Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Ready. Set. Vomit.

I don't care about bringing new fans to the game. I honestly do not give a single shit about that.  I say that because I've seen the post below and, before the bad thing happened Monday night, I read about how Game 7's are the perfect chance to reign in the fence sitters. Naturally, I've not read a single hockey-related item since Game 6.

I personally despise Game 7s more than anything ever invented in this whole world.  They are disgusting.  Oh, I suppose they're fun if you're a, I don't know, Blues fan and you stopped caring about hockey a couple months ago when your team was eliminated (again).

But you and I?  I don't know how many of these prison washroom violations we've had to endure the last twenty years but I do know what happened in '09. I know what happened against San Jose when the Wings finally decided Game 4 would be a nice night to start playing hockey. I know about Anaheim this year and I'm fully aware of the obscenity of this evening.

There were more.  Chicago, Toronto, St. Louis and Denver.  Now that's a pleasant memory, that one in '02.  But only after the fact.  Leading up to these things?

I'm not lying to you when I say I'm tempted to just skip it.  It's too hard. The dread.  Nothing inside me looks forward to this. Nothing.  I sit here and I try to imagine the way I'll feel when the Wings win, the sense of relief.  But it's like Kathy Ireland on the cover of SI in like '82. I was 14 and my feeble, innocent mind could imagine it...but those images were ruined when I somehow thought clearly enough to realize it was an impossible fantasy.

Is victory tonite like that? Impossible? Absolutely not.  50/50, I think.  But, we're not talking reality or pharmacy. We're talking the mind of an infirm man, the emotions of a child. That's what I am on Game 7 days.  I try to look ahead to 2230 EST and all I see is blackness and dead animals. 

Game 7s should not be advertised as the shiny object that will lure in the casual observer.  The casual observer has no concept of what you're going through today. None at all. 

I have no energy to provide the what-ifs.  I can't tell you I believe the Wings will win "if Zetterberg scores" or "if Howard is better than Crawford".  My views on that mean nothing and I can't even form a coherent thought. 

Some of you will say you're actually looking forward to tonite. I don't understand that. I don't understand you. I'm not judging. I'm not a judger.  I just can't comprehend anyone actually relishing this evolution.

Have a great day. 

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Comments

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monkey's avatar

I am so proud of this team.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 05/29/13 at 03:22 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

I am so proud of this team.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 05/29/13 at 04:22 PM ET

Hahahaha.  Herm?

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 05/29/13 at 03:24 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Hey, there is a game tonight.  We are heading to another Game #7 with the partner that brought us to this point.  What a season! A ticket to another Big Show, who’d of thunk it?

Time to make the most of the opportunity.  Play like Red Wings. Have no doubt, we are playing to win.  Throw what you have at us Lil Gary, we are playing to win. Mick Magoo and his merry band of Zebras?...bring it, we are playing to win.  Stress?...pour me another cup, I got a game to win. Why do the Wings find themselves in this situation?...because they thrive on it. They play to win.

So grab your best Shiners Bock, martini, rum or yes, even a Pina Colada, because tonight will be glorious.  As a wise man named Dougie pointed out… “....there is absolutely no downside.”

Just play to win.

Let’s Go Red Wings !!!!!

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, SCP Round #2….whore style on 05/29/13 at 03:15 PM ET

^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
This! This! This! Bitches!

Thank you, Rummie!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 05/29/13 at 03:30 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

I am so proud of this team.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 05/29/13 at 04:22 PM ET

Shit starter eh? wink

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 05/29/13 at 03:32 PM ET

HockeytownOverhaul's avatar

Pina Colada’s are kryptonite to this team and take as long as THC to get out of your system.  NO pina colada’s.

Posted by HockeytownOverhaul on 05/29/13 at 03:32 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

I am legitimately nervous. Like, getting your driver’s license, meeting the in-laws, pregnancy test nervous.

*#$%@&.

 

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 05/29/13 at 03:32 PM ET

jsquigg's avatar

Even though it sucks that we got fuched in game 6, no matter what happens I’m proud of this team.  Uncle Mike has been brilliant thus far and I’ve got no doubt he’ll have Q baffled tonight, but it still might not be enough.  If I see O’Halloran’s dumbass out there I know it’ll come down to some miserable fuch job.  I hope the fellas win it just so there’s a chance Bettman chokes on his own spittle as his plans are ruined.  You know it’s bad when the NBA has morons blowing the whistles and they would be 10X better at officiating hockey without knowing how to skate.

As always, LGRW!!!  Beat the Cawks in their own building full of fair weather trolls who think the Red Wings achieved success by subtly interfering their way to the top.

Posted by jsquigg on 05/29/13 at 03:32 PM ET

HockeytownOverhaul's avatar

Posted by
     
    RedMenace
     
    from aboard the Crazy Train on 05/29/13 at 04:32 PM ET

I’m already through one pack of smokes and shit 3 times today.  Nervous is an understatement.

Posted by HockeytownOverhaul on 05/29/13 at 03:33 PM ET

HockeytownOverhaul's avatar

SYF, I’m not seeing anything new in my inbox, what gives brother?  I thought this was turning into a game-day tradition.

