Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

“lkjfdshlhhhdzyez,” said Krupa

Gregg Krupa might be a nice guy and we all know that when it comes to redolence, he’s tops.  But he’s a little too smart for us. We’re hockey fans, Gregg. Wing fans to be precise.  We say “redolent” all the time here and not a damn one of us knows what it means.  You gave us that gift, Gregg. But now you’re pushing it. I’m not real fond of the second “g”, either. Just FYI.

I have no idea if Krupa feels like our tradition of tossing winsome, willowy, dead Octopi onto the JLA ice is good or bad.  No clue. Because I don’t understand a frigging word he writes.  Dammit man.  We read sports pages because we don’t understand Hamlet.

Detroit News

Eliminating the 59-year tradition of good-luck octopus tosses would cost the NHL money, and that is about what commissioner Gary Bettman and a ton of other guys with iPhones obsess in the league offices every day.

“That is about what…”  What? 

So, fear not.

Et tu,  Krup-eh?

Lest we forget, that is why we do it.

“Lest”?  Seriously.  Who the hell says “lest” in conversation.  “I should urinate after this 7th beer without relief; lest I soil myself.”

But my concern here is not that “they” will abjure our tradition.

“Abjure”....isn’t that a mustard?

Remember, this is a game in which delays are both strategized and, often, the product of manifest conspiracy.

Aha, now we’re talking bitch.  Now we’re talking. Finally, a word we understand. Good, good. Go with that.

Delays in play are desired by one side and abhorred by the other.

Shut your abhor mouth, Krupa.

Wait though.  Oh, it gets better. 

The priests of Santeria, the combination of Roman Catholic, African and Native American traditions practiced by millions, say multiple evil spells cast at the same target may needlessly confuse things. Feng Shui, the ancient Chinese application of astronomy and geography to aesthetics with the intent of encouraging peace and well-being, suggests that if something intended to attract good fortune gets confused or causes bad feelings it might result in, well, less peace and well-being.

Wah, wah, wah, wah, wah. Charlie Brown teacher talk.  Holy. Hell.  This guy’s writing a hockey story for hockey fans and talking about…Feng Shui?  What. The. Fuch?  You can take that Hong Kong Phooey shit straight to Denver Greg.  Because, brother?  We’re not feeling it.

Thankfully,  there was one line in there that most of us can relate to.

“...it may be a bad idea to toss too often.”

Exactly.  Blindness and all that.  RWBill?

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Sullyosis's avatar

ucks in 7?
Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/22/11 at 11:13 PM ET

My thoughts as well.  Hate to face the Preds later on, Anaheim doesn’t scare me as much.  But what about the idea that we get SJ in the next round, so either way this winner gets Vancouver.  In that case it’s Vancouver in the Final (sweet) or Ana/Nsh.  In that case I’d like NSH just because it’s such a different game than anything they’ve ever played before.  And if Anaheim makes it that far it may be more difficult to stop whoever it is that’s hot for them (Emery, Getzlaf/Perry/Ryan/Selanne etc).

Just my thoughts so far.

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 04/23/11 at 12:17 AM ET

Sullyosis's avatar

Posted by SYF from I-75 and Dix Hwy on 04/22/11 at 11:02 PM ET

Ducks’ tators just said of Selanne:  “He’s a player who likes to dive into the holes.”

Thought you’d appreciate it.

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 04/23/11 at 12:20 AM ET

HockeyTownTodd's avatar

Who’s everyone cheering for in this series?
Posted by stonehands-78

7 games with lotsa black’n blue, knee braces, shoulder harnesses and duct tape.
and
reasonable offficiating for round 2.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 04/23/11 at 12:22 AM ET

Sullyosis's avatar

Haha HTT, I thought you were serious until I read the last preference.

“You funny guy.”

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 04/23/11 at 12:23 AM ET

SYF's avatar

For some reason, Sully, I’m channeling RWBill tonight.  Certain things…

Oh shit.  No.Fuching.Kidding.  The DuhUcks have their version of Vancouver’s Green men called the Orange Men right beside the visitors’ sin bin.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 12:24 AM ET

Chris in A^2's avatar

Unless San Jose or Vancouver go down we don’t get to see either until the western conference, and I don’t think either team will make it that far.  I’m rooting for Nashville to get their first franchise playoff series win against the Ducks.

