Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Digging Monday

Aloha bitches.  This post will evolve over the next little bit, but I wanted to give you this ditty to start with.  Khan(!)'s got himself a scoop and, in typical Digger fashion, attributes it to no one but his immense knowledge of the organ-I-zation.

Ever since Nicklas Lidstrom announced his retirement on May 31, it was fairly obvious would who replace him as Detroit Red Wings captain.Now that the NHL lockout has ended, the Red Wings soon will announce that Henrik Zetterberg will be their next captain.

Read more here, but it's a quickie.  Straightforward and not shocking.  More to follow. Lots of stuff out there we need to discuss.  As you might have guessed, I've decided to just march happily on and pretend it's like September or something.

Helene St. James has a pipeline straight to some flat-out domestic frivolity.  Allegedly she's meal planning for the Kronwalls, DVR'ing kids programs for the Clearys, helping Tick Tock pick out his ties and going all Mrs. Doubtfire for the entire franchise.  

"I'm thrilled for the fans, excited for our game and everybody involved that we're back on the ice," Wings general manager Ken Holland said Sunday. He awoke around 5:30 a.m., just as news broke of the accord.

Defenseman Niklas Kronwall woke up around the same time and said the first thing he did after finding out the news on his iPhone app was to tell his girlfriend. Forward Daniel Cleary yelled out the news to his wife and daughters and was greeted by "screaming and jumping up and down," he said.

Awesome.  Hockey's back. Wings are ready, boy.  And I'll be damned if we don't need to know just how Nik Kronwall woke up.  There's an app for that, bitches.  Helene says so.

Helene also provides a riveting review of Gary's three work stoppages, his legacy. And then there's some fun chit chat from Kronwall in there, calling it a "fair deal" for everyone.  Except for, you know...um, yeah.  I'm happy.  Hockey's back.  Rainbows baby. Puppies.

Oh and the Wings, our Wings, are opening up at...

...11-to-1 to win their fifth Stanley Cup since 1997.

That is tied for the sixth-best odds in the NHL. The Pittsburgh Penguins lead the way with 6-to-1 odds to win it all.

The New York Rangers and Vancouver Canucks are next with 8-to-1 odds, followed by the Boston Bruins at 9-to-1 and the Los Angeles Kings, the defending Stanley Cup champions, at 10-to-1.

The Red Wings are tied at 11-to-1 with the division-rival Chicago Blackhawks and St. Louis Blues.

The whole division, essentially, is favored to win the Cup...along with Pittsburgh, with Thid's odds to regain "his Cup" mandated in the new CBA.

Teddy Kulfan has clearly had this lead written for months.  I mean, he probably had some early rough drafts, crumpled them, re-wrote, crafted, ruminated, stressed, typed and drank a little.  Because this? This is the shit.

The Red Wings haven't had an actual game since losing Game 5 of the first round of the playoffs in Nashville on April 20.

Ok. The interns are still researching to verify that.  I'm tempted to just blindly agree but you know how particular we are about facts (and have been for 8 years...happy belated anniversary to us all).

Kulfan provides a recap of the roster we'll live with (11-1 odds, don't forget) and finds a way to work 732 Lidstrom references into 7 paragraphs about the blue line.

Jonathan Ericsson: With no Nicklas Lidstrom, Ericsson is one of the young defensemen needed to take on a bigger role.

Niklas Kronwall: With Lidstrom retiring, Kronwall becomes the Red Wings’ No. 1 defenseman.

Ian White: The latest of a long line of Red Wings defensemen who thrived when paired with Lidstrom.

Sidney Crosby: Now that Lidstrom is gone, Crosby becomes the best defenseman in the NHL (mandated by the new CBA). 

Ok. I wrote that last one.  Sorry.

Teddy tackles the whole team, boy.  The entire team just like a real beat writer.  Here...look.

Damien Brunner: The undrafted free agent has excelled in Switzerland with his goal scoring. The Wings love his hands and maybe he developed chemistry with Zetterberg while playing him during the lockout.

Yes. Maybe. Teddy also flatly states that Homer won't be back.  No attribution. Just fact.  I agree but, you know, journalism...it's a bitch.

The last time we gave Drew Sharp any real attention he responded with this little ditty.

Bill—With all due discretion, I really don’t care what fans or bloggers think. Fans have an emotional connection to a team. I don’t. That’s why I can look at a situation more objectively.

'Member?  Well, he might not "care" what we think but he sure doesn't have any problem telling us precisely what he thinks we should think.

But there should be a symbolic gesture from the fans that although they’ll forgive, they can’t forget the recklessness of those entrusted with building as well as protecting the sport.

