Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Have You Heard The News About Uncle Joe And His Obscene Live Blogs?

There are no trends. Some would say, during the playoffs, that nothing real exists. We boiled the Easter Bunny on Sunday, a nifty addition to a growing list of domestic pets sacrificed in the name of our cause.

We've turned an innocent train, just a small, clean little choo choo, into a den of sin and drunken excess. We've done everything possible to assure an easy entrance into Hell just based purely on our conduct during the last ten playoffs, or so.

We've been juvenile, disgusting, despicable, redolent.

But that's because we're loyal and because our expectations are high, and because we are an immensely intelligent, handsome group of people with great scorn for pretty much everyone else.

Some of you consider tonite to be worthy of Lightfoot.  No. I say no.  Gordon Lightfoot is used in times of desperation.  This is not that time.  1-1 with three games left at Joe Louis is not that time.

Now...should the Wings lose in the same skinny-guy-in-prison fashion? If the power play continues to suck ass? If Datsyuk, Nyquist, FRANZEN, and pretty much everyone else remain ice cold? If Howard plays poorly? If, if, if....yes, then we may call on Lightfoot.

But not yet. Not...tonite ("Miracle" reference...just FYI).

No Alfredsson tonite and that's ok. He's been invisible. Andersson in because law states you can only substitute a Swede for a Swede not named Sameulsson.  You cannot replace a Swede with a Canadian(en) serial killer. Sorry Bert.

No Lightfoot tonite because I'm not nervous. Something tells me Game 2 may have triggered a realization in the Wings that only they can understand.

I am optimistic.

I'm not kidding.

This is a live blog, bitches.

15 to 12.

LGRW.

Filed in: | Abel to Yzerman | Permalink
 

Comments

« Previous        < 1 2 3 4 >  Last ›      Next »

BrendonR's avatar

Time to get some good speed going off the hop.

Posted by BrendonR on 04/22/14 at 07:40 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Al Sobotka swinging the pus, and risking the wrath of the NHL—good on him

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 04/22/14 at 07:40 PM ET

Avatar

If they were wearing Cawks gears and decals, I think you’re okay.

Posted by SYF from Zata’s Epic Viking Beard on 04/22/14 at 07:39 PM ET

Yeah, it’s possible they weren’t necessarily in my way until I turned and put them in my path.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 04/22/14 at 07:40 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

game on

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/22/14 at 07:41 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

Al Sobotka swinging the pus, and risking the wrath of the NHL—good on him

And Tater is psyched. Strike early.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 04/22/14 at 07:41 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/22/14 at 07:41 PM ET

Primis's avatar

See you at intermission.

Posted by Primis on 04/22/14 at 07:41 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Why do we have to watch the badly dressed magician sing the national anthem in Baahston but no Karen Newman here… WTF?

Posted by calquake on 04/22/14 at 07:41 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Still looking for FSD…

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/14 at 07:42 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Quit with the over finesse. Just SHOOT the FUCHING PUCK!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/22/14 at 07:43 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Why do we have to watch the badly dressed magician sing the national anthem in Baahston but no Karen Newman here… WTF?

Posted by calquake on 04/22/14 at 07:41 PM ET

A total sham of a travesty of a disgrace, and almost certainly a crime against nature.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 04/22/14 at 07:43 PM ET

BrendonR's avatar

Looking good so far.

Posted by BrendonR on 04/22/14 at 07:43 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Why do we have to watch the badly dressed magician sing the national anthem in Baahston but no Karen Newman here… WTF?

Posted by calquake on 04/22/14 at 07:41 PM ET

Because Karen Newman’s too fuching hot for NBC’s delicate palates.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/14 at 07:44 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Why do we have to watch the badly dressed magician sing the national anthem in Baahston but no Karen Newman here… WTF?

Posted by calquake on 04/22/14 at 07:41 PM ET

Apologies in advan—aw, who the *#$%@& am I kidding?

I *#$%@& hate that guy. Does he even have any musical training? He’s not even singing actual notes half the time.

As an aside, tonight seemed like a good night to quit huffing air duster… prove me right, Wings.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 04/22/14 at 07:45 PM ET

BrendonR's avatar

My…god. I don’t even know what to feel there.

