Abel to Yzerman

Abel to Yzerman

Preparing To Burn Down The East

09/21/2013 at 11:50am EDT

Typically, I give the preseason very little credence. I prefer to think of it as a few games to skate around and shoot stuff at goalies, maybe bump some people hard but not hard enough to make them seriously angry. Nobody wants to get hurt and I don't want to see anyone hurt unless it's a team I despise like St. Louis. Even then, I don't want the players hurt I just want the fans to be sad because Blues fans are, without exception, dicks.

And if the Wings play poorly in the preseason? Obviously, that gives even more weight to my theory that exhibition games mean nothing.

I've changed my mind, literally in the last twenty seconds. Like a woman. Now, I believe the Wings will finish with the best record in the Eastern Conference because they've dominated the two "favorites" to the tune of 12 goals to 3 or something.

It's been a long, hot, interesting summer. So much to talk about and so many things you've discussed without the benefit of my even-keeled non-biased views. Certainly you don't expect me to recap all of it in some Malikian thesis? No.

So, here's what I'll do. I like the "stream of conscies, concious, conscio"....FUCH IT...I like to just tap where my mind takes me.

I'm glad the sad Sens fans have stopped blabbing and blabbering and whining about "Alfie" leaving. And I'll never call him "Alfie", ever. However, I vow that I'll spell his name differently every time I use it because I can never remember if it's two dd's, or two ss's or two rr's or all six.

I keep reading how Dan DeKeyser's gained all this muscle. Uncle Mike says he's much bigger than the last time he saw him. But that was like, what, three months ago? Did he really get all buff and shit in three months? I like DeKeyser as much as any straight man can like another but that seems odd. Having said that...

I love the Wing defense. I really do. I did last year, toward the end. I do now. And I'm not kidding.

If all goes well, Aflrreddsson (x6) and Weiss will fit right in, score often, exchange many hugs and face shield bumps. Their tongues will stay in their mouths but affection will be obvious. That's in a good world, a world baby Jesus promised us when we made the life-long commitment to The Greatest Professional Sports Franchise Ever. I believe it's possible and I also think our Enigmatic Mule has a great chance to be prolific too.

But part of me has a Modano-Whitney fear going on. Part of me has this disgusting concern that Alffrreddsson (x8) is going to find acclimation harder than he thought. I mean, I know it worked for Ray Bourque. Shit it must have because they retired his jersey. But, sometimes I have bad visions and Alf. struggling is one.

I woke up this morning with a horrible feeling. A combination of hangover, cigar, and a day of Ikea ahead of me. MOTHERFUCHER I hate Ikea. But that wasn't it. I'm afraid we're never going to see Darren Helm play consistent hockey again. FYI: If he does, he's the key. If he doesn't, it's not the deal breaker but it hurts. I just want to see that kid play pain free for a while so I can remember how fun it was to watch him.

Is Gustav Nyquist guaranteed a spot? I don't know. I mean, is he one of the guys we can send back without losing him to waivers or whatever? I ask that because if he's healthy and doesn't play 82 then somebody important is getting stupid. 20 goals. You heard it here and that means it absolutely must happen. If he plays...20 goals.

I'm very happy. I'm very happy we're no longer in the West. For all the right reasons, it's a great move for every fan, player and coach. But I'm having a hard time losing my hate for the Blues, Hawks, Dive, etc...and shifting that hate east. I know. Pittsburgh. Got it. I know...we grew up hating Toronto. Noted. I'm sure other rivalries will surface and fester as good rivalries should. But I'm worried that I'm not hating enough. I'll get there.

Brendan Morrow's still out there. In case you were wondering.

If Allffrreddsson (x10) and Weiss work, we have the best two lines in hockey. If Helm comes back we have the best four lines in hockey. If everyone, or mostly everyone, stays healthy...we have the best team in hockey. We already have the best coach, the best (usually) GM, the best everything.

Ten days until the opener and If it's ok with you? I'm going to start counting Tuesdays.

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977. No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y. Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation. There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature. Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that.

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