When the NHL returns, every fan should stand up in their seats and turn their backs away from the action for the first couple minutes of the first game back.

Do what they did to you.

Turn your backs on them.

He's just keeping it real.  I mean, come on, that's a solution right there.  That's, what...viable.  JFC.  Be pissed. Whine a bit.  Don't watch if you don't want to.  But spare me the drama, princess.  That's just dumb.

Ok then.  Welcome back hockey. Welcome back, 19.  Welcome back joy and puppies, a few hookers and some cheap, warm PBR to wash it all down.  Look elsewhere for numbers related to the new CBA. I don't care about them.  

The road to 12 starts, finally....now.

Filed in: | Abel to Yzerman | Permalink
 

Comments

 1 2 >       Next »

Mandingo's avatar



“Can I ask a practical question at this point? Does Hudler go into the HHOF as a Flame or a Red Wing?”

Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 01/07/13 at 10:56 AM ET

gowings's avatar

I missed reading you!  Now lets us hope that the Wings will do well so we have even more things to cheer about!

Posted by gowings from MTL on 01/07/13 at 11:05 AM ET

Avatar

wayyyy too young to be captain!

Posted by gretzky_to_lemieux on 01/07/13 at 11:12 AM ET

w2j2's avatar

Chief: 
Congratulations on 8 years for A2Y!
That must be a record or something.
Let’s order up some cheddar to go with our PBR!

Posted by w2j2 on 01/07/13 at 11:17 AM ET

Avatar

Z as captain is fine.  I don’t think that surprises anybody, but I don’t think anybody is ever going to confuse him as a C with the last couple guys who’ve worn it, either.

I think a season or two as something besides a presumptive front-runner is going to be great for the team.  They’ve got a bunch of youth up front and they have some interesting potential.

I don’t give them much chance to do anything this year, because a shortened season hurts the teams who have had the most turnover, and the Wings are going to have a lot of turnover at a lot of high-profile positions.

I do think having Howard and Gustavsson is going to be a big help this year considering how compressed the schedule is going to be.

All of that said, a season this short is pretty much Keno.  It’s impossible to figure out what’s going to happen and impossible to draw any conclusions from what does.

Posted by HockeyinHD on 01/07/13 at 11:18 AM ET

SnLO's avatar

But there should be a symbolic gesture from the fans

I kind of envision the first short-season game played inside empty barns of each of the teams. No fans show up. Just crickets. That would be tits.

Posted by SnLO from beyond the M-1 on 01/07/13 at 11:23 AM ET

Rdwings28's avatar

some of this to look forward to

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=5h55X3uJU84

Posted by Rdwings28 on 01/07/13 at 11:25 AM ET

w2j2's avatar

Welcome back, William Tell…. I think all our other forwards should be wearing cages.

The first time some A hole blows one of those tootoo train whistles, I am going to throw a hammer into my TV.

Posted by w2j2 on 01/07/13 at 11:28 AM ET

joedaiceman's avatar

I’m not sure if the worst part of the lockout was no hockey - or was in no A2Y? Really no contest - A2Y was the hardest part.

Posted by joedaiceman on 01/07/13 at 11:33 AM ET

Rdwings28's avatar

the Datsuyk video listen for the “Fantastika!!!” at 30 secs.

Posted by Rdwings28 on 01/07/13 at 11:35 AM ET

hockeychic's avatar

It sure is good to read you again Chief.  Been a long, wild ride these 8 years!

I am so ready for the season.

Let’s go Red Wings!!!!

Posted by hockeychic from Denver, CO on 01/07/13 at 11:43 AM ET

Itrusteddrrahmani's avatar

Can’t wait for Bettman to step on the ice in Hockeytown this June. I can’t imagine the amount of booing.

Posted by Itrusteddrrahmani from Nyc by way of A2 on 01/07/13 at 11:44 AM ET

LivinLaVidaLockout's avatar

I kind of envision the first short-season game played inside empty barns of each of the teams. No fans show up. Just crickets. That would be tits.
Posted by SnLO from the Empty Barn on Civic Center Drive on 01/07/13 at 10:23 AM ET

I wish…

I paid the Wings for my tickets back in April, and there is no mechanism for me to return them.  Therefore, I’ll be there cheering on my team like all the other Red Wings-starved dogs.

Posted by LivinLaVidaLockout on 01/07/13 at 11:49 AM ET

jennyquarx's avatar

Hank will be a great Captain (capitalized), just like the last two.

