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Abel to Yzerman

Lidstrom Screwed By Stats And Stupidity

I officially discovered that the Professional Hockey Writers Association are a bunch of clowns today, via the Emperor and Khan(!)

Luminary minds at the PHWA, like Greg Wyshynski and Adrian Dater, announced this season’s Norris trophy finalists:

Chicago’s Duncan Keith, Washington’s Mike Green and Los Angeles’ Drew Doughty were named Friday as the finalists for the awarded presented to the NHL’s top defenseman.

Wait.  What?

You’re telling me that the “great”, “professional” hockey journalists at the PHWA decided Nick Lidstrom, The Perfect Human, wasn’t a Norris finalist?  Utter nonsense.  A room full of monkey at desks masturbating on typewriters would have done a better job at awarding this year’s Norris Trophy.

It is just the second time in 12 seasons that Lidstrom, a six-time Norris winner, hasn’t been a finalist. He finished ninth in scoring among defensemen with 49 points (nine goals, 40 assists).

Those bitches can suck it.  While Lidstrom may not deserve to win the Norris this season, he deserves to be a finalist.  No fauxing doubt about it.

By not voting for Lidstrom in a higher position, the pro hockey writers prove that they don’t watch hockey at all.  They put their blind faith in something far less useful.

 

 

The finalists were the three-highest scoring defensemen in the league. Green led the way with 76 points (19 goals, 57 assists), followed by Keith (14-55—69) and Doughty (16-43—59).

Stats.  The pro hockey writers use stats as a crutch to replace actually watching lots of hockey.  It is now official.  The Norris Trophy will be the equivalent of the Art Ross Trophy for defenceman.

It doesn’t matter that today we can DVR any game to watch the next day.  It doesn’t matter that most games are broadcast widescreen so you can actually watch defenceman away from the puck thwart the offense.  None of that matters to pro hockey writers.  They have made it perfectly clear that they will let stats fuel their hockey ignorance from now on.  They can all kiss my ass.

I asked Puck Daddy to send me his autograph on a large piece of aluminum foil as I wanted to make another tin-foil hat.  He obliged.  It was cute he used hearts to dot all his i’s.  On the same piece of aluminum foil he listed his Norris Trophy picks:

1. Drew Doughty, Los Angeles Kings
2. Mike Green, Washington Capitals
3. Duncan Keith, Chicago Blackhawks
4. Nicklas Lidstrom, Detroit Red Wings
5. Chris Pronger, Philadelphia Flyers

Great job, Greg, you’ve made 3 terrible decisions in only 5 choices.  You fail.

There is no way Lidstrom is only the fourth best defenceman this season.  Stats have blinded you like chronic masturbation did in your teenage years. 

This year’s Olympic hockey tournament proved a couple of things.  The greatest hockey minds in Canada, including Steve Yzerman, all agreed that Mike Green was a defensive liability not worth the risk of having on an Olympic roster despite his huge offensive numbers.  Also, Chris Pronger is completely out of place in today’s game.  The best decision Babcock made during the Olympics was to bench Pronger. 

The Sasquatch does not think or skate well, he is a throwback to the clutch-and-grab years of hockey.  Pronger only commits stupid and violent penalties when on the ice today.  That he is Puck Daddy’s fifth-best choice for the Norris Trophy shows what a joke Greg really is.  Which is why he fits in so nicely among the other drooling idiots of the PHWA.

I’m so glad I’m only a faux journalist.  I’d hate to be forced to stop watching hockey to do my job.

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Comments

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Avatar

i know i am about to basically piss on a bee hive here, but i have watched the wings play in the first round, and Lidstrom looks like his age has finally caught up with him.  At some point, as wing fans, you had to know that would be the case.

lighten up.

Posted by gretzky_to_lemieux on 04/23/10 at 03:22 PM ET

Osrt's avatar

Stats have blinded you like chronic masturbation did in your teenage years.

Bravo Sir. Doughty has been a beast and looks like a guy you could build a team around. The Wings are built around King Lidas.

Build a team around Green? Have fun with that.

Posted by Osrt on 04/23/10 at 03:22 PM ET

MarkK's avatar

i have watched the wings play in the first round

The award is based on regular season, friend.

Posted by MarkK from Maryland on 04/23/10 at 03:27 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

i know i am about to basically piss on a bee hive here, but i have watched the wings play in the first round, and Lidstrom looks like his age has finally caught up with him.  At some point, as wing fans, you had to know that would be the case.

lighten up.

