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Abel to Yzerman

Speak Too Soon, Shane? Yeah, We Think So Too

“Bryzgalov is probably the best player in this series”

—Shane Doan

Woops.

Shane, a nifty gift of a ditty bit of advice before this gets any uglier:  STFU.

That “best player in this series”?  Yeah, he’s given up ten goals over the last two games against Detroit that meant a damn thing.  Bury this mystique please.  Dig a hole, toss it in, piss on it and bury it for good.  I’ve read a few comments today, saying he’s not going to be giving up those goals too often, that Bryzgalov is something we should fear, a menace.  And that’s based on what, exactly?  The guy had a chance at history in his own backyard last year and he gave up a touchdown.  Two straight garbage outings and we’re still scared?  I fear the playoffs and all that they bring with them. But guess what?  He’s no better than any other goalie still playing hockey right now.  And that includes ours. 

 

Here’s a few observations from last evening:

How creative.  Both Keith Jones and Jeremy “Douche Dinghy” Roenick picked the Coyotes last night.  Shocking.  Both of those tools made a career of losing to the Wings in a variety of different uniforms.  What exactly did they base those predictions on? Gut feelings, I suppose.  Bitterness and bad memories, plus a whole shitload of hope is more like it. 

OLN commentators, plus the ESPN anchor talking to Barry Melrose today, all said Detroit was “flat” the first period.  Really? I didn’t see it that way. It took them a while to get any sustained pressure, but the Wing PK was amazing and so was Howard.  And when we weren’t shorthanded it looked to me like the legs were moving.  But I do admit this:  nothing got them going like the frigging serial killer.  Holy Hell.  We’ve got ourselves a new hometown hero and tell me that last night didn’t cement the big psycho’s love for our town.  He may never leave.
 
“Todd Ber-Tu-zzi” again and again.  Just awesome.  And you think it’s farfetched that this team wants to win it for him?  Really?  You don’t think they love this guy?  He screwed up and he’s paid the price.  I believe the story I read over the summer that it’s never even been mentioned in the Wing room.  But they all know the demons this bastard’s been dealing with. You better believe a few of them know what a bitch Steve Moore was before he became North America’s martyr.  Bertuzzi avenged his teammate, but his emotions got the best of him.  You think Kris Draper doesn’t respect what he did?  Think about the circumstances and what led to that “attack” before you answer.  I’m betting his teammates love that born-again bonecrusher.  Yeah, there’s motivation to win it for him I’m betting.

I guess you remember when Pavel Datsyuk was considered a playoff disappearing act?  It was the troll’s refrain back in ‘08.  No, actually, “how’s unemployment treating you?” was the real refrain.  Datsyuk’s alleged playoff weaknesses were a close second.  Anyone want to discuss that now?  8 frigging shots through two, a mucker’s goal and more moves than Darren Garcia in lockdown.  With 15 to go, he’s my early leader for Conn Smythe.  How close did it all come to just ending last night with that skate blade just barely missing his throat?
 
Yes, there is a switch.  And we hate it, but they damn sure know when to turn it on.  Would it be better if they soared through December and January, tore it up from February through March then entered the playoffs on a ferocious tear?  I guess.  But we’ve seen that before.  Like in ‘96.  Like we said yesterday, a three seed accompanied by a quiet confidence is just as good. 

This Phoenix team had no business on the same ice as the Wings last April, but Detroit had nothing left in the tank.  The whole deal last year was just too much.  Too many injuries to overcome.  Too much emphasis on just getting in the playoffs much less succeeding once we got there.  Uncle Mike promised us today that staying out of the box will be a focus and I believe him.  The 2nd and 3rd periods, after the penalty parades, Detroit controlled that game as only our Wings can.  Phoenix has two threats and one was exposed last night.  Ten goals in two games.  Over. Rated.  And the other is a circus freak. 

