Abel to Yzerman
by IwoCPO on 09/06/12 at 07:37 AM ET
I'm pretty sure this is going to work.
I've thought about the occupy the NHL thing a bit, where fans show up to the arenas even if no hockey is being played. I'm not sure if this will work or have the impact that is intended.
That's from one of Dwayne Klessel's "correspondents", a Sabres blogger and it follows on the heels of a stirring video the lounge singer himself made that featured slo-mo montages of crying children and Sally Strothers, everyone sad that Dwayne hasn't stopped this lockout in its tracks a week before we all know it's going to happen.
Dwayne, also known as "Eklund" to his sick dog, his paying customers and multiple team officials is also claiming a "secret deal" might be in the works. All those ditties can be found at Hockey Buzz and that's just how pathetic this summer has become. I went there and stayed for a few minutes.
Mama's gotta eat though. Hockey or not, Mama's gotta eat. Helene St. James, in full-on investigator mode, tweeted 66 times about Hank Zetterberg's snowballs yesterday.
And that's all I'm gonna type about hockey because I seriously do not give a single shit. You want to lock out? Do it. You're a fan and you want to "occupy", well...you're an idiot, but go ahead. You're gonna boycott? Boycott what? No your'e not. You're going to sign a Twitter petition, however the hell you do that? Have at it and absolutely no one will care. You want to wail and defend the players? That's sweet and I'll bet they read every word, taking it in, steeling themselves to "stick together", spurned on by your sympathy.
Seriously, do you think for a single second that Johan Franzen is sitting at home watching Dexter, pausing from time to time to ponder the sad fan? He doesn't give a shit. He wants his money and he probably enjoys playing hockey. He likes the free sweatshirts. I believe they care, vaguely...momentarily, about the people who can't pay bills because they'll be out of jobs at the Joe. Blah, blah, bullshit, blah. I'm not writing anything you don't know. Stress if you want to. I'll be waiting for Helene to tweet her Krispy treat secrets.
Mitch Albom says there's a Tiger game tonite, by the way.
Can they bring it home? How can anybody say? The Tigers begin a 10-game trip tonight against Los Angeles, Chicago and Cleveland.
No they don't. The LA series starts tomorrow. Facts, Mitch. It's just facts.
Again, I'm pathetic. I just finished reading Judy Blume himself, complete with more fake conversations...
"BRING IT HOME, PRINCE!" you yell. "BRING IT HOME, DELMON!"
"Can they bring it home?" your spouse asks.
"Let's just hope they don't come back mathematically eliminated," you whisper. "YOU GOT IT, BOYS! NO SURRENDER!"
It's over. The run is over. Please, I'm asking you, just please stop pretending to be a sports writer. Not even once a week. It's no good for either of us anymore. Hasn't been for more than a decade.
A few weeks ago I picked on Brendan Savage and I don't remember why. I'm also not real excited about going back to look for that post. I just know I jabbed him a bit and then one of you pointed out that he's got a pair. He went up against the Flint Generals and basically one-man-showed their asses. After the comment about that here, I looked up some of his articles when he was covering the Generals a few years ago and it's great stuff. Real reporting. Legitimate investigative journalism without caring who he pissed off. It's good stuff and you can find it all at MLive.
I mention that today because it's got to really stir those journalistic juices every time his bosses tell him to go ahead and write one of these riveting pieces featuring comments from MLive readers.
According to MLive.com readers, it might actually be a good thing if a lockout delays the start of the National Hockey League season. At least for a veteran team like the Red Wings.
Right. Because that robust blue line doesn't need as much time together as possible before Gary's playoffs start.
"Jake in Dayton" wrote this, personally, to Brendan and I'll be pissed on if he didn't run with it.
"It only makes sense that a shortened season would benefit all teams, not just Detroit," jake_in_dayton wrote. "To answer 'yes' to this question you would somehow have to know via crystall ball who the powerhouse teams are going to be, when the shortened season would start and then do a schedule analysis of each team in the NHL. If Detroit avoids the powerhouse teams in the back end of the schedule, then 'yes', they benefit."
I know via crystal ball that the pending lockout has turned everyone and everything into mindless idiots, including me.
Speaking of Savage. Fleet his ass up when Gary lets the season start. Fleet him up and let him go because unless Bruce MacLeod (the anti-digger) comes back? We've got no one willing to do what Lynn Henning did yesterday.
They call it the seven-year itch, that restive time when marriages can crash against the rocks, mostly because one or more parties are simply fatigued.
I wonder if Jim Leyland and the Tigers have reached that point.
A feeling has been building for a few weeks now, spurred by a team's back-and-forth ways, its crushing one-run losses, its inability to revive a half-dozen hitters who somehow have managed to shoot duds for 130 games, that these could be his waning weeks in Detroit.
Man. Sounds like an implosion, eh? Naturally, Henning cites no sources...in true Detroit sports writing style. And he makes a bold claim based on absolute idiot talk show callers (and MLive commenters), but at least he has the nuts to challenge, publicly, the Ilitch regime.
No, I don't think so.
There's some ditties for you. I won't even point you to the literally hundreds of articles out there predicting an end to the Wing playoff streak. To those I say...whatever. I'm not happy with the Summer of Ken '12 and I'm not comfortable that this team--as it stands--appears to be a Cup contender. But I do believe a division title is highly realistic, when you consider each Central team has equal or greater weaknesses.
The Wings will not miss the playoffs, whenever Gary lets them start. Too much talent up front, in goal and--particularly--behind the bench and upstairs.
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Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977. No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y. Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation. There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature. Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: email@example.com