Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Mom’s Home

And back we go, to the bosoms of our sadistic, bath-salt inhaling/sniffing/licking mothers.  Back we go.  She's deserted us three times, taken to the streets and left us to fend for ourselves.  But each time she limps home promising she'll be better.

Well, she's not

She's back.  But mommy's still a crack whore and we're still the lemmings we were in 1994.  She's pathetic but she's ours.

And so we enjoy her until she leaves again.  We'll forget the shit she's forced us to suffer through and we're going to collectively pretend that the power won't get shut off, or the phones disabled.  

She's back so we're supposed to be thrilled.  She'll be literally surprised if we're anything but that.  Her mind is still fogged by whatever vices she's fallen prey to the last six months.  But it's not the drugs, it's the ignorance.  She's so stupid to think that we'll just smile and hug and dance.  But, of course, it's us who are even dumber because dancing is exactly what we'll do.  She'll tell us the steps and our feet get to shuffling.

I've been thinking about this a long time, whether I could stomach a return to blogging.  Well, I'm going to try but I make no promises.

I'm a Wing fan.  God help me.  But the NHL, the fuching commissioner, the NHLPA...all of it except for my team.  I have nothing for any of them and I'll be less than accomodating for anyone who defends what we've gone through and the garbage suits who orchestrated it.  

We'll see where this goes.  I'll watch the Wings, and it damned well better be for free.  I'll read and I'll write and we'll talk hockey.  But let's not deny what we are and who we're beholden to.  If you're one of the few who will actually stop watching and caring? I promise you that my respect is absolutely epic.  I wish I could join you, but I can't.

So come on in Mommy.  You knew we'd be here and we are.  

But we haven't forgotten what you are, or what you've done. Again, and again, again.

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Comments

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Triple Deke Tyler's avatar

awwwww, yeah

Posted by Triple Deke Tyler from Lansing on 01/06/13 at 11:43 AM ET

edillac's avatar

screw it, I am watching NHL. Better than crappy european leagues

Posted by edillac from isolation on 01/06/13 at 11:56 AM ET

bezukov's avatar

The midget pimp allowed a hockey season after all. He slapped us all like a bunch of you know whats and I’m coming back for more.  Can’t wait to see those beautiful Red and White sweaters on the ice again.  LGRW!

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 01/06/13 at 12:00 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

“Mommy Dearest”. No… wire… hangers. What’s wire hangers doing in this closet when I told you: no wire hangers EVER?

Well come back…..just in time for the February slump….

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, fanning the flames, with rum..... on 01/06/13 at 12:05 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

There was a time, not terribly long ago, when my schedule revolved around Red Wing hockey. Scouting opponents, analyzing line combos, defense pairings,  the IR list, the trade deadline.  I lived and breathed for the Red and White, if it concerned the Wings,  I was very interested.

Today, I am not jumping for joy. Maybe that level of enthusiasm will return sometime.

Ill probably watch with some level of interest - ill always follow the Wings.  But at what level of passion,  I cannot say.

I wish I was excited as some for the return of the game.  I certainly understand others who have been totally turned off by the inanity of the process.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/06/13 at 12:24 PM ET

Hootinani's avatar

I said from day one that if we lost even one game of hockey this season due to Bettman’s bullshit, that I wasn’t coming back this season, no matter when it started.  But then I started hearing about Brunner dominating in the Swiss league.  Then Zetterberg joined him, and the legend grew.  Now I don’t know, if I start hearing tales of greatness from those two in the NHL, that I can stay away.  Throw a Datsyukian Deke or two in there, and I’m going to be powerless.

I thought I had kicked it over the last 5 months, but I can see I’m just as much an addict now as I always was.

Posted by Hootinani from the parade following Babs out of town on 01/06/13 at 12:50 PM ET

cephalopod's avatar

I’ll watch the Wings, and it damned well better be for free.

This cannot be repeated enough.

Posted by cephalopod from Chicago...nope, still not over it. on 01/06/13 at 12:53 PM ET

VooX's avatar

Good luck, bitches, I don’t think I can do it but damn if there aren’t interesting times ahead for the Wings.  It is compelling.