Screw Shane Doan.  Let him run around and make his idiotic faces from the bench after yet another foiled opportunity.  Detroit’s dealt with him for twenty years when his name was Pronger or Lindros. He was Derian Hatcher or big tough Gary Roberts.  Maybe he was Mike Keane or even little prancing Paul Kariya.  Whatever.  Individuals have never been able to beat this team.  Ever.  It doesn’t happen.  The tough guys run themselves ragged. The princesses like Thid get rattled by the likes of #40.  Shane Doan can not beat this team by himself and he’s all they got.

Was that a sniper’s goal from the midget backbiting pimp?  Oh. Yes it was.  And, by golly, the glory that would accompany a little hot streak from our Oompa Loompa.  And, say fellows, was that a Franzen playoff goal?  Why, yes.  Yes it was.  And didn’t we need that.  Oh my hadn’t we fretted over that.  No need.  And you know the best part?  Guess who’s name wasn’t mentioned a single time by Stevie’s best pal Darren Pang last night?  Not once did we hear the words “Henrik Zetterberg.”  I’m serious. They didn’t even say his name. No mention that he was out.  Nada.  You may consider that to be downright inept, and you’re right.  But it’s a good sign when the league’s second-best all around player (and you know who the best is) rests his knee and his absence isn’t even noticed.

Rest Hank.  Rest him I say.  Rest him Saturday and whatever day the troll commish tells us we’re allowed to play after that.  No hyperbaric chamber necessary, thanks.  Just rest until Round 2, Game 1.

15 to 12 bitches. Only 1 down, but it was a damn good one

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Comments

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perfection's avatar

it’s funny, because when I read the other day that “Bryzgalov is probably the best player in this series”, I actually pointed out to my girlfriend that he isn’t even the best RUSSIAN in the series. Point proven.

Posted by perfection from LaLaLand on 04/14/11 at 02:54 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

And from the darkness of early evening half way around the world a Tomahawk missile is launched right up Doan’s derierre.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/14/11 at 02:55 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Aloha, Sailor.  Sure wish you were Stateside already. 

Yep.  It’s a damn fine start but I’m already looking forward to Saturday’s ever-important Game Two.  I don’t know how to have fun while the playoffs are on.  I just want the next game in the WIN column for the Wings.

And, yeah, rest Zata.  He’s awesome on the road games anyway.

Posted by SYF from Zata's Epic Viking Beard on 04/14/11 at 03:06 PM ET

Avatar

“Bryzgalov is probably the best player in this series”

-Shane Doan-

“Shane Doan is Sloth from Goonies.”

-Me-

My point is, Bryzgalov may be good, and Shane is definitely fugly, but let’s not get carried away with our comments.


3 left till Phoenix transforms back into Winnipeg.

Posted by Kyran from Commerce, MI on 04/14/11 at 03:10 PM ET

WICNMKYzerman's avatar

I don’t see how you think Datsyuk is better than Bryzgolov.  I mean all Datsyuk does is make people look stupid on both ends of the ice, score game changing goals, steal the puck from anyone he wants, carry his team, and he doesn’t even get penalties.  Maybe you didn’t see Bryzgolov saved almost 90% of the shots that came his way last night?  Plus, Shane Doan is really good at getting air humped by Abdlekader behind the net.  You guys are such Wings Slappies.

Posted by WICNMKYzerman from Detroit, MI on 04/14/11 at 03:17 PM ET

HockeytownOverhaul's avatar

laughing my muddafawkin’ ass off Chief, “Thiiiiiid”


*emphathith added

Posted by HockeytownOverhaul on 04/14/11 at 03:20 PM ET

bobinalaska's avatar

Posted by perfection from Chicago on 04/14/11 at 12:54 PM ET

I. Love. Your. Avatar. It’s from the first Wings game I ever saw in person, and as a goalie… just fantastic. It’s complete shite that he got called for tripping on that play, but it had no effect on the outcome of the game, so whatever.

Posted by bobinalaska from Fairbanks, Palinistan on 04/14/11 at 03:21 PM ET

WICNMKYzerman's avatar

Seriously, I’m positive Doan’s only regret from last night was not taking advantage of chances…

Like the chance he had to swing his mouth around while #8 was jack hammering the back of his head.  F*CK I hate Doan.