And you find the best redheads

Posted by HockeytownOverhaul on 05/29/13 at 03:40 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

YEA MOTHERFUCHERS!!!!!

Posted by pgoody on 05/29/13 at 04:05 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

And you find the best redheads

Posted by HockeytownOverhaul on 05/29/13 at 04:40 PM ET


I accept that challenge

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 05/29/13 at 04:07 PM ET

Lucce's avatar

Game se7ven, Shitago home building. Stupid fans. What could be more exciting for this during “I like our team” season.

So 4-1 Detroit.

Posted by Lucce from Kingdom of Zweden on 05/29/13 at 04:14 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

I find I’m so excited, I can barely sit still or hold a thought in my head. I think it’s the excitement only a free man can feel, a free man at the start of a long journey whose conclusion is uncertain. I hope I can make it across the border. I hope to see my friend and shake his hand. I hope the Pacific is as blue as it has been in my dreams.

I hope.

Posted by pgoody on 05/29/13 at 04:18 PM ET

SYF's avatar

SYF, I’m not seeing anything new in my inbox, what gives brother?  I thought this was turning into a game-day tradition.

And you find the best redheads

Posted by HockeytownOverhaul on 05/29/13 at 04:40 PM ET

Keep Calm and Chive On, Mutherfucher.  wink

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 05/29/13 at 05:08 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Howard had grabbed Smith’s stick and tossed it aside in frustration following the third Blackhawks goal Monday night
yikes.
Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/29/13 at 02:49 PM ET

Dude’s 2 goals do not make up for his epic brain farts. Even with his two goals, he’s a minus 3. Smith is lucky that Jimmah just threw his stick away. It probably took every thing Jimmah had not to give Smith a two handed slash that would keep him out for the rest of the playoffs.

Yeah, he’s offensively gifted. So freaking what.

And yes, I know I am
 photo dead-horse.gif

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/29/13 at 05:11 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Howard had grabbed Smith’s stick and tossed it aside in frustration following the third Blackhawks goal Monday night

Show me the video.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 05/29/13 at 05:17 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Even though it sucks that we got fuched in game 6, no matter what happens I’m proud of this team.  Uncle Mike has been brilliant thus far and I’ve got no doubt he’ll have Q baffled tonight, but it still might not be enough.  If I see O’Halloran’s dumbass out there I know it’ll come down to some miserable fuch job.  I hope the fellas win it just so there’s a chance Bettman chokes on his own spittle as his plans are ruined.  You know it’s bad when the NBA has morons blowing the whistles and they would be 10X better at officiating hockey without knowing how to skate.

As always, LGRW!!!  Beat the Cawks in their own building full of fair weather trolls who think the Red Wings achieved success by subtly interfering their way to the top.

Posted by jsquigg on 05/29/13 at 04:32 PM ET

Equally worse:  Walkom and O’Rourke.

Let’s just play hockey and see what happens.  Sip a few beers and drink down a few shots. 

All we want as Wings fans:  to be on the winning side of the scoreboard with 00:00.0 showing at the end of the third period.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 05/29/13 at 05:18 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

I am with SYF but might be a beer or 2 ahead.
Let’s just play and let the chips fall… we have our fate in our hands, its been there for 2 games now. If ya want it… take it.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 05/29/13 at 05:22 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

I have been wanting to do a bathroom like this for YEARS, and I finally got to it.  so I painted, put up a new mirror and light…


...and the last step is the wallpaper border.  oh man I can’t wait this is gonna look so good.  Home Depot matched the paint to the border EXACTLY.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/29/13 at 05:23 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Not getting many good vibes here in twister land.

Hopeful, but decidedly not optimistic.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 05/29/13 at 05:27 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Not getting many good vibes here in twister land.

Hopeful, but decidedly not optimistic.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 05/29/13 at 06:27 PM ET

I’m burning with optimism’s flame. smile

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 05/29/13 at 05:32 PM ET

hockeychic's avatar

Master Chief - I understand.  A friend of mine sent me an email this morning saying “I love Game 7s”  - ugh (he’s an Avs fan).  I love them when my team isn’t playing.  I’m already nervous. 

Yeah, my nerves are also jacked up from driving with my permit bearing daughter for an hour and a half today too…yikes.

RSV!

Just leave it all out on the ice, that’s all I ask.

LGRW!

Posted by hockeychic from Denver, CO on 05/29/13 at 05:33 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/29/13 at 06:23 PM ET

If I can ever get my panoramio working I’ll have to post pictures of my man cave

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 05/29/13 at 05:36 PM ET

Pugna Vox's avatar

I have a sixer of Pepto and a pint of raw ether. Gonna be nauseous and depraved tonight.

Posted by Pugna Vox from Idiot Out Wandering Around on 05/29/13 at 05:38 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Show me the video.
Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!
Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 05/29/13 at 06:17 PM ET

Paul was quoting Wojo’s column in the News.

Here is a quote from an AP report:

Chicago got to the front of Howard in the third period and it paid off.

