Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

I NOW Consider Gustav Nyquist A Hall of Famer

You all know what I didn't shut this morning. And I know better.  I do.  Clearly, I've jinxed us.  The possibility of the Wings not falling prey to this Trap Game are so slim, so very slim.  Just start considering the scenarios now...the Wings-lose, BJs-win scenarios.  And it's my fault. I know.  Too much swagger. Too soon.

They played so well last night, so much deja vu (not the club) and remembering.

Two straight games of happiness. Two straight games to remind us of what could be, but that's all over.  Three (games, not goals) is too much to ask and I know that.  

It's imperative that we open the club car now.  Don't clean it.  Just open it and waddle up.  Voox is there.  He's been there all day and is incoherent.  Kate will be there and she'll be optimistic but quick to remind you, me, all of us that mouths are not to be opened whore-style so early.  Bill will have his graphs and he'll be hitting on my wife. Again.  Rummy will be soaking in a tub, but it's not really a tub because we can't afford it. It's just a trough, and it's filled with warm PBR but he doesn't care.  The old stand bys will show up: Gabe and AndrewfromAnnArbor.  Baroque. Sully, JJ, Tyler and all the other 19 who've started their own blogs.  Everyone will be there and it will be raucus and glorious.  

And my dirty whore mouth will remain shut.  Pets are in play tonite.  Their survival is not required.  Neighbors, remember them?  They must understand that a medium-sized fire is not the end of the world.  

It's a Live Blog, bitches. Early start, just like a playoff game.  Because that's exactly what this is.  God save us all. RSV.

But wait...it can't end there, can it?  I just remembered. It's our last game against the Central, Gary's special creation.  Our last game against our fake rivals, our last game as divisional partners with Shea Weber, who slammed Henrik Zetterberg's head into the glass last playoffs but was not penalized because Gary Bettman directed leniency because it was a Wing he hit and not Rosby or a Hawk.  

So, I'm taking it all back and I'm opening my Whore Mouth wide, like on Cinemax.  

Wings wrap this fucher up tonite convincingly. BJs lose, if that matters.  And we start thinking about what matters most.  LGRW.

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Comments

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Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Two hooks on Z . No call.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

SYF's avatar

And what are you bitches drinking?

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/25/13 at 07:46 PM ET

Guinness, you handsome bastard.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

call your timeout Babbles.  let their brains reset.  they’re behind the curve.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

What’s with the sticks tonight?  Geez.

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

WALLY

FUCH YES

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

hey people watching on Xbox, turn the frigging difficulty down.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

Mandingo's avatar

F*ck yes!

Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Fils!

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

0-0!

Posted by pgoody on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

FAPULATOR BEATS MASON

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

VooX's avatar

Flip with his 100th and second in as many games.  We have entered the Twilight Zone.

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

Yzersyuk's avatar

Franzen to Flip FUCHIN yess!!

Posted by Yzersyuk on 04/25/13 at 06:49 PM ET

Primis's avatar

Well then, Fil.

Posted by Primis on 04/25/13 at 06:50 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

YESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 04/25/13 at 06:50 PM ET

Puck's avatar

And what are you bitches drinking?

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/25/13 at 07:46 PM ET

Sierra Nevada Torpedo Extra from the can out of a paper bag on the train ride home.

Posted by Puck from San Francisco, CA on 04/25/13 at 06:50 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

FILL-A-POOL-A!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 04/25/13 at 06:50 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

I screamed outloud! Hope ya all did too!

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 04/25/13 at 06:50 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Flips it in! Mule working like a Mule!


Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/25/13 at 06:50 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

This will end 7-5, right?

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/25/13 at 06:50 PM ET

dougie's avatar

Good, I can stick with iced tea for a bit longer. I was eyeing the Mason jar after that early goal.

Posted by dougie on 04/25/13 at 06:50 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

hey people watching on Xbox, turn the frigging difficulty down.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/25/13 at 07:49 PM ET

Nice…

Posted by pgoody on 04/25/13 at 06:50 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

JIMMAH

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 04/25/13 at 06:50 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

The five million dollar man….

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 04/25/13 at 06:51 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Jimmah slapping his Dong saying, “The fuch you are, bitch.”

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 04/25/13 at 06:51 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Fuch, Jimmah is bailing the boys out. Way too many quality scoring chances for bubba

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/25/13 at 06:51 PM ET

VooX's avatar

Franzen forces turnover near the corner, Cleary picks up puck and dishes back to Mule, and he makes a quick pass from behind the net to Flip.

Apparently all of our most hated have had there pets, children, and women held hostage.  I highly suspect one of the 19 but I won’t be the one to point fingers.

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/25/13 at 06:51 PM ET

edillac's avatar

Mule is alive again

Posted by edillac from isolation on 04/25/13 at 06:51 PM ET

Yzersyuk's avatar

When Franzen starts slow dekeing through the slot, blood rushes to my groin.

Posted by Yzersyuk on 04/25/13 at 06:51 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Jimmah Dong.

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 04/25/13 at 06:51 PM ET

Mandingo's avatar

Wings are flyin’ tonight. Just gotta watch the bad bounces.

Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 04/25/13 at 06:51 PM ET

Primis's avatar

Fil is a Hall of Famer now.

Posted by Primis on 04/25/13 at 06:52 PM ET

SYF's avatar

When Franzen starts slow dekeing through the slot, blood rushes to my groin.

Posted by Yzersyuk on 04/25/13 at 07:51 PM ET

Sounds like an affliction.  If it leads to goals scored for the Wings, well, then don’t stop.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 04/25/13 at 06:53 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

When Franzen starts slow dekeing through the slot, blood rushes to my groin.

I hope you swell to death, baby.

Wait…

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/25/13 at 06:53 PM ET

Primis's avatar

Franzen has Beast Mode engaged.

Posted by Primis on 04/25/13 at 06:53 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Sounds like an affliction.  If it leads to goals scored for the Wings, well, then don’t stop.

For at least 4 hours.

Posted by calquake on 04/25/13 at 06:54 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

I don’t know what the next two minutes that I’m delayed hods, but it looks like we are all over these Bitches if we settle down and eliminate the mistakes.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/25/13 at 06:54 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

did Cleary just RACE to the puck?!

what universe did I wake up in?  this must be the one where…

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 04/25/13 at 06:54 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

No way I stay until the end of this class.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/25/13 at 06:54 PM ET

VooX's avatar

When Franzen starts slow dekeing through the slot, blood rushes to my groin.
Posted by Yzersyuk on 04/25/13 at 07:51 PM ET

This.  I got kitten-sized wood.

Fil is a Hall of Famer now.
Posted by Primis on 04/25/13 at 07:52 PM ET

Trying to correlate that statement with Corsi, Fenwick, and Fuchstick stats just caused TheLinkGoesHere to have a stroke.  Well done.

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/25/13 at 06:54 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Oh Nike, you are fuching awesome.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 04/25/13 at 06:55 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com