Chief, I hope you still find the fire to blog as while I stayed away from the NHL, I always check in on A2Y. Yours would be a big loss, Raspberry.

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 01/06/13 at 01:33 PM ET

mrfluffy's avatar

And so it begins…the first (shortened) season without TPH. Motherfucher.

Posted by mrfluffy from A wide spot on I-90 in Montana on 01/06/13 at 01:40 PM ET

joedaiceman's avatar

My bet - Wings play strong, you continue blogging. They suck wind, you lose the passion to do it. We need you either way though.

Posted by joedaiceman on 01/06/13 at 02:00 PM ET

Avatar

If the Wings are any good by game 30 at the lastest pretty much anyone that cared before will be pushing their emotional chips in to the center of the table as fast as humanly possible.

The first time you hear ‘Lets go Red Wings’ from the telecast you’ll get goosebumps.

The next time Mickey says ‘When you get the dog down, give it another kick!’ you’ll grin.

If you loved hockey for it being hockey, you’ll be back.  If you loved it for some other reason… who knows.

Posted by HockeyinHD on 01/06/13 at 02:03 PM ET

Hoser's avatar

Is the head dead yet?  NO?!?  You’re kidding, right?  What a waste.

Fuch him, and the soulless skeletons who hired him.

I will not be back.

Posted by Hoser from Downer Peninsula, Michigan on 01/06/13 at 02:07 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

Welcome back, bitches.

Let’s start stankin’ this place up a bit.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 01/06/13 at 02:16 PM ET

WingFanFormerlyInLA's avatar

Well said IwoCPO, and glad I found KK’s recently, good to see some of the old posters from MLive. 

I myself have been torn on this.  A lot of the comments here are true, when you love the Winged Wheel, it’s hard to turn you back on it.  But I think this time I have to.  The NHL just doesn’t get it.  Bettman we know doesn’t get it and simply could care less if he did. 

Some rumors coming out of this lockout include crap like expanding the playoffs, expanding the league, just showing that they simply don’t get it.  The product is too watered down already and the playoffs currently make the regular season a joke.  Seriously, what other league plays for six months to have a finale between the 12th and 16th ranked teams? 

I don’t need to get into a rant, but I’m not going to be a lemming this time, running back and begging for a hit like a down and out druggie.  Mommy can go crawl back under the rock she was hiding under.

Posted by WingFanFormerlyInLA on 01/06/13 at 02:34 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Remember what Bettman said before the lockout - about how the NHL has the “greatest fans” and how we all came back after the last lockout so he knew we’d be back again?

Who wants to prove him right?

Posted by MsRedWinger from the State where Tigers roam in the Spring on 01/06/13 at 03:09 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

There is this to look forward to.

Magically Delicious - and unreal

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=5h55X3uJU84

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/06/13 at 03:17 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

Last I knew, Flip was injured, think it was lower body.  Don’t know if he’s still out or just about to be cleared to come back, but he’s going to need some extra time to get going.

Flip suffered a sprained MCL and the start of the season will roughly coincide with the return timeframe for that injury.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 01/06/13 at 03:25 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

Val was playing almost 30 minutes per night for Jokerit in a role much more varied than the scoring role that Ilari got; from the sources I had.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 01/06/13 at 03:37 PM ET

Hippy Dave's avatar

hoooooraaaaayyyyy…....

I’ll catch a few games, but not nearly as many as before.  Doubt I’ll get Center Ice this year.  This is what will hurt the league.  Diehard fans may come back but will only be watching a fraction of the games they used to.

And if next years’ Winter classic isn’t Wings vs. Leafs in the big house, I’m going to freaking lose it.

For all our sakes, Chief, I hope you stick around.  The place just wouldn’t be the same without you.

Posted by Hippy Dave from Portland by way of Detroit on 01/06/13 at 03:37 PM ET

w2j2's avatar

Jeff: 
Thanks for the video!  THAT is why I watch the Wings. 
I look forward to welcoming Mickey and Ken back into my living room.

Todays’ post is one great metaphor by the Chief.
 
I also will not be spending any money on the Wings going forward. 
Like any other commodity, if I can get it for free, I will. 
After all, if we have learned anything from Bettman, it is that this is just a business, and you make the best deal you can.

