Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

“lkjfdshlhhhdzyez,” said Krupa

Gregg Krupa might be a nice guy and we all know that when it comes to redolence, he’s tops.  But he’s a little too smart for us. We’re hockey fans, Gregg. Wing fans to be precise.  We say “redolent” all the time here and not a damn one of us knows what it means.  You gave us that gift, Gregg. But now you’re pushing it. I’m not real fond of the second “g”, either. Just FYI.

I have no idea if Krupa feels like our tradition of tossing winsome, willowy, dead Octopi onto the JLA ice is good or bad.  No clue. Because I don’t understand a frigging word he writes.  Dammit man.  We read sports pages because we don’t understand Hamlet.

Detroit News

Eliminating the 59-year tradition of good-luck octopus tosses would cost the NHL money, and that is about what commissioner Gary Bettman and a ton of other guys with iPhones obsess in the league offices every day.

“That is about what…”  What? 

So, fear not.

Et tu,  Krup-eh?

Lest we forget, that is why we do it.

“Lest”?  Seriously.  Who the hell says “lest” in conversation.  “I should urinate after this 7th beer without relief; lest I soil myself.”

But my concern here is not that “they” will abjure our tradition.

“Abjure”....isn’t that a mustard?

Remember, this is a game in which delays are both strategized and, often, the product of manifest conspiracy.

Aha, now we’re talking bitch.  Now we’re talking. Finally, a word we understand. Good, good. Go with that.

Delays in play are desired by one side and abhorred by the other.

Shut your abhor mouth, Krupa.

Wait though.  Oh, it gets better. 

The priests of Santeria, the combination of Roman Catholic, African and Native American traditions practiced by millions, say multiple evil spells cast at the same target may needlessly confuse things. Feng Shui, the ancient Chinese application of astronomy and geography to aesthetics with the intent of encouraging peace and well-being, suggests that if something intended to attract good fortune gets confused or causes bad feelings it might result in, well, less peace and well-being.

Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. Charlie Brown teacher talk.  Holy. Hell.  This guy’s writing a hockey story for hockey fans and talking about…Feng Shui?  What. The. Fuch?  You can take that Hong Kong Phooey shit straight to Denver Greg.  Because, brother?  We’re not feeling it.

Thankfully,  there was one line in there that most of us can relate to.

“...it may be a bad idea to toss too often.”

Exactly.  Blindness and all that.  RWBill?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Comments

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stonehands-78's avatar

Adios, Okie.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/22/11 at 11:15 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

“40 below keeps the rif-raf out”  yeah…that crap about the winters is spot on.  Holy BALLS it gets cold here sometimes.  Got snow coming tonight.  Weeeeeeee.
Posted by 42jeff from Minot, North Dakota on 04/22/11 at 05:37 PM ET

I’ve been going to start my early list for eventual “retirement”, or at least potential next state moves.  I was looking for something off the humid and dank east coast, yet not Saginaw.  Orange County, CA is too expensive and taxxy, Albuquerque came to mind, North Dakota might be the best yet (wonder if they tax military retirement pay?).

Posted by RWBill from Imported from Detroit, Land of Todd-Ber-Tuz-zi !! on 04/22/11 at 07:15 PM ET

Here ya go Bill.  Looks like they do tax it, but there’s always exemptions and such.

http://usmilitary.about.com/library/milinfo/statetax/blnd.htm

And for the record…ND folks really love us veterans too.

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 04/22/11 at 11:17 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Flyers starting off the third just like they did when Leighton replaced Boucher.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/11 at 11:31 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Sabres aren’t even challenging for the puck.  WTF…

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/11 at 11:33 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Tied at 3.  16:24 left in the third.

Can’t believe this shit.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/11 at 11:34 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

Not sure what happened.. But Buf sure shit a brick. Least Mule and Z will be ready for next series.. And HOLY HELL. What happened to the Nucks?

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 04/22/11 at 11:39 PM ET

SYF's avatar

What happened to the Nucks?

Posted by RorSchach on 04/22/11 at 09:39 PM ET

After reading Alanah’s summary of the 5-nil drubbing (and on home friggin’ ice), I think I’d blame it on Vigneault’s abject failure to pull Luo when the score was 3-nil and put Schneider in net.  He didn’t and he waited till it was 4-nil and THEN he put in Schneider.

Laviolette pulled the trigger at the right time and it revitalized the Flyers.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/11 at 11:44 PM ET

SYF's avatar

And then Vigneault proclaims Luo is his starter for Game Six!

I giggled like a schoolgirl.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/11 at 11:45 PM ET

SYF's avatar

“Mike Richards rams it ahead.”

Jeebus, Forslund….

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/11 at 11:50 PM ET

Chris in A^2's avatar

In hindsight, the wings look like a defensive juggernaut for actualy holding a 4 goal lead for 30 minutes.

Posted by Chris in A^2 from Nyquist Puck Control on 04/22/11 at 11:52 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Michael Leighton is a defenseman’s goalie.  He’s constantly tapping his defensemen on their shinpads for good plays and good coverage.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/11 at 11:59 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

In hindsight, the wings look like a defensive juggernaut for actualy holding a 4 goal lead for 30 minutes.

