Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Does the Fun Ever Start?

Once again it's time for some "Red Wings Hockey..."

... and I think that loosely translates to "Play for 20 minutes or so, let the opposition walk all over you, then lose in extra time," right? Are you having as much trouble not soiling your Pavel Datsyuk Underoos with excitement as I am? Is your Everclear-soaked brainpan ready for the sheer brilliance in store for us tonight? If my cynicism seems excessive, I'm still recovering from a less-than-stellar weekend, so you'll have to forgive me.

Or not, it's up to you. I really can't care.

So here's the deal: The Wings haven't won in what seems like a Howe's age; to make matters worse, the last, like, 37 losses (in a row?) have been in overtime or Gary's Gimmick. Of course, that somewhat lessens the agony of defeat with the much-maligned "loser points."

Notice I said, "somewhat."

I don't know about the rest of you degenerate reprobates, but I'm ready for a freaking win. Overtime, shootout, regulation -- hell, call the game after the first period because all the pucks get lost in the black hole that is the space between Barry Trotz' head and chest -- I don't really care at this point. Obviously I'm no neuropsychopharmacologist, and I don't have access to the A2Y interns (yet....), but someone has to do something -- ANYTHING -- to rid us of this horrid affliction. Put Smith at forward, put him in the other team's sweater, unretire TPH, give him Smith's number, and make Smitty "disappear" for a while -- whatever it takes.

Just. Fvcking. Win.

It's time to numb the pain with some narcotics, some hard liquor, and a Live Blog, Bitches.

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Comments

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calquake's avatar

I’ll be 50 or 60 minutes behind.

Ain’t technology great.

Posted by calquake on 11/19/13 at 07:54 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Me likey Cheli!

Let’s Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 11/19/13 at 07:54 PM ET

Bent's avatar

Evening everyone.  A PP goal would be great here.

Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 11/19/13 at 07:59 PM ET

Avatar

Oh man. D and Z deserved a goal there. That was beautiful.

Posted by CrimsonPhoenix on 11/19/13 at 08:00 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

“Dang it,” says Mick, after the replay of Kong’s injury.  That’s putting it mildly.

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 11/19/13 at 08:05 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Mickey with an E-52 reference.

Let’s Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 11/19/13 at 08:10 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Hate to say it but the Wings look like a very average hockey team.

Posted by calquake on 11/19/13 at 08:16 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

20 minutes down…..no score, 40 more minutes for a chance to Win!

Lets Go Re Wings!!!!!

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 11/19/13 at 08:17 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

hope we here a favorable Kong update soon ...

please?

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 11/19/13 at 08:20 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Okay, before I refresh the page, I wasn’t going for THAT much of an “anything” to make a difference regarding Kong. *#$%@&.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 11/19/13 at 08:21 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

keating with the “DD update ... after the break” teaser

blank stare

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 11/19/13 at 08:23 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Making us wait for an update. Trickery.

Let’s Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 11/19/13 at 08:24 PM ET

cigar_nurse's avatar

Hola bitches. So DD hurt? Why couldn’t that preediturd hit Smith or Q instead?
Hope you are wrong RW but that didn’t look good at all.

They ask Smith about DD injury as the gist of the interview.  Classic.

Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 11/19/13 at 08:24 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Changing my feed.  I got the NBCSN broadcast.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 11/19/13 at 08:26 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

So, listening to Smith speak in that interview, my armchair analysis is this:

Smith needs to SLOOOOOOOOOOOOOW THE *#$%@& DOOOOOOOOOOOWWWWWWWN. His mind is working faster than his body can keep up, and that may be why he makes so many damned mistakes with the puck—especially under pressure.

Yep, definitely need to refill the Firefart Fizzbitch.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 11/19/13 at 08:27 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

ratz

my guess?
2 weeks ... minimum

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 11/19/13 at 08:27 PM ET

SYF's avatar

ratz

my guess?
2 weeks ... minimum

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 11/19/13 at 08:27 PM ET

Good guess, stoney.  I’m thinking the same.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 11/19/13 at 08:28 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

This intermission crew and camera angles are creepy as hell.