Lidstrom has look uncharacteristically slow in the first round matchup, I can’t argue that.  The point is that not a single minute of playoff hockey is considered for Norris voting and Lidstrom has not looked like that the whole season.  He’s had a couple of times this season that made Wings fans lock themselves in dark rooms to keep the bad thoughts away, but throughout most (and I mean like 98%) of the season, he’s been better than just about every other defenseman out there.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 04/23/10 at 03:27 PM ET

Avatar

Wow, how to overreact 101. What about the great majority of hockey fans who agree that Lidstrom did not deserve the nod this year. What a big waste of time reading this “text” was. Amateur.

Posted by hockeydude from canada on 04/23/10 at 03:27 PM ET

VooX's avatar

Wow, how to overreact 101. What about the great majority of hockey fans who agree that Lidstrom did not deserve the nod this year. What a big waste of time reading this “text” was. Amateur.

Learn how to read 101.

While Lidstrom may not deserve to win the Norris this season, he deserves to be a finalist.  No fauxing doubt about it.

What a big waste of time reading this “comment” was.  Amateur.

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/23/10 at 03:33 PM ET

Andy from FightNight's avatar

Posted by gretzky_to_lemieux on 04/23/10 at 02:22 PM ET
His first round has been weak, but believe us, he had a great season.


Anywho.. The NHL needs to add an award for best offensive forward (without defensive skills) so that real defensemen can win the Norris

Posted by Andy from FightNight on 04/23/10 at 03:34 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

i know i am about to basically piss on a bee hive here

Cool.  Didn’t you win the coveted Darwin Award once?

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 04/23/10 at 03:36 PM ET

Avatar

oh, you wings fans…..maybe lebda should have been nominated too..

Posted by jmiller on 04/23/10 at 03:37 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

A reading from the Troll Bible, book of N00b Chapter 1, verses 15-20:

“And lo, when thoust trollest something thou doth want to make let known is beneath thine own intellect, tis always best to start thine comment with “wow”, as it is one of the sacred words to our kind and also the most hurtful and painful words to those who oppose us.”

Praise be to pwned.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 04/23/10 at 03:42 PM ET

Bent's avatar

oh, you wings fans…..maybe lebda should have been nominated too..
Posted by jmiller on 04/23/10 at 02:37 PM ET

Nah.  Your team want him?

Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 04/23/10 at 03:44 PM ET

Avatar

And then there’s the fact The Perfect Human played ALL 82 games this year… facing the best lines the opposition could put on the ice… night in, night out.  That Lidstrom isn’t a finalist just shows there ain’t no justice in this world.

Minds will change when he lifts The Cup this year.  Take that to the bank.

Posted by Buck from The High Plains of New Mexico on 04/23/10 at 03:44 PM ET

Tony's avatar

I have a compromise proposal….

Anybody but Green.

ANYBODY

Can we get all agree to at least that ??  wink

Posted by Tony from Virginia Beach, VA on 04/23/10 at 03:46 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

I have a compromise proposal….

Anybody but Green.

ANYBODY

Can we get all agree to at least that ??

If you can find me a non-Caps fan that thinks Green should win the Norris, I’ll buy you an imaginary beer in we’ll-probably-never-meet-in-person land.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 04/23/10 at 03:50 PM ET

DetCapC19's avatar

Wow, how to overreact 101. What about the great majority of hockey fans who agree that Lidstrom did not deserve the nod this year. What a big waste of time reading this “text” was. Amateur.

Learn how to read 101.

While Lidstrom may not deserve to win the Norris this season, he deserves to be a finalist.  No fauxing doubt about it.

What a big waste of time reading this “comment” was.  Amateur.


HAHAHAH!!!
Greatest comeback ever.

Absolute Gold.

Posted by DetCapC19 from Vancouver, BC on 04/23/10 at 03:52 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

What about the great majority of hockey fans who agree that Lidstrom did not deserve the nod this year.

how many of them did you ask?

oh, wait, you mean you just assumed the “great majority of hockey fans” agree with your analysis?  imagine that.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 04/23/10 at 03:55 PM ET

Osrt's avatar

A reading from the Troll Bible, book of N00b Chapter 1, verses 15-20:

“And lo, when thoust trollest something thou doth want to make let known is beneath thine own intellect, tis always best to start thine comment with “wow”, as it is one of the sacred words to our kind and also the most hurtful and painful words to those who oppose us.”

Praise be to pwned.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas

Ah-choo. Bless You.

I’m going to frame this and masturbate to it before I go to sleep every night.

Create an All-World roster and have someone else besides King Lidas as your number 1 d-man. Tell me who that would be. Fuchtards.