Posted by WICNMKYzerman from Detroit, MI on 04/14/11 at 03:21 PM ET

FranzensMouthguard's avatar

Lately, every time I read a post by the Chief, all I can see is this guy:

Posted by FranzensMouthguard from Chicago, IL on 04/14/11 at 03:25 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

How creative.  Both Keith Jones and Jeremy “Douche Dinghy” Roenick picked the Coyotes last night.  Shocking.  Both of those tools made a career of losing to the Wings in a variety of different uniforms.  What exactly did they base those predictions on? Gut feelings, I suppose.  Bitterness and bad memories, plus a whole shitload of hope is more like it. 

Chief, you take the words right out of my mouth.  Keep on preachin’!

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 04/14/11 at 03:36 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

“Todd Ber-Tu-zzi”

And you think it’s farfetched that this team wants to win it for him?

There is that Sailor - - but there is the other side of that coin too.

At one time Bert was one of the very best power forwards in this league.

Don’t you think that the love he is getting in Motown doesn’t make him more determined to perform?  And he damn sure has the talent, or did have it, in spades.

I think it is Bert that will deliver for the team, just as much as the team will for him.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/14/11 at 03:42 PM ET

calquake's avatar

How close did it all come to just ending last night with that skate blade just barely missing his throat?

Chief, you wouldn’t believe the size of the diamond I created when I saw that happen.

Posted by calquake on 04/14/11 at 03:44 PM ET

Sullyosis's avatar

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/14/11 at 01:42 PM ET

Couldn’t agree with you more, Jeff.  This Bert Experience, or Bertsperience, if you will, carries a circular pattern.

He’s clearly willing to elevate his game for the playoffs this year moreso than any other year (he’s never been thought of as a “playoff” guy), and the crowd loves it.  But we always make reference to how Bert is one of those players who’s overall play is affected by his confidence level more than pretty much any other player we can think of.  And the crowd showing him some love only boosts his confidence, which helps his play and there you have it, a perfectly circular function of atrocity the likes of which Mamoud Ahmadijejad would be envious.

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 04/14/11 at 04:12 PM ET

Sullyosis's avatar

Who is?  Damn, meant to put in whose.  Twas a long night for me, what with the postgame festivities.

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 04/14/11 at 04:13 PM ET

Rdwings28's avatar

I sure as h*ll wouldn’t nickname my goalie…......“BREEEEEZY”. Funny

Posted by Rdwings28 on 04/14/11 at 04:48 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Do you have tickets to this years games, Sully?

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 04/14/11 at 04:56 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

I sure as h*ll wouldn’t nickname my goalie…......“BREEEEEZY”. Funny

Posted by Rdwings28 on 04/14/11 at 02:48 PM ET


I’ve always thought the same thing.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 04/14/11 at 04:58 PM ET

Primis's avatar

Doan would be a 3rd liner on a LOT of other playoff teams.

That’s all you need to know about Puh-hoe-nicks and their “star”, right there.

Wings are very much in Bryz’s head.  You saw it on the 3rd goal.  Bryz may be the new Turco for the Wings and they don’t respect him… as you saw by them firing high again and again.  Franzen’s goal?  Replica of a shot he tried earlier to the same corner that Bryzgalov clearly had trouble handling.  So Mule shot there again… goal.

Wings don’t fear Brygalov, and he clearly fears them now after last night.

Posted by Primis on 04/14/11 at 05:02 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

Bertuzzi changed his game after the Moore incident.  but there was more than one option of HOW he could change his game.  he simply tried to play the same game, minus the physical play…and it didn’t work very well for him.

once again the Organ-i-zation has helped a player find his BEST game.  it took a few years for Bertuzzi to buy in, but it has happened.  I have a sneaking suspicion somebody - possibly Draper - took him aside and said “look Bert, here’s what we need from you.” 

think about it.  out of nowhere Bertuzzi gets in two fights in one game.  then game one of the playoffs he gets in another one, and the Wings (and fans) are energized.  I have a lot of trouble believing that was simply just chance, and was not a completely intentional change in Bertuzzi’s game that was directed from someone besides Bertuzzi.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 04/14/11 at 05:03 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

by the way, my point about Bertuzzi’s game isn’t simply about fighting.  it’s about energy, and playing with that physical edge.