Handzus was basically by himself when he scored 51 seconds into the third against a helpless Howard. Bickell wouldn’t let Detroit defenseman Brendan Smith move him away from Howard before he scored the go-ahead goal, leading to Howard taking Smith’s stick and throwing it into the corner.

http://www.foxnews.com/sports/2013/05/28/red-wings-waste-another-chance-to-beat-blackhawks-who-win-4-3-to-force-decisive/

I also read it in other sources. It happened. And Smith deserves a lot blame for this team not making the WCF in11-12 games rather than 14, if we’re lucky.

8-13-93, 11-40-51, 14-63-24, 55-52 and 35 all come to play. Yeah, even Mule. But it doesn’t mean much if 2 can’t get his head out of his ass. His teammates were supportive of him and his boneheaded plays a month ago. Apparently, that support is wearing thin. He is still making mistakes that would get him benched in Juniors. We are not talking about skill here; it is 100% mental. I doubt White would have left Handzus wide open in front of the net.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/29/13 at 05:38 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

Winning game 7s in back to back series… stat anyone?

Posted by pgoody on 05/29/13 at 05:39 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/29/13 at 06:23 PM ET

Here are some ideas for your bedroom:

 photo Fan.jpg

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/29/13 at 05:40 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

Winning game 7s in back to back series… stat anyone?

Posted by pgoody on 05/29/13 at 06:39 PM ET

http://espn.go.com/blog/nhl/post/_/id/24837/red-wings-love-them-some-game-7

Thought I almost answered my own question but alas it still remains…

Posted by pgoody on 05/29/13 at 05:42 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Winning game 7s in back to back series… stat anyone?
Posted by pgoody on 05/29/13 at 06:39 PM ET


L.G.R.W.!!!

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/29/13 at 05:45 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

Pre game festivities at my favorite “almost free” bar, SDYC. The rum is flowing and all is trending well.  I checked the Corsi #‘s and so far today Smith is error free.

Constancy is the hobgoblin…..

LGRW !!!!!

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, with 3 fingers of rum & a cigar.. on 05/29/13 at 05:47 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

Oh and Paul….. That. Is one fine looking turlet….

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, with 3 fingers of rum & a cigar.. on 05/29/13 at 05:48 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

I checked the Corsi #‘s and so far today Smith is error free.
Constancy is the hobgoblin…..
LGRW !!!!!
Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, SCP Round #2….whore style on 05/29/13 at 06:47 PM ET

If it stays that way, Detroit will be playing out here Friday and Sunday nights. You gonna make the schlepp?

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/29/13 at 05:51 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

well, CaptainD…I plan on doing some things to my bedroom, but more like this…

I suppose I can put some Winged Wheel stickers on it wink

figured I’d stick to the theme and find a redhead grin

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/29/13 at 05:53 PM ET

SYF's avatar

What I got in my room (in addition to my Yzerman whites and a generic no name Red Wings sweater).

That “Red Wings Country” street sign set me back about $85 and I can’t recall where I bought it.  I couldn’t find the other SCF Champs flags because the sports shops in this NBA-fellating town doesn’t give a crap about hockey in general and the one I really wanted was the ‘97 Flag because it’s Stevie Y’s first Cup.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 05/29/13 at 05:58 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

I’m thinking about getting a goal horn and red light and hooking them to the toilet flusher LOL

I suppose it would only be appropriate to have a pic of Sammy there too

speaking of that, did I see correctly on Twitter that he’s in the game tonight?

can he play D for Smith?

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/29/13 at 06:04 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

Blaming a series loss on a rookie isn’t exactly fair. Sure he’s made mistakes but its a team game. The lack of transition game and or turnovers in the d zone can be as much the forwards faults as the d man/ puck carriers.
Any who… I am amazingly calm before game 7… but couldn’t sit still before game 6. Let’s just play. Shift by shift as a 5 man unit. It ain’t gonna be easy but nothing worth doing right ever is.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 05/29/13 at 06:05 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

Howdy All!
I’m here, I’m in, I’m nervous, requesting a Win - Wings!

Lets Roll….........

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 05/29/13 at 06:06 PM ET

SYF's avatar

It ain’t gonna be easy but nothing worth doing right ever is.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 05/29/13 at 07:05 PM ET

This.  Ten thousand times this…because it reminds me so much of Shanny’s quote (paraphrasing here):  “You should never have to have somebody else do your job for you.”

The way to the Cup is through this game tonight and then, should we find ourselves on the other side hopping a ride to LA, there’s still the SC champs to deal with.

Let’s just play.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 05/29/13 at 06:08 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Please, please no more Smith dissing. Not tonight. The Wings will do this, or not, as a team.  I’m sure that if Jimmah threw Smith’s stick, it was in a moment of frustration - not only at Smiity, but at himself for not making that save. But that’s over. Tonight is what matters.  And we are ALL in this together.

LET’S GO RED WINGS !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 05/29/13 at 06:08 PM ET

Avatar

I am proud to follow the best franchise in pro sports.  I won’t say how long, but Toronto/Detroit 1970-Olympia first live game. 
I have never been able to relate what goes on for me leading up to this insanitiy.  Thanks Chief for explaining it.
LGRW!!!!

Posted by Jeff from CO. on 05/29/13 at 06:15 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com