Posted by Chris in A^2 from Nyquist Puck Control on 04/23/11 at 12:26 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Tied at 1.  Just 6:20 left in the second.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 12:28 AM ET

HockeyTownTodd's avatar

playin’ with fire giving the Ducks PP’s

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 04/23/11 at 12:29 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Yep.  DuhUcks have the #1 PP in the playoffs.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 12:33 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Tied at 1 after two periods of play.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 12:42 AM ET

HockeyTownTodd's avatar

All the kickass hockey seems to settle down in G#5 in the playoffs.
If the score goes awry in the third, I doubt you will see any messages in the final minutes.
This isn’t Pittsburgh.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 04/23/11 at 12:47 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

All the kickass hockey seems to settle down in G#5 in the playoffs.
If the score goes awry in the third, I doubt you will see any messages in the final minutes.
This isn’t Pittsburgh.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 04/22/11 at 11:47 PM ET


but it is the ‘ucks.

and prednecks.

grin

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 12:56 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Third period starting up.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 01:00 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

wow

what an effort by ryan

wow

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 01:01 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Bobby Ryan with probably the most spectacular singular effort of the past week.

2-1 DuhUcks.

You gotta see the replay.  It was sensational.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 01:01 AM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

holy shit what a goal by Ryan!

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 04/23/11 at 01:02 AM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

ucks scored…....

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 04/23/11 at 01:04 AM ET

SYF's avatar

DuhUcks chanting, “Preds, You suck!”

Creative…

I mean, really.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 01:05 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Emery tall in the net for the DuhUcks.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 01:17 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Big rebound off the backboards and the Preds tie it up at 2 with about 8:30 left in the third.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 01:23 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

two-to-two

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 01:23 AM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

Tied up

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 04/23/11 at 01:25 AM ET

HockeyTownTodd's avatar

ANA playing way to careful now.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 04/23/11 at 01:26 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

3-2, ‘ucks

but i don’t think they’re done yet

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 01:27 AM ET

SYF's avatar

And the DuhUcks’ Blake puts them right back up by one, 3-2.

Gutsy play by Salami.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 01:27 AM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

well not anymore….... ANA-3 - 2 Ducks

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 04/23/11 at 01:27 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

salami having a big series

old man still can score

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 01:28 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Watching the replay of Salami’s unbelievable pass, how apropos that it was SOB’bing who cost himself position to finish his check.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 01:31 AM ET

SYF's avatar

CLANG!

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 01:31 AM ET

SYF's avatar

If this game goes to OT, the DuhUcks own it.  Shea Weber’s laboriously breathing.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 01:32 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Uh oh…

Clocking out, 19.  Catch y’all on the flipside.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/11 at 01:33 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

3-2, ‘ucks

but i don’t think they’re done yet

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 12:27 AM ET


see,

tied at 3

looking at OT

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 01:40 AM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

prednecks win

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/23/11 at 02:00 AM ET

Chris in A^2's avatar

first franchise game 5 win for Nashville.  Home ice and 3rd period leads continue to mean nothing in the 2011 postseason.

Posted by Chris in A^2 from Nyquist Puck Control on 04/23/11 at 02:02 AM ET

HockeyTownTodd's avatar

4 games tomorrow
Noon
3:00 PM
7:00 PM
10:30 PM

3 of the games could be series enders.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 04/23/11 at 02:08 AM ET

Sullyosis's avatar

If this game goes to OT, the DuhUcks own it.  Shea Weber’s laboriously breathing.
Posted by SYF from I-75 and Dix Hwy on 04/23/11 at 12:32 AM ET

I’m only quoting this in case you say something “foreshadowy” I disagree with when the Wings play…

Posted by Sullyosis from A hateful lair in Post Apocalyptic US (or Arizona) on 04/23/11 at 02:14 AM ET

monkey's avatar

Holy Hell this blog is the gift that just keeps on giving.

Finally, after all these years, we finally get to see Mel Brooks’ History of the World, Part II segment “Hitler on Ice”. Still waiting on “Jews in Space”.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 04/23/11 at 09:11 AM ET

monkey's avatar

I’m usually late to the party, but has anyone seen this one:

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 04/23/11 at 09:28 AM ET

Baroque's avatar

By the time I got to the end of that paragraph, I was laughing so hard tears were streaming down my face. Only Ms. B. could post something like that here at A2Y. Great stuff.

Posted by OlderThanChelios on 04/22/11 at 10:32 AM ET

Heh heh, it just pushed one of my buttons. The entire article sounded like he’d swallowed a “Big Word of the Day” calendar and was barfing the pages back up in random order. It was DREADFUL.

(BTW, I may not have been commenting because it wouldn’t be timely, but I have been reading all the posts. Nice to see all you reprobates doing well and with pets safely stowed for round two if you have need of the sacrifice.) LOL

Posted by Baroque from Michigan on 04/23/11 at 09:32 AM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Posted by monkey from bat country on 04/23/11 at 08:28 AM ET

My favorite cartoon made even better.  That is freaking fantastic.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/23/11 at 10:57 AM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com