I have a feeling that the way he’s playing - i.e. more physical - is going to result in a confidence boost and a comfort on the ice he hasn’t had in a long time…which will also result in him putting the puck in the net.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 04/14/11 at 05:05 PM ET

Primis's avatar

http://www.azcentral.com/members/Blog/DanBickley/124970

Oh.  My.  GOD.

So, a plea to all Red Wings fans living in the Valley:

If you must go to the games in Arizona, please wear white.  We don’t want outsiders thinking we can’t sell out playoff games.  After all we’ve been through - from bankruptcy hearings to relocation threats - the last thing we need is more national embarrassment.

RED.  THEM.  OUT.  How pathetic.

Can you imagine this article existing anywhere else?

Posted by Primis on 04/14/11 at 05:08 PM ET

mrfluffy's avatar

Bert’s play last night, and the game before, reminded me of a guy who played with the Wings a few years ago. I think he wore the number 17.

Posted by mrfluffy from Long Beach on 04/14/11 at 05:10 PM ET

edillac's avatar

Bert was turning it up in last years playoffs also,
this time he wants it even more and the team can use that to make it happen

Posted by edillac from isolation on 04/14/11 at 05:11 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

Bert’s play last night, and the game before, reminded me of a guy who played with the Wings a few years ago. I think he wore the number 17.

Posted by mrfluffy from Long Beach on 04/14/11 at 03:10 PM ET

Doug Brown?  wink

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 04/14/11 at 05:16 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

RED.  THEM.  OUT.  How pathetic.
Can you imagine this article existing anywhere else?
Posted by Primis on 04/14/11 at 03:08 PM ET

They did say please. Bwahahahahaaaa.
Pa-fauxing-thetic.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 04/14/11 at 05:17 PM ET

scotts0's avatar

I don’t want to get ahead of myself, but it looks like Shane Doan is following the Rex Ryan way of sporting.  Talk out of your ass about everything hoping that something will end up being right.

Go Wings….*#$%@& Doan and that team.

Posted by scotts0 from New York on 04/14/11 at 05:18 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

Posted by Primis on 04/14/11 at 03:08 PM ET

As Servtuzzi pointed out on Twitter, this is the same bunghole who asked Red Wings fans in Phoenix to simply “stay home” last year.

http://www.azcentral.com/members/Blog/DanBickley/78269

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 04/14/11 at 05:22 PM ET

redxblack's avatar

the whole “white out” thing is so cheesy. White tshirts are the cheapest thing a person could wear. Is it any wonder that so many poorly situated teams give away white shirts on “white out” nights?

Posted by redxblack from Akron Ohio on 04/14/11 at 05:23 PM ET

SYF's avatar

http://www.azcentral.com/members/Blog/DanBickley/124970

Oh.  My.  GOD.

So, a plea to all Red Wings fans living in the Valley:

If you must go to the games in Arizona, please wear white.  We don’t want outsiders thinking we can’t sell out playoff games.  After all we’ve been through - from bankruptcy hearings to relocation threats - the last thing we need is more national embarrassment.

RED.  THEM.  OUT.  How pathetic.

Can you imagine this article existing anywhere else?

Posted by Primis on 04/14/11 at 03:08 PM ET

They gotta be shitting me.

Massive, massive barrels of FAIL.

Posted by SYF from Zata's Epic Viking Beard on 04/14/11 at 05:26 PM ET

Osrt's avatar

I think it is Bert that will deliver for the team, just as much as the team will for him.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut

Agreed with you and Sully.

That moment brought a lump to my throat. The organization has shown him a lot of love and patience and now the fans are showing him why this is his place to retire. He can scout other killers later. It’s all planned out.

