticed it yesterday and wrote about it in between sonnets and Latin classes.  In yet another article that has me warily wondering if maybe he can’t be coined the new Anti-Digger, Krupa tells us this might be Detroit deciding getting booed in their own barn is just not the Wing way.

But the will to please their fans, or, at least not to hear their displeasure, merely underlined an imperative realization. To play deeper into the playoffs, the Red Wings had to correct their problems at home.

There it is.  Oh, dealing with the boos sucks I suppose.  Although when the drive home takes you to million dollar mansions I kinda think the displeasure of the fan base is softened a bit.  No, Krupa nailed it when he told us the real reason:  if glory is to rest where we know it belongs, then winning at home is the only sure-fired recipe.  Home ice advantage. Not just in Round 1 or 2.  But 3 and then, by God, 4.  You want San Jose again?  Nifty. I’d like that too.  But I want them at the Joe when it matters the most.  Bow down to Gordie before you take that ice for Game 7, Joe.  Bow, bitch.

Streak or no streak.  Home ice all the way through is the ultimate goal.  8 wins at home in the postseason and we’re talking a real strong parade possibility.  10 and you can pack your coolers for a long, blissful day in downtown Hockeytown around 10 June.  Home ice is what we need and it’s the decree that rules all others.

Here’s a few other ditties, just to show you I pay attention:

Hank Zetterberg can go scoreless every game though mid-April. I don’t care.  He can float and he can coast.  Back check if he feels like it.  Shoot twice a game, all from 20 feet out. I don’t care.  I don’t care as long as Playoff Hank shows up when he’s supposed to.  I think he’s earned that.  I think he’s earned that benefit of the doubt.  I know what February does to us. I get it.  We stress, no matter what. Best record in the league. Greatest display of home dominance in hockey history.  Best team defense we’ve seen in three years.  Best goaltending we’ve seen since 2002 and probably even before that. But we’ll bitch because it’s all we know to do in February. The playoffs are too far away and too much can go wrong.  We were born to stress and stress we shall.  But until Henrik Zetterberg proves to me that he doesn’t have what it takes to lead this team when it matters the most, I’m inclined to cut him some slack.

Tick Tock Kenny Holland is not going to deal for a backup goaltender. Not now. Not in two weeks and, get this, not in two years.  Joey MacDonald’s your backup goalie for the long-term future.  If 15 million’s the number Holland has to spend at the deadline (and I saw that somewhere but have no link or any idea if it’s accurate. I may have dreamt it) not a cent is going toward a goaltender.  He needs a sniper and he knows it.  I’m still thinking it’s Selanne. 

Finally, compared to special teams performance the identity of our backup goalie is a frigging speck in the milky way that it is the brain of one Michael Ophelius Babcock.  If that power play doesn’t get going and I mean going at a clip that sends sick chills down the spines of potential playoff enemies, nothing’s gonna matter anyway.  I don’t care what Boston did last year with their garbage power play.  The Wings are built to make dirty teams pay dearly.  Guys are gonna get run and the man-games lost are gonna be disgusting come May if power play goals don’t start becoming the norm instead of the exception.

It’s a Live Blog, bitches. And we’re running it way early so Primis and JJ can start anew.  You know the kids get scared when mom and dad are fighting.

21’s a nice number but flip that fucher around so we can let the puppies loose on Woodward.

 

 

 

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Comments

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RWBill's avatar

Geezo, Chief, you missed the game already, it’s over.  Damn International Date Line and Persian Electronic Warfare.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 02/14/12 at 06:21 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

Effin A sailor.
Fair winds and calm seas Master Chief.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 02/14/12 at 06:22 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Guys are gonna get run and the man-games lost are gonna be disgusting come May if power play goals don’t start becoming the norm instead of the exception.

Amen, preacherman.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 02/14/12 at 06:22 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

LOVE Kurt Vonnegut - thanks for posting that!
Posted by redxblack from Akron Ohio on 02/14/12 at 02:26 PM ET

Breakfast of Champions!  Here’s to Kilgore Trout’s anus, and Dougie’s.  And my cat’s.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 02/14/12 at 06:25 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Hola, Master Chief.  I promised I’d toast you and your shipmates with a Davalos Tequila:

There are good ships,
and there are wood ships,
The ships that sail the sea.
But the best ships, are friendships,
And may they always be.

Regs, OT, or SO, Wings.  Just get the win anyway you can.  Definitely need more real estate between us and the rest of the Central.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 02/14/12 at 06:27 PM ET

BrendonR's avatar

Time to quietly make some history.  Lets just hope that Rick Nash throws on Sportscenter after the BBB’s beat the BJ’s to see a certain cap space-having, Cup-contending, Top 6 winger-needing team do it.