Posted by BrendonR on 04/22/14 at 07:46 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

*#$%@&’ Christ, pop ‘em!

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 04/22/14 at 07:46 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Damn Pavel, that was flat out Kindl-esque

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 04/22/14 at 07:46 PM ET

Avatar

Soderberg gets a slight push then drops to the ice like an anvil.  Nice

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 04/22/14 at 07:48 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

Damn Pavel, that was flat out Kindl-esque

I was thinkin Lilja, but yeah. Brutal.

Love the casual takedown by Jesus Lashof.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 04/22/14 at 07:48 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

that wasn’t good

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/22/14 at 07:48 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Times like these I wish Tootoo were on the active roster… they really need someone to wreck Marchand.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 04/22/14 at 07:48 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

Great feeds here…

http://www.wiziwig.tv/competition.php?part=sports&discipline=icehockey


Posted by pgoody on 04/22/14 at 07:49 PM ET

calquake's avatar

What is the crowd chanting?

Posted by calquake on 04/22/14 at 07:51 PM ET

VooX's avatar

http://nlds135.cdnak.neulion.com/nlds/nhl/redwings/as/live/redwings_hd_3000.m3u8

Paste this in options:
http-user-agent=PS4 libhttp/1.60

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/22/14 at 07:51 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Nice save, Dong.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/14 at 07:51 PM ET

VooX's avatar

What is the crowd chanting?
Posted by calquake on 04/22/14 at 07:51 PM ET

“Lucic sucks.”  or “Just Bleed.”
Tough to tell.

What are you bitches drinking?

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/22/14 at 07:52 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

What is the crowd chanting?

Ken says “Lucic Sucks”

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 04/22/14 at 07:52 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Paste this in options:
http-user-agent=PS4 libhttp/1.60

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/22/14 at 07:51 PM ET

Ahh, so they finally got a way around the “blocks”... good to know.

Thanks, unfinished-yet-still-released-accidentally PS4 GameCenter app!

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 04/22/14 at 07:52 PM ET

SYF's avatar

What are you bitches drinking?

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/22/14 at 07:52 PM ET

Guinness, you handsome bastard.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/14 at 07:53 PM ET

Bent's avatar

Oh come on.

Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 04/22/14 at 07:53 PM ET

Avatar

Only Boston’s allowed to play briefly with 6 skaters.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 04/22/14 at 07:53 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

What are you bitches drinking?

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/22/14 at 07:52 PM ET

Anything that moves.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 04/22/14 at 07:53 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

What are you bitches drinking?

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 04/22/14 at 07:52 PM ET

A bottle of 11.5% California Moscato.

Shut up, I have to take it easy for a while.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 04/22/14 at 07:53 PM ET

Avatar

I feel like I’m seeing nothing but wrong decision after wrong decision…or bad pass after bad pass.

Posted by CrimsonPhoenix on 04/22/14 at 07:54 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Thanks bitches… I’ll have PBR and a slab a of cheddar please.

Posted by calquake on 04/22/14 at 07:54 PM ET

MoreShoot's avatar

Evenin bitches. Wings look a little nervous early. need to settle down( except for Franzen, who needs to wake the fuch up).

Posted by MoreShoot on 04/22/14 at 07:54 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

Jimmy handling the puck is an epic fail.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 04/22/14 at 07:55 PM ET

SYF's avatar

brb, 19.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/14 at 07:55 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

Guh, terrible change. Early on the ice and lazy to the bench by Legwand

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 04/22/14 at 07:55 PM ET

Avatar

Are you sure that wouldn’t have been a good no-call Douche Canoe?  Everything Sunday seemed to be that way.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 04/22/14 at 07:56 PM ET

« Previous        < 1 2 3 4 >  Last ›      Next »

Add a Comment

Please limit embedded image or media size to 575 pixels wide.

Add your own avatar by joining Kukla's Korner, or logging in and uploading one in your member control panel.

Captchas bug you? Join KK or log in and you won't have to bother.

Smileys

Notify me of follow-up comments?

Feed

Most Recent Blog Posts

About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com