Posted by Osrt on 04/23/10 at 03:56 PM ET

Osrt's avatar

Btw, and this may be stretching things, but Lidas is the only Euro on that list. If he was a good ol’ boy––in hockey terms––I don’t think he would have been ignored for as long as he was and given the benefit of the doubt this year, i.e. Pronger.

I hope that’s not the case because that would be a triumph to Cherry and his kind.

Posted by Osrt on 04/23/10 at 04:01 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

I said it on the main page not too long ago & I’ll say it again….
There is not another D-man in the league I’d rather have on my team this season.
The MSM has proven time and time again to be full of fools and this award has evolved into something other than for the best defensive defenseman in the NHL.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 04/23/10 at 04:03 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

from behindthenet.ca, Lidstrom’s quality of competition is .068

Green’s is .031

Oh, sorry. that’s ANDY Greene.

Mike Green is .005

Doughty is .027

Keith is .081

so only Keith has a higher quality of competition than Lidstrom.  Green barely registers.

Green’s +/- clearly comes from being on a high scoring team.  considering his quality of competition is basically 0, no wonder he scores at will. 

Lidstrom averages 2:51 per game of PK.  Keith is at 2:58.  Green 2:09.  Doughty 2:01.

one stat that stands out to me…Lidstrom took only 22 penalty minutes this season.  Green and Doughty took 54, Keith took 51.  you can’t be very effective defensively when you’re sitting in the box putting your team a man down, can you?

the bottom line here is that Keith is a good choice, IMO.  Doughty not so much.  Green, not at all.  there’s no way those last two should be nominated over Lidstrom.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 04/23/10 at 04:11 PM ET

SYF's avatar

The only reason Mike Green’s on this list is because his defense partner Tom Poti bails out his ass everytime he goes on a boneheaded, ill-timed rush that costs his team position.  Maybe they should’ve put Poti as a Finalist.  I guarantee you I wouldn’t build a team around Green.  Lidstrom, oh hell yeah.  Doughty, definitely.  Green, fuch no.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/23/10 at 04:12 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

This voting for this award needs to be taken away from the “Professional” Hockey “Writer’s” Assholiation.

Give that responsibility to a group of people who know the game of hockey, watch way too much hockey, and whose professional lives depend on their ability to evaluate hockey talent: the Directors of Scouting or Head Scouts of each NHL team. That is who should be voting to determine the best defenseman. Perhaps then, the best defenseman might actually win the award more often than not.

Wysdoucheski gets to vote for the Norris? The Norris is dead to me. The Teen Choice Awards have more credibility than a professional sports award that allows “writers” like Wyshdoucheski and Douchehatcheckgirl to select the award winner.

But do I know, I’m not even a blogger. I’m just a blogger bunny.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/23/10 at 04:13 PM ET

Avatar

This is the way I see it.  Your team is at game 82 and you need to win to get in and you have the choice of one D man in the whole league to play 25 - 30 minutes.  Based on their performance this year you’re telling me you would take Green over Lidstrom? 

Stop sucking the glass c*ck PHWA

Posted by Phil from Montreal on 04/23/10 at 04:14 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

But do I know

=But what do I know.

And the first word of the post should be “The” not this.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/23/10 at 04:15 PM ET

AndrewFromAnnArbor's avatar

The Norris Trophy will be the equivalent of the Art Ross Trophy for defenceman.

Some years, it is.  This is just one of those years.

That being said, it’s not for the best defensive defenseman either.  It’s for the best all-around.  This year, Lidstrom was not so far ahead of the competition as to make it no contest, as he has been in previous years, so he loses out.  There’s also an element of him having to compete against his Norris years, which is also unfair.  Now that he’s simply outstanding instead of supernaturally good, he falls to earth with all the other competitors and gets ignored.

But don’t forget that The Emperor, a paid-up member of the PHWA, is one of the people who gets a vote.  Never forget the diamonds in a mountain of coal.

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 04/23/10 at 04:16 PM ET

Avatar

Keith took 51.  you can’t be very effective defensively when you’re sitting in the box putting your team a man down, can you?

15 of those were on one play in a game Chicago was already going to lose, iirc, so its more like L 22, K 36.

Posted by steve on 04/23/10 at 04:19 PM ET

Believe's avatar

Regardless of whether or not you think Lidstrom is still a top-three defenseman, Mike Green is definitely NOT. Having him as a finalist (again, good lord) totally invalidates the award as far as I’m concerned… which I guess makes me less upset that Lidstrom didn’t get a nod, so that something.