Posted by BrendonR on 02/14/12 at 06:35 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Selanne!  Hell of an idea, can still skate, can bury the puck, probably retire if won a Cup and leave room for the Wings up and coming forwards for next year, or if Detroit is his Fountain of Youth he’d sign for another year with a home town discount.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 02/14/12 at 06:37 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Great post, Master Chief and you are soooooooooooo right about the power play.

But for now, through the angst of February (and March), let’s just get 2 points each game, one game at a time, however it happens, whatever it takes.  And believe.

And yes, 12 sounds even better than 21.

LET’S GO RED WINGS !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 02/14/12 at 06:37 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

Not one word on Nash, Chief?

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 02/14/12 at 06:39 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Yeah about 3 years ago I thought Nash would eventually get tired of that career sink-hole in Columbus and end up in Detroit.  I’m not worried if his motivation may have been lacking, whose isn’t there? He’s been lied to and misled.

Carries a huge price tag.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 02/14/12 at 06:41 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

Carries a huge price tag.

Dude’s putting up 65+ points a season in friggin Columbus, with Antoine Vermette and Tyler Devereaux by his side. I’d tap that.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 02/14/12 at 06:46 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

Saw the update. Shutting up now.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 02/14/12 at 06:48 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

Not one word on Nash, Chief?

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 02/14/12 at 04:39 PM ET

Shut that whore mouth Herm.  Then see above. I edited the lead and that’s the last time I’ll type that name until he’s wearing Red and White.  No more mentions. Period.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 02/14/12 at 06:48 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Updated at 0141 15 Feb Carrier Standard Time: Herm asked in the comments below if I have a comment regarding a certain player I won’t type the name of who currently resides and plays in a certain pisspot of a town south of the border.  No comment now. No comment tomorrow or ever until providence delivers that big horse to our door.  I’ve jinxed so much for so long.  No. I won’t say it.  But, please, Tick Tock…just this once. Get Dombrowski on the phone if you have to. There. That’s all I’m gonna say about Rick Nash.

Heh.  I’m just gonna eat popcorn and watch Tick Tock conjure up his voodoo.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 02/14/12 at 06:49 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

As good as this years Wings are, the home record of 1995-96 will be very hard to beat.   

36–3–2 being better than that will take some doing. we would need to go almost as good as this 20 game win streak at home 16-1-0 just to tie, but winning out for the rest of the season, possible?

I’m a wings fan. all my dreams are of seasons where the Wings go 82-0-0 regular season and playoffs of 16-0 and do this for 25 years straight, the days of little gary are but a distant nightmare, and the Cup resides forever in Hockey Town. The Joe has been declared, A National Historic Landmark, the Fox Sports Detroit Girls are all Red Heads feeding me grapes while I… but i digress, nobody wants to know what my dreams are like.

As much as winning tonight and extending the streak, I think Uncle Mike says it best; “Well I really like the points, more than any winning streak”.  Yup, me also. I want the points. Don’t care much about the streak, ‘cept it means more points.

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 02/14/12 at 06:52 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Dallas has allowed at least one power-play goal in three straight road games (5-for-10 on the penalty-kill).

DET will fix the Star’s PK problems for sure.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 02/14/12 at 06:54 PM ET

Rdwings28's avatar

hmmm…..
in 2002 the Patriots lost in the Super Bowl, puppies and shiny firetrucks on Woodward in June
2008, Patriots lost in the Superbowl, confetti, babies, and first Euro captain to hoist Lord Stanley
2012 Patriots lose in the Super Bowl…..........

and a Valentine Poem

Roses are red,
don’t grow on a vine,
love every bone in yer body,
especially mine.

Posted by Rdwings28 on 02/14/12 at 07:01 PM ET

SYF's avatar

...the Fox Sports Detroit Girls are all Red Heads feeding me grapes while I…

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 02/14/12 at 04:52 PM ET

Well, don’t leave us hanging with dirty thoughts and naughty ideas, Yooper.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 02/14/12 at 07:09 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

Even with this impressive home streak teams are still nipping at our heels, how??? HOW!?!?!?!

Posted by pgoody on 02/14/12 at 07:10 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

I have a feeling that Ott is going to piss us all off in the worst way…

Posted by pgoody on 02/14/12 at 07:15 PM ET

Sullyosis's avatar

But we’ll bitch because it’s all we know to do in February.

So I don’t have to take the things JJ and Primis and Garth say to each other too seriously?

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 02/14/12 at 07:17 PM ET

Sullyosis's avatar

Then I read this bit at the end:

And we’re running it way early so Primis and JJ can start anew.  You know the kids get scared when mom and dad are fighting.

and thought: “That dirty sailor sunnuvabitch stole my joke.”

