Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Eastward Bound Via Bullet Bob

It all comes back to Seger, back to Bullet Bob. Because it must. It's been decreed for 8 years.  Seger will guide us we'll follow him blindly.

We're going to see some old friends because Seger told us it's good for our soul. We've headed East because he said that a change would do us good.

On to the East because it makes sense. And it should have happened a decade ago back when our shrew commissioner told us it would. But he lied because that's what shrews do.  He lied like my babysitter did when I was six. That skank. I told her that all I wanted was to watch the damn Jerry Lewis Movie Marathon on Channel 25 in Saginaw at 4pm and she said she'd come get me when it was on but every time I asked what time it was she'd say "about that time" and I'd go back into my room and I missed the whole damn thing because her fat ass wanted to watch soaps. 

Well? It's about that time.

Jimmy D and Mr. I and Tick Tock? They're too smart to let it out, but I'll say it: we were promised the East but the East didn't come because Bettman was too busy riding the backs of the Winged Wheel to inflate the bullshit teams in places like Nashville, Phoenix, and Columbus. He was too busy helping hockey-dumb owners in Anaheim, LA, San Jose rake in the cash by doubling prices every time the Wings and our transplants hit town.

Well, see ya. And Good Frigging Riddance.  Because we're eastbound where we belonged years ago.
And as we leave? You can kiss our asses in Denver. Pucker up with your two bogus Cups, your idiotically retired sweaters, your spritzers and your oh-it's-so-tough-to-sleep beat writers. Suck it.  Take your statue of liberty and your 7-0 ass kicking in a game seven, take your Lemieuxs and your "footers" your Floppas, your endless youth movements, your carousel of coaches and your 6 fans..and shove them up your mile high Quebec stealing asses.

As we leave? You scumbags in St. Louis can suck it too.  Your "fuch Detroits"? Ha. Fuch you. Again. Every time. Every playoff series. Every Cup we've raised? Suck it. Take your Pall Malls and hand them to your sister/cousins.  We owned your asses for twenty years and you have nothing to show for it but bitterness and bile.  See ya.

Screw the West. Bring on the East.

Bring us your Rosbys, your fake captains with the "Made in Gary's Fantasy" tramp stamps. Bring us your Charas and watch him chase Datsyuk like a pregnant moose.  Bring us your badass "physical play" and watch your golden Swede defector pot PP goal after goal.

It's on now.  On to the East where we should have been if not for a midget with an agenda.

It's a Live Blog, bitches.  With an Eastern slant like it should have been years ago.

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Comments

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monkey's avatar

I’m sure Sammy’s pectoral muscles don’t look that good, even though he’s been working on them all summer.

If Sammy’s pecs look that good, he should take his top off.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 10/02/13 at 06:30 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Indeed.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 10/02/13 at 07:30 PM ET

Whereabouts, if you don’t mind me asking?

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 10/02/13 at 06:31 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Also, I’d like to dedicate the first puck drop (as well as the next several drinks) of the Wings’ season to HockeyTown Todd… I missed the original posts, and was absolutely floored when I read them today.

Posted by RedMenace from aboard the Crazy Train on 10/02/13 at 07:30 PM ET

I was going to suggest the same thing. Great minds…...

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 10/02/13 at 06:32 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

If you need me I’ll be in my usual spot on the Hasek curled up on the floor in the fetal position.

Posted by calquake on 10/02/13 at 07:21 PM ET

I’ll be the one with the plethora of needles in my arms once the first significant Wing goes down in the second period with a multi-month injury.

I know. My mouth. It’s whorish, and needs to be shut.

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 10/02/13 at 06:32 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Also, I’d like to dedicate the first puck drop (as well as the next several drinks) of the Wings’ season to HockeyTown Todd… I missed the original posts, and was absolutely floored when I read them today.

Posted by RedMenace from aboard the Crazy Train on 10/02/13 at 07:30 PM ET

I’ll never see an eyepatch again without thinking about Gramps.  Luckily I got to meet him at H2H.

Posted by calquake on 10/02/13 at 06:32 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Great minds…...

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 10/02/13 at 07:32 PM ET

Holy shit, where?!

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 10/02/13 at 06:33 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

to HTT

“injuries and officiating”

>>clink<<

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 10/02/13 at 06:33 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Whereabouts, if you don’t mind me asking?

St. Clair County.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 10/02/13 at 06:33 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Thanks Red, and to all of you for your kind words.

Hoist one, or many, to Gramps.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 10/02/13 at 06:34 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

I’ll be the one with the plethora of needles in my arms once the first significant Wing goes down in the second period with a multi-month injury


As long as it’s Sammy.


Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 10/02/13 at 06:34 PM ET

monkey's avatar

I’ll be the one with the plethora of needles in my arms once the first significant Wing goes down in the second period with a multi-month injury.

Don’t worry, Sammy is already injured and Colaiacovo was bought out or died of malaria or something.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 10/02/13 at 06:34 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

No kidding Monkey.  I was raised in St. Clair County, Marine City.  Great place.  You’ll enjoy it.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 10/02/13 at 06:35 PM ET

monkey's avatar

No kidding Monkey.  I was raised in St. Clair County, Marine City.  Great place.  You’ll enjoy it

I was born and raised in the far northwest of Macomb County, so it’s like moving into my old backyard.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 10/02/13 at 06:36 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

I’ll never see an eyepatch again without thinking about Gramps.  Luckily I got to meet him at H2H.