Posted by Believe from Saginaw on 04/23/10 at 04:19 PM ET

AndrewFromAnnArbor's avatar

Second time Okie’s had his GDT zinged.

Poor Okie.

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 04/23/10 at 04:19 PM ET

Avatar

Ah, the ultimate irony - accusing people of not watching hockey in making their Norris selections, but at the same time obviously not watching a single minute of Capitals hockey to see the drastic improvement Green made this season on defense.

What a bush league article this is.

Posted by JRock on 04/23/10 at 04:24 PM ET

Avatar

Lol, maybe you should stop watching hockey as you clearly don’t now.  Lidstrom has shown his age this year and is definitely not norris worthy anymore. Cry some more wings fans!

Posted by TIn Foil Hat on 04/23/10 at 04:25 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

one stat that stands out to me…Lidstrom took only 22 penalty minutes this season.  Green and Doughty took 54, Keith took 51.  you can’t be very effective defensively when you’re sitting in the box putting your team a man down, can you?

Here’s the other thing.  I think penalty minutes really stands out as a stat for defensemen in a way it doesn’t for forwards.  In general, unless they’re fighting majors, penalties taken by defensemen indicate that, at some point, they were caught out of position or made another big mistake in a way that’s way more telling than a forward’s minutes in the box will tell you (defenders hook when they’re beaten, forecheckers hook when they’re lazy).  It’s just like how takeaways as a stat mean more to forwards than to defenseman, I think penalty minutes for defensemen tells you more about the way the guy plays the game than it does for centers and wingers.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 04/23/10 at 04:25 PM ET

Avatar

Keith and Doughty, no argument there.  Green may be a finalist solely by virtue of his appearance in GEICO commercials. Oh, and it could also be the case that several professional hockey writers out there forgot how to spell LIDSTROM.

Posted by cephalopod from work on 04/23/10 at 04:27 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

Ah, the ultimate irony - accusing people of not watching hockey in making their Norris selections, but at the same time obviously not watching a single minute of Capitals hockey to see the drastic improvement Green made this season on defense.

I’ve seen probably 20 Capitals games this season.  Improving marginally over completely sucking still means you marginally suck.  Seriously, find me a non-Caps fan who thinks Green deserves this award…

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 04/23/10 at 04:28 PM ET

Avatar

I’ve seen probably 20 Capitals games this season.  Improving marginally over completely sucking still means you marginally suck.  Seriously, find me a non-Caps fan who thinks Green deserves this award…

You already did, Greg Wyhsynski over at Puck Daddy. He’s a Devils fan.

Posted by JRock on 04/23/10 at 04:29 PM ET

Avatar

The only reason Mike Green’s on this list is because his defense partner Tom Poti bails out his ass everytime he goes on a boneheaded, ill-timed rush that costs his team position.  Maybe they should’ve put Poti as a Finalist.  I guarantee you I wouldn’t build a team around Green.  Lidstrom, oh hell yeah.  Doughty, definitely.  Green, fuch no.

Build a team around a 40 year-old defenseman? And I didn’t think the comments could get any stupider.

Also, Green was paired with Schultz since mid-season, but nice try.

Posted by JRock on 04/23/10 at 04:35 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

I’m so glad I’m only a faux journalist.  I’d hate to be forced to stop watching hockey to do my job.

Posted by pgoody on 04/23/10 at 04:35 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

I’ve seen probably 20 Capitals games this season.  Improving marginally over completely sucking still means you marginally suck.  Seriously, find me a non-Caps fan who thinks Green deserves this award…

You already did, Greg Wyhsynski over at Puck Daddy. He’s a Devils fan.

um, read it again.  he didn’t put Green at #1.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 04/23/10 at 04:38 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

Do we have a Caps troll here…

if we do then heres my message, you better beat the shit out of those fuchin Pens

Posted by pgoody on 04/23/10 at 04:38 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

You already did, Greg Wyhsynski over at Puck Daddy. He’s a Devils fan.


Try again, pal.  I didn’t ask for you to find me a non-Caps fan who thinks Green is more deserving than Lidstrom, I asked for one who thinks he should win.  Wysh picked Doughty as the winner and, while he’s my 2nd pick behind Duncan Keith, his name certainly isn’t Mike Green.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 04/23/10 at 04:39 PM ET

AndrewFromAnnArbor's avatar

You already did, Greg Wyhsynski over at Puck Daddy. He’s a Devils fan.

Really?  Sure looks to me like Wyshynski chose Doughty for the Norris.

Posted by AndrewFromAnnArbor from Fortress Europe on 04/23/10 at 04:40 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com