Good on ya, Chief. Now hear this.

I originally wasn’t going to be able to watch this game because my Dad was making the 1.5 hr drive from the smelter where he works to help me with the 1970 Dodge Dart I own, get’er going again. He can’t make the trip because it’s snowing. Oh yes, it’s fuching snowing in the desert where he is, where I am and surely in between. Snowing in the fuching desert has to be a record of some kind for us here. The Hockey Gods are showing me: today is a good day for records.

Enjoy the game bitches, I know I will because I can watch live now.

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 02/14/12 at 07:22 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

Sully, if anybody takes what I say seriously, they need to have their head examined.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 02/14/12 at 07:24 PM ET

Sullyosis's avatar

in 2002 the Patriots lost in the Super Bowl, puppies and shiny firetrucks on Woodward in June

Posted by Rdwings28 on 02/14/12 at 05:01 PM ET

Are you sure? Because no they f***ing didn’t.

They lost in 97 I think though…

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 02/14/12 at 07:26 PM ET

SYF's avatar

1970 Dodge Dart.

This thing?  I envy you, mister.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 02/14/12 at 07:27 PM ET

Sullyosis's avatar

Sully, if anybody takes what I say seriously, they need to have their head examined.
Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 02/14/12 at 05:24 PM ET

Just a booked a Dr.‘s appt to get my head examined!

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 02/14/12 at 07:29 PM ET

Sullyosis's avatar

Posted by SYF from a “Bron-Y-Aur Stomp” on 02/14/12 at 05:27 PM ET

THA’T JUST LIKE MINE! Yes, sublime green with the bumblebee stripe and rallye wheels. I don’t have the scoops though, but the hood is black to match the vinyl top. Fuching. Love. Absolutely love that car.

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 02/14/12 at 07:31 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Mine is this, Sully:

And I’m a GM guy.  But generally, I’m a huge fan of all of the Classic American muscle cars from the Big Three.  I’ve learned to just appreciate them for their places in history.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 02/14/12 at 07:48 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

Absolutely love that car.

How could ya not?
I remember my Gramma’s dart, if ya lifted the floor mat ya could see through the floorboards.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 02/14/12 at 07:48 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

1970 Dodge Dart.

I owned a ‘70’s Dodge Dart. not as nice as yours though. mine was solid dark blue, with a vinyl top had the 198 cu in it. nice family car. Dark blue cloth seats I think.

This car does not appear in my Red Wing dreams I have. 

The current vehicle that appears is the tricked out Ram Truck

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 02/14/12 at 07:57 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Even with this impressive home streak teams are still nipping at our heels, how??? HOW!?!?!?!

Posted by pgoody on 02/14/12 at 05:10 PM ET

Playing like shit on the road is how.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 02/14/12 at 08:01 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

...the Fox Sports Detroit Girls are all Red Heads feeding me grapes while I…

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 02/14/12 at 04:52 PM ET

Noted….I’ll be back….

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 02/14/12 at 08:11 PM ET

SYF's avatar

...the Fox Sports Detroit Girls are all Red Heads feeding me grapes while I…

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 02/14/12 at 04:52 PM ET

Noted….I’ll be back….

Posted by 42jeff from Minot, North Dakota on 02/14/12 at 06:11 PM ET

No, you’re not.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 02/14/12 at 08:16 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

Posted by SYF

there is another girl i will only ever see in my dreams

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 02/14/12 at 08:21 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Carrier Standard Time:
21’s a nice number but flip that fucher around so we can let the puppies loose on Woodward.

Evenin‘ Bitches.  Thanks Master Chief. You have your own time zone. Me likey.

Let’s Roll.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 02/14/12 at 08:27 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Uncle Mike says it best; “Well I really like the points, more than any winning streak”.

Nothing else matters.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 02/14/12 at 08:37 PM ET

SYF's avatar

You have your own time zone. Me likey.

Let’s Roll.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 02/14/12 at 06:27 PM ET

It’s similar to a cruise - passengers who take onshore excursions at their ports-of-call are on “ship time” so they don’t miss the ship’s embark.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 02/14/12 at 08:37 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

No, you’re not.

Posted by SYF from a “Bron-Y-Aur Stomp” on 02/14/12 at 06:16 PM ET


Bravo good sir

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 02/14/12 at 08:42 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Absolutely love that car.

My Dad used to commute from Marine City to Detroit everyday.  He used up cars fast.  I remember when I was 5, he came home with a purple Duster.  Just saying.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 02/14/12 at 08:46 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

So show of hands here…who has seen Doomsday Preppers and who thinks they’re nuts?

Now…who here has seen Doomsday Preppers…thinks they’re nuts…and took notes?

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 02/14/12 at 08:48 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com