Posted by ChrisinA^2 from Michigan, home of the Old Wings on 04/22/11 at 09:52 PM ET

JIMMAH!

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 12:04 AM ET

Chris in A^2's avatar

Flyers fans are taunting Miller, as if their goalies are more effective than a gaping net.

Posted by Chris in A^2 from Nyquist Puck Control on 04/23/11 at 12:05 AM ET

SYF's avatar

And we’re going to OT.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 12:08 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

OT

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 12:08 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Underway in ANA.  Rinne in net for NSH and Emery for the DuhUcks.  Also, Bobby Ryan playing tonight.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 12:11 AM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

so, uh, 4 games last night…causing television schedule problems…and only 2 games tonight.

well done, Gary.  well done.  Ass.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 04/23/11 at 12:12 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Pretty even flow between NSH and ANA.  Really tentative.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 12:15 AM ET

Chris in A^2's avatar

VS finally decided to show the late game instead I’d the OT intermission?

Posted by Chris in A^2 from Nyquist Puck Control on 04/23/11 at 12:19 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Wow.  Preds got away with seven men on ice and no call.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 12:19 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Switching back to the BUF/PHI game going into OT.  Hopefully, it’ll be short.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 12:23 AM ET

HockeyTownTodd's avatar

Just like to say, “Leino sucks this playoff year.”
Posted by SYF

His contract expires this year, and there are rumors that Philly won’t offer him a new one.
His current contract is under a mil a year.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 04/23/11 at 12:24 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Douche Canoe sharing the same box as Brian Engblom. 

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 12:26 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Sabres win it in OT.  BUF leads the series 3-2.

Switching back to NSH/ANA.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 12:33 AM ET

Chris in A^2's avatar

Ennis scores on a rebound to win it for Buffalo, another home team loses

Posted by Chris in A^2 from Nyquist Puck Control on 04/23/11 at 12:33 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Ennis scores on a rebound to win it for Buffalo, another home team loses

Posted by ChrisinA^2 from Michigan, home of the Old Wings on 04/22/11 at 10:33 PM ET

And (ooo Sade in concert in the Panda Center) ANA is losing to the visiting Preds, 1-nil.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 12:35 AM ET

SYF's avatar

His contract expires this year, and there are rumors that Philly won’t offer him a new one.
His current contract is under a mil a year.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 04/22/11 at 10:24 PM ET

They’ll love in DAL.  They dig the Finns there.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 12:46 AM ET

Chris in A^2's avatar

JR teachinG the audience how to count.  He should be on sesame street, not VS half time

Posted by Chris in A^2 from Nyquist Puck Control on 04/23/11 at 12:51 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Hilarious, Chris.  I’m watching NCIS re-runs on USA during the intermission breaks in the NSH/ANA game because I can’t stand Brian Heyward.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 12:52 AM ET

Chris in A^2's avatar

They’ll love in DAL.  They dig the Finns there.

Brunnstrom got waived all the way to Toronto, and then demoted to the Marlies.

Posted by Chris in A^2 from Nyquist Puck Control on 04/23/11 at 12:56 AM ET

HockeyTownTodd's avatar

because I can’t stand Brian Heyward.
Posted by SYF

I lucked into a TSN feed on the paysite.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 04/23/11 at 12:59 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Apparently, one of the DuhUcks players switched to a stiffer shaft - according to Heyward.  I didn’t get the rest because I was laughing too hard.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 01:02 AM ET

HockeyTownTodd's avatar

I’ve been going to start my early list for eventual “retirement”, or at least potential next state moves.  I was looking for something off the humid and dank east coast, yet not Saginaw.  Orange County, CA is too expensive and taxxy, Albuquerque came to mind, North Dakota might be the best yet (wonder if they tax military retirement pay?).
Posted by RWBill

Give some thought to Texas, Bill.  No income taxes there.  If you don’t like the coast, Austin is nice…
a College town…you could stress-test your NVG’s there.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 04/23/11 at 01:09 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

perry is such a richard

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 01:09 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Rinne ROBBED Fairy point-black.  Still 1-nil Preds.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 01:10 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

what a pekka

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 01:10 AM ET

Sullyosis's avatar

Rinne playing well.  NSH to the powerplay after a good steal by Ward in the ANA defensive zone.

Who’s everyone cheering for in this series?

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 04/23/11 at 01:12 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Who’s everyone cheering for in this series?

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 04/22/11 at 11:12 PM ET

‘ucks in 7?

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 01:13 AM ET

SYF's avatar

NSH, actually, Sully because if the Wings meet the Preds, the travel won’t be so bad but I hope it goes seven bloody (literally) games.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/23/11 at 01:14 AM ET

HockeyTownTodd's avatar

“This is the Rinne that is a Vizena finalist, not the imposter that played G#4”

-TSN-

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 04/23/11 at 01:16 AM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com