Posted by w2j2 on 01/06/13 at 03:38 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

One of the other great signs with the Griffins is that Nyquist and Tatar are probably better than their points output has indicated this year.

I hate to say this about the kid because his hustle is great and his defensive instincts and transition game are very good, but Joakim Andersson has been centering them a lot this season and that guy is almost anti-finish with how he tends to kill of scoring chances. If you think Helm has a frustrating lack of finishing touch, try watching Andersson in front of the net.

Usually increased ice-time means more points, usually.

My source isn’t Finnish, but somebody who watches all of Jokerit’s games online. What I’ve heard is that a lot of those 30 minutes are absolutely designed defensively (especially his PK minutes). Also he did at times look to struggle with exactly how much he was being used. It’s tough for a forward (especially a defensive center like he was being used as) to play that much. Usage like that leads to on-ice rests (i.e. “loafing) at times.

Either way, despite making excuses for him, I agree with you. I hope Filppula rules this season.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 01/06/13 at 04:01 PM ET

BrendonR's avatar

Enough of the BS, time for some hockey!

Posted by BrendonR on 01/06/13 at 04:51 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

Posted by HockeytownOverhaul on 01/06/13 at 03:14 PM ET

Fuch you Jobu.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from where free agents no longer dare. on 01/06/13 at 05:37 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

Fuch you Jobu.

We will be saying that a lot this year, I fear

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie, MI on 01/06/13 at 05:45 PM ET

HockeyFanOhio's avatar

It’s going to piss me off, but I’m afraid I’m going to end up watching the Wings yet again.  I really want to say screw you to the league that has screwed me, but I don’t know if I’m smart enough in the end.  Bastards.

Posted by HockeyFanOhio from Central Ohio on 01/06/13 at 07:01 PM ET

MsRedWingFan's avatar

Welcome back…..just in time for the February slump….

Posted by Rumbear from whatta ya mean there is no hockey… on 01/06/13 at 12:05 PM ET

well now they slump in counting months ..... lets see regular season starts in Oct and they slump in Feb so makes what 5 months? ... 1.Jan - 2. Feb - 3. March - 4. April - 5 ohhhhhhh no I won’t say it

Posted by MsRedWingFan from West Michgian on 01/06/13 at 07:22 PM ET

MsRedWingFan's avatar

I said from day one that if we lost even one game of hockey this season due to Bettman’s bullshit, that I wasn’t coming back this season, no matter when it started.  But then I started hearing about Brunner dominating in the Swiss league.  Then Zetterberg joined him, and the legend grew.  Now I don’t know, if I start hearing tales of greatness from those two in the NHL, that I can stay away.  Throw a Datsyukian Deke or two in there, and I’m going to be powerless.

I thought I had kicked it over the last 5 months, but I can see I’m just as much an addict now as I always was.

Posted by Hootinani on 01/06/13 at 12:50 PM ET

http://youtu.be/5h55X3uJU84

Posted by MsRedWingFan from West Michgian on 01/06/13 at 07:23 PM ET

Kate from AZ-made in Detroit's avatar

I’ll watch the Wings, and it damned well better be for free.


It’s great to have you back, Master Chief. I have missed A2Y more than I can put into words.

I also think that the NHL owes all the Fans a totally FREE Center Ice Game package for what will be called “The Season.” Bitches.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from AZ-made in Detroit on 01/06/13 at 07:45 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

Welcome back all you beautiful bitches!

For those not willing to shell out the cash, there’s always online. VIPbox.tv. thefirstrow.tv. LShunter.tv. usagoals.com. The list is endless to watch the game on your laptop or computer.. It’s what I’ve done for years. smile

For those that want to never watch again.. See ya later. Probably shouldn’t post here either.. Attention seeking bitches.

Anyone see Pasha’s behind the back goal in the shoot out? Oh yes please. smile

Gus is killing in Grand Rapids. Please.. Please don’t bury him on the 4th line. Waste of talent that is.

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 01/06/13 at 09:26 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

I’ll watch the Wings, and it damned well better be for free.

Whoever wants a link…PM me…

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/06/13 at 09:34 PM ET

NIVO's avatar

The withdrawal from dollar hot dog nights has been brutal. Time to sink my teeth into D-Dogs.