Let’s Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 11/19/13 at 08:29 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Good guess, stoney.  I’m thinking the same.

Posted by SYF from minding the gap on 11/19/13 at 08:28 PM ET

i’d rather you tell me i’m crazy and he’ll be back by the weekend

 

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 11/19/13 at 08:30 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Words that make my head explode: “Good news!” Followed by “Brendan Smith back in the lineup….”

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 11/19/13 at 08:31 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Words that make my head explode: “Good news!” Followed by “Brendan Smith back in the lineup….”

Posted by RedMenace from Team Slovaskimo Fighting Snipers on 11/19/13 at 08:31 PM ET

kinda like an oxymoron, aye?

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 11/19/13 at 08:33 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Mr. Ouellet to the white courtesy phone please… Mr. Ouellet to the white courtesy phone.

Posted by calquake on 11/19/13 at 08:34 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

kinda like an oxymoron, aye?

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 11/19/13 at 08:33 PM ET

O_o

Dafuq did you just call me?

wink

Sorry, I’m trying to drink away being dumped (again, and for the final time)... so far the only thing that’s been successful is the “drinking” part.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 11/19/13 at 08:35 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Mr. Ouellet to the white courtesy phone please… Mr. Ouellet to the white courtesy phone.

Posted by calquake on 11/19/13 at 08:34 PM ET

I haven’t watched any of the Griffins games (yet), but I’d like to see Sproul for a game or two.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 11/19/13 at 08:36 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

“Left shoulder injury.  Won’t be back.”

downer

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 11/19/13 at 08:37 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Sorry, I’m trying to drink away being dumped (again, and for the final time)...

Ready to switch sides? cheese  Just kidding Red, getting dumped always sucks.  Sorry.

Posted by calquake on 11/19/13 at 08:37 PM ET

Bent's avatar

Missed the intermission, what’s the 65DD news?

Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 11/19/13 at 08:38 PM ET

Bent's avatar

“Left shoulder injury.  Won’t be back.”

So, basically what we figured already.  That sucks.

Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 11/19/13 at 08:39 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

DD updates from TMR.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 11/19/13 at 08:39 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Ready to switch sides?   Just kidding Red, getting dumped always sucks.  Sorry.

Posted by calquake on 11/19/13 at 08:37 PM ET

Nah, just the same girl, 3rd time. I told her “the next time you say you need space/time/physics, you’re going to get it whether you really want it or not…” and she said it.

So here I sit, a broken and battered man.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 11/19/13 at 08:39 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

So sorry, RedMenace.

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 11/19/13 at 08:42 PM ET

Avatar

What the hell is Ericsson thinking? You’re not allowed to knock guys down in HOCKEY.

Posted by CrimsonPhoenix on 11/19/13 at 08:45 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

So sorry, RedMenace.

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 11/19/13 at 08:42 PM ET

Eh, it happens… I’m not mad at her or anything; she really does need to figure herself out, and I’ll help in any way I can.

Thank you, though.

Christ on a carousel, James got beat clean.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 11/19/13 at 08:45 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Did Mick just say, “The dreaded hooker?”  Hahaha

Posted by calquake on 11/19/13 at 08:45 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Nah, just the same girl, 3rd time.

Posted by RedMenace from Team Slovaskimo Fighting Snipers on 11/19/13 at 08:39 PM ET

So she’s a 3 time loser. You’re better off, man.(hope I’m not being too outta line)


Let’s Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 11/19/13 at 08:46 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

Remember when it wasn’t a question of if we would win, but more a question of by how much?

I know, times like those don’t last, but it sure was fun

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 11/19/13 at 08:50 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Sorry ‘bout the heartbreak, RedM.  Girls, right?

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 11/19/13 at 08:50 PM ET

cigar_nurse's avatar

Sorry Red. Don’t give up. Breakups happen for reasons we may not know at the time but make sense later in life. Ms Right is still out there waiting for you.

Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 11/19/13 at 08:51 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

That bobble head’s head is too small for Dangle. That’s what I said.

Let’s Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 11/19/13 at 08:53 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Wings actually got a call in our favor?  No shit…

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 11/19/13 at 08:53 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com