Posted by calquake on 10/02/13 at 07:32 PM ET

concur

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 10/02/13 at 06:36 PM ET

monkey's avatar

I was born and raised in the far northwest of Macomb County, so it’s like moving into my old backyard.

Should say Northeast.  Wine working fast tonight.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 10/02/13 at 06:37 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 10/02/13 at 07:36 PM ET

Is that Gramps hitting on Johnny Galecki?

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 10/02/13 at 06:38 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

For those with VLC and want a stream that way? Go here:

http://www.reddit.com/r/hockey/comments/1nm4n4/game_thread_buffalo_sabres_000_0pts_vs_detroit/ccju27t

When it comes up. Just right look for streams, you’ll see buf, det. Just right click on the det one and save the url. Open VLC, Under Media at the top of the player, click on open network stream and simply paste the url you just copied and hit.. okay.

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 10/02/13 at 06:38 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

I was raised in St. Clair County, Marine City.  Great place.  You’ll enjoy it.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 10/02/13 at 07:35 PM ET

Worked with a guy from Marine City for four years up here. His drinking put most Yoopers to shame.

Is there something we should know?

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 10/02/13 at 06:38 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

RIP Gramps. This season is for you.

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 10/02/13 at 06:39 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Is that Gramps hitting on Johnny Galecki?

Posted by monkey from Finland on 10/02/13 at 07:38 PM ET

no, just VooX taken orders grin

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 10/02/13 at 06:39 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Whats that park on about 16 Mile Road on Lake St. Clair.  Lots of good times there.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 10/02/13 at 06:39 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

St. Clair County.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 10/02/13 at 07:33 PM ET

Neat, I have family right down I-94 in Fraser.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 10/02/13 at 06:40 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Whats that park on about 16 Mile Road on Lake St. Clair.  Lots of good times there.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 10/02/13 at 07:39 PM ET

Metropolitan Beach?

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

 

 

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 10/02/13 at 06:40 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Its all the chemicals from the St. Clair river that makes us all crazy!

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 10/02/13 at 06:41 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Might miss the beginning of the game…helping my nephew track his first bow buck…why he waited until the sun was nearly down to shoot the damn thing is beside me…..

I’m with you in spirit


LGRW!

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 10/02/13 at 06:42 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Metro Beach, thats it.  I confess i was never there at any time when i was totally intoxicated.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 10/02/13 at 06:42 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 10/02/13 at 07:38 PM ET

The quality of those streams, by the way, is phenomenal at 4500kbps… even though I paid for GameCenter Live, I’ll likely be using those if I have access to a PC. The difference between the 3000kbps and 4500kbps streams is night and day.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 10/02/13 at 06:43 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

^^ wasnt

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 10/02/13 at 06:43 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Its all the chemicals from the St. Clair river that makes us all crazy!

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 10/02/13 at 07:41 PM ET

Voox, I’ll have a tall glass of those chemicals please… with an umbrella of course.

Posted by calquake on 10/02/13 at 06:43 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Voox, I’ll have a tall glass of those chemicals please… with an umbrella of course.

Posted by calquake on 10/02/13 at 07:43 PM ET

Don’t forget the lime wedge.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 10/02/13 at 06:45 PM ET

Jennemy of the Skate's avatar

‘sup, bitches… LET’S GO RED WINGS! (clap, clap….clap, clap, clap)

Posted by Jennemy of the Skate from the bar car on the stress train on 10/02/13 at 06:45 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

^^ wasnt

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 10/02/13 at 07:43 PM ET

That’s a given OKie.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 10/02/13 at 06:45 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Don’t forget the lime wedge.

Posted by RedMenace from aboard the Crazy Train on 10/02/13 at 07:45 PM ET

You are a true friend Red.

Posted by calquake on 10/02/13 at 06:45 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Good hunting, Jeff.  Bring back an eight-pointer.

Thanks, RorSchach, for all of the links.  Tried to find FSD, but it appears that Olcsux’s Cawk-sucking smug face is more important to the league’s big dollar broadcasts.  Sheesh…

Let’s do this.  Go Wings.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 10/02/13 at 06:45 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

Oh, I know. Just took me so damn long to finally find one that worked. I don’t know how long it will be up for. But I’ll continue to search. I love it.

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 10/02/13 at 06:46 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

Holy crap! The lights are on in The Hasek.

Aloha bitches!

First hockeyball game and High Def to boot.

LGRW !!!!!

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, with 3 fingers of rum & a cigar.. on 10/02/13 at 06:46 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Piña colada’s for everyone!

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 10/02/13 at 06:46 PM ET

calquake's avatar

‘sup, bitches… LET’S GO RED WINGS! (clap, clap….clap, clap, clap)

Posted by Jennemy of the Skate from putting the b*tches in the box on 10/02/13 at 07:45 PM ET

Jennemy in da house!  Whoop whoop!

Posted by calquake on 10/02/13 at 06:47 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Piña colada’s for everyone!

Posted by monkey from Finland on 10/02/13 at 07:46 PM ET

And Coronas.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 10/02/13 at 06:48 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

‘sup, bitches… LET’S GO RED WINGS! (clap, clap….clap, clap, clap)

Posted by Jennemy of the Skate from the bar car on the stress train on 10/02/13 at 07:45 PM ET


Nice to see ya Jennemy.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 10/02/13 at 06:49 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com