Posted by NIVO from underpants gnome village on 01/06/13 at 10:32 PM ET

Kate from AZ-made in Detroit's avatar

I don’t care if the NHL has to pay for it,


You got that right! I have subscribed to Center Ice since day one, not to mention the crap the NHL has just taken on all of us. We deserve an offering of their thanks and appreciation. A small price to pay for my own forty plus years of loyalty. Now multiply that by the millions of other fans that have supported their teams.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from AZ-made in Detroit on 01/06/13 at 10:57 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Fuch em all. I’ll watch when it’s free. I’ll use the free ducats my insurance agent gives me every year. But I won’t let one red cent I’ve earned fall into their greedy little hands.

The perfect human is gone. Our defense is like a collander. JJ and HTOverhaul already noted how bad the injury bug has hit and training camp week hasn’t even started. I give it a month before we’re all wishing the season had been cancelled.

I’m still pissed at the NHL and NHLPA, yet I’m already in full eyeore mode.

Somebody, please hose out the Hasek.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 01/06/13 at 11:41 PM ET

shanetx's avatar

Swedish sites have Homer announcing his retirement and Z being captained.  Huh.

Posted by shanetx from Floydada, Texas on 01/07/13 at 04:55 AM ET

dougie's avatar

I am totally underwhelmed that the lockout is over. It’s like when my alcoholic brother drunk dials me at 3 am to swear he is gonna straighten himself out. Fuch him , and fuch this chickenshit league.

But am I gonna turn in my “11 Cups” vanity plate, and quit cutting off Hurricanes fans on the Raleigh Beltline? Nope. Too much fun.

Am I gonna watch a “Here Comes Honey Boo Boo” marathon with my wife, while the Wings are playing on the other channel? Nope. Not a chance.

Am I gonna take all of my employees to a couple of Hurricane games this season?
Nope. Not even if the Wings come to town. No more $10 parking and $8 beers.

Am I gonna log on to A2Y and say stupid, inappropriate things during Live Blogs?
You can bet your last fuching dollar that I will. That’s the most fun of all.

Bitches.

And again,  uttered with utter sincerity, Gary, I hope you get nut cancer.

Posted by dougie on 01/07/13 at 05:23 AM ET

SnLO's avatar

But the NHL, the fuching commissioner, the NHLPA…all of it except for my team.  I have nothing for any of them and I’ll be less than accomodating for anyone who defends what we’ve gone through and the garbage suits who orchestrated it.

here here that is spot on. i’m right there with you.

If you’re one of the few who will actually stop watching and caring? I promise you that my respect is absolutely epic.  I wish I could join you, but I can’t.

I care about The Team and i’ll watch on tv, but i’m not spending one dollar on this season. I will decide over the summer about the next season spending. i almost reached the point of pure apathy, but i find the prospect of actual Wings hockey is getting me a little excited. There could be good times ahead.

Posted by SnLO from the binary digisphere on 01/07/13 at 09:57 AM ET

hockeychic's avatar

I have always said that I love hockey despite the NHL and the remains true.  I wish I could stay away but I can’t.  I can’t stand the thought of missing any more of Zetterberg, Datsyuk, etc. then I already have.

I’m not proud of it but it is what it is.

Let’s go Red Wings!  Bring it on!

Posted by hockeychic from Denver, CO on 01/07/13 at 10:48 AM ET

jennyquarx's avatar

I’ve missed you guys.  I knew I’d be back.  Here, take my money.  I am that fan.  Can’t wait.  Glad to see most of you are back too.

Posted by jennyquarx on 01/07/13 at 11:11 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

grin

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 01/07/13 at 01:36 PM ET

Colquhoun's avatar

I am coming back because I tried to follow pro football (okay, it was the Lions, so the “pro” part is questionable).  Too slow-moving and predictable.  It was kind of fun when they had the high-school refs - made it a little more WWE.

Plus I would miss the in-between period Pav interviews, the Mickey-isms, Murph when he gets glassy-eyed…..hell, all is forgive.  Let’s go get our Cup back.

And eff Gary Bettman.

Posted by Colquhoun on 01/07/13 at 05:57 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com