Abel to Yzerman

Abel to Yzerman

Uncle Mike? Enough With The Shenanigans

03/04/2013 at 10:23am EST

Mike Babcock has taken the most dynamic hockey player ever invented and shackled him. Pavel Datsyuk, who digs Russia and probably almost stayed there when Gary wouldn't let him play here, is likely pricing dachas as we speak. I'm no Tolstoy, or even a Krupa, but I can tell you that "dacha" is Russian for, "a place I can go and laugh like child instead of try to swallow my own tongue every time I see 11 and 8 on either side of me, men who skate like fat eggs with hands like ugly shovels made of a mixture of wool and oatmeal."

Mike?

What the fuch are you doing, exactly?

This is not a team that is going to spread scoring over four lines. It's just not. But if it was? How do you reconcile putting, literally, the two most offensively challenged players on either side of Pavel Datsyuk. Got it. We got it. We know you're trying to "light a fire" under...Cleary, I guess? He's fire-less, Mike. Seriously. He's not going to get any better. And Abdelkader? Jesus, man. He's a mucker and we all know it. He's the very definition of a fringe 3rd, easy 4th liner. Tatar, Anderrson (one r or 2? I just don't know)...even Tootoo has better hands. Honestly, 22 impressed me yesterday. He's looking very offensively comfortable.

Why NOT play Datsyuk with Tatar. Holy hell that kid looks good. He's a frigging whistling teapot every shift. Put him with Datsyuk? It's too easy, it would seem. Yes, it would seem...which is what has all of us scratching our heads. He (Uncle Mike) has got to have a plan, a reason for this. He must, right?

Datsyuk had a goal and an assist on 17 Feb against Walnut Grove and the Ingalls sisters. Prior to that he'd scored in his four previous games. He was as hot as any player in the NHL and the Wings were playing, largely .500 hockey...as they are now. Since then, starting the 19th? 1 goal his last 7 games. 0 points at all his last 3.

Frankly, I don't give two shits if anyone feels I'm attacking Babcock. And if you attack my pharmacist's opinion in the comments, I'll attack you right back but hide behind self-deprecating sarcasm and childish short answers instead of engaging in any form of intelligent give-and-take. That's just how I roll.

I am attacking him. Point blank. This is stupid and, yes, it's wasteful.

I'm guessing Abdelkader and Cleary play harder-edged games than Tatar and Andersson, better forecheckers and such. That's why the young kids who actually, you know, score played 93 seconds in the third period. Honestly, Babcock had to be thinking that in a close, low-scoring, important game like yesterday's? The safer play was having two veteran grinders out there who have been in pressure situations before.

Veterans who've been through playoff wars, won Cups, lost Cups, don't make mistakes in high-temp situations, right? Right Nick, Big E?

Just checking.

For the record, those were two bad breaks. Bottom line. I've been happy with Kronwall and really happy with Ericsson. I'm not happy with Mike Babcock.

This was a two-game experiment that should have ended long ago. Is it as stupid as putting, say, Johan Franzen on the penalty kill? Ha, ha. LOLzzz. Not THAT fuching stupid, but close.

Put Pavel Datsyuk back on a line where he can contribute. You look like a dumbass, Mike.

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Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977. No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y. Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation. There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature. Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that.

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