If I had the time and ego I’d quote myself like Gramps, but I’m not that gangsta. When the Tuzzi debates were going back and forth, I said that we’d watch him dominate in the playoffs and score the cup winning goal, like Mac. No idea if that’ll happen, but I love that burly sonuvabitch.

Doan hit Datsyuk once on a shift and Dats ran him into the glass, on a PK shift too. I love seeing Dats pissed.

Posted by Osrt on 04/14/11 at 05:27 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

the whole “white out” thing is so cheesy. White tshirts are the cheapest thing a person could wear. Is it any wonder that so many poorly situated teams give away white shirts on “white out” nights?

Posted by redxblack from Akron Ohio on 04/14/11 at 03:23 PM ET

Especially when the road team wears white nowadays.

Before Phoenix worries about a white-out, they should worry about a show-up-during-the-regular-season-out.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 04/14/11 at 05:29 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Some how George missed this gem from Steve Schrader of the Freep. Schrader is either one of the 19 or else he cleary reads this blog and understands our abnormal psychology:

Whew. The Red Wings won.

April in the D is so much better when they do. The sun is brighter, the air is fresher, and we didn’t wake up this morning worrying about whether it’s the end of the world as we know it.

Especially when it’s two days till Game 2. That’s a lot of fretting.

So better them than us.

Let Phoenix fans wonder whether the Coyotes will ever win another game and the Wings must have Ilya Bryzgalov’s number, assuming they even care that much.


Best analysis of Game One that I’ve read

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/14/11 at 05:39 PM ET

Forlorn in VA's avatar

  I sure as h*ll wouldn’t nickname my goalie…......“BREEEEEZY”. Funny

  Posted by Rdwings28 on 04/14/11 at 02:48 PM ET


I’ve always thought the same thing.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Land of Ice and Snow on 04/14/11 at 02:58 PM ET

Because my mind works in truly strange ways, every time I hear someone refer to him as “Breezy” I hear the Covergirl slogan in my head.  “Easy, Breezy, Beautiful. Covergirl.”

So now I just call him Covergirl.

Posted by Forlorn in VA on 04/14/11 at 05:51 PM ET

John W.'s avatar

Before Phoenix worries about a white-out, they should worry about a show-up-during-the-regular-season-out.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 04/14/11 at 03:29 PM ET

Exactly.  Hypocritical bastards sure as well will take Wings fans’ money in the regular season when they are the only 1’s that will show up, but now that the bandwagoners want to come, we better stay home?  STFU.  Not even to mention that the Red Wings own 1/29th of their franchise.

Posted by John W. from a bubble wrap cocoon on 04/14/11 at 05:52 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

FWIW:

R   Todd Bertuzzi   81 g/p   16   29   45   -7   15:57 @ $44,444/pt (cap hit)

Salary:  2.250 10-11,  1.625 11-12
Cap is roughly $2/yr

R   Shane Doan   72 g/p   20   40   60   5   19:17   @ $75,925/pt (cap hit)
Salary 4.55 10-11, 4.55 11-12
Cap is 4.55/yr

aLol (tm, TTD Tyler)

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/14/11 at 05:58 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Video, Bab’s presser today. 

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/14/11 at 06:02 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

aLol (tm, TTD Tyler)
Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/14/11 at 03:58 PM ET

Doan is a racial epithet-spewing punk with a skosh of talent. Without him, last year the series went 7. With him, I’m hoping it’s over in 4 or 5.

Would love to hear an “over rated” cheer at the Joe when he’s on the ice.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/14/11 at 06:12 PM ET

Forlorn in VA's avatar

Jeff, that link is broken.

Posted by Forlorn in VA on 04/14/11 at 06:15 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

Would love to hear an “over rated” cheer at the Joe when he’s on the ice.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from Warm and sunny SoCal on 04/14/11 at 04:12 PM ET

Doan doesn’t understand four-syllable words anyway…

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 04/14/11 at 06:15 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Jeff, that link is broken.
Posted by Forlorn in VA on 04/14/11 at 04:15 PM ET

Try this:

http://video.redwings.nhl.com/videocenter/console?catid=-6&id=108544

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/14/11 at 06:23 PM ET

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Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com