You know, I thought things were okay without NHL hockey.  I was angry about the whole WC thing.  It would have been rad to see you guys and raise megabucks for DMC.  But I spent a lot of time with my family, found other things to do.

Then the whole CT thing happened (let’s not go there), and I realized how much more the NHL is to me.  I have a six year old.  That was traumatizing.  And everyone who would have been posting Datsyuk highlights (hell, I would have taken Doanface highlights at that point), were rehashing it OVER and OVER and OVER, and I realized that NHL hockey is my “blankie” as it were against the horrible things that happen in the world. I don’t want to watch the news.  I don’t want to hear about politics or argue about things (other than my team rules, your team drools).  I want to watch the NHL Network 24 hours a day, obsess about the Red Wings, over analyze everything I have no control over, smack talk other fan bases, taunt fellow fans when things get rough, etc.  I’m not even mad anymore.  Yeah, they fuched us.  Whatever.  It’s over.  Thankfully.  We don’t have control over that either.  You think not watching is going to fix that?  If that’s your jam, go for it.  I love you guys too.  But that’s not for me.  I want my blankie.  Thanks for giving it back.

Posted by jennyquarx on 01/07/13 at 12:25 PM ET

dougie's avatar

The first time some A hole blows one of those tootoo train whistles, I am going to throw a hammer into my TV.

Posted by w2j2 on 01/07/13 at 10:28 AM ET

When I heard about the lockout ending, my first thought was “AllRIGHT, I get to watch the Red Wings again.”

My second thought was “oh, FUCH, Jordin Tootoo is now a Red Wing.”

Too soon to be hatin’?

Posted by dougie on 01/07/13 at 12:32 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

The road to 12 starts, finally….now.

All aboard the Too-Too Train. Bitches.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/07/13 at 12:37 PM ET

mrfluffy's avatar

Posted by dougie on 01/07/13 at 11:32 AM ET

I’m excited for Smith being a Red Wing.

I don’t mind Tootoo being a Red Wing.

I hate Lidstrom and Holmstrom NOT being a Red Wing.

I hate Holland for NOT addressing a defensive crater on the Red Wings.

Whoa, it’s like it’s…July 2012 all over again.

Posted by mrfluffy from A wide spot on I-90 in Montana on 01/07/13 at 12:42 PM ET

LivinLaVidaLockout's avatar

All aboard the Too-Too Train. Bitches.
Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

I “Too-Too-Toose” You.
Happy Valentines

Posted by LivinLaVidaLockout on 01/07/13 at 12:44 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

My God Drew Sharp is stupid.

Let’s protest by buying tix to the first game, $6 hot dogs and $8 beer, take our seats, then as the puck is about to be dropped TURN OUR BACKS UNTIL THE NEXT FACE OFF!!!!!!  (I put that last part in there, obviously, Drew I’m sure does not know what a face off is).

BY GOD THAT WILL SHOW THEM !!!!

In the words of Debra Barone, “Idiot”.  (without hockey there has been time to watch reruns of “Raymond” - very funny show)

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 01/07/13 at 12:46 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Chief, that is the first time I actually went to a Drew Sharp article that you linked, and it will be the last.  I don’t need to get any dumber.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 01/07/13 at 12:57 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Most importantly, glad you’re back, as others have stated, and glad to see all the other Bitches in here!

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 01/07/13 at 12:59 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

The road to 12 starts, finally….now.

All aboard the Too-Too Train. Bitches.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/07/13 at 11:37 AM ET

Way.  Too.  Soon…

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 01/07/13 at 01:09 PM ET

MoreShoot's avatar

> My second thought was “oh, FUCH, Jordin Tootoo is now a Red Wing.”

Third thought: Crap, Homer is going away.

Posted by MoreShoot on 01/07/13 at 01:12 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

I’ve missed you guys.  I knew I’d be back.  Here, take my money.  I am that fan.  Can’t wait.  Glad to see most of you are back too.

Posted by jennyquarx on 01/07/13 at 11:11 AM ET

I have told people ( well, typed, because who communicates socially with spoken words any more? ) the same thing, people will be back despite all the deservedly pissed-off talk.

I resolved way back when, that I would be back, full-on, from the first game, if there ever was another one, and I will be.

I’m telling you most everyone will be, and from the start, and those who aren’t will be sooner or later.  Owners will sell high profit margin playoff tix out the wazoo.

As Hyman Roth said about Moe Green being shot through the glasses, ” I didn’t ask who gave the order, because I knew.  It was just business. “

 

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 01/07/13 at 01:18 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Third thought: Crap, Homer is going away.

Fourth thought: What was the question?  Oh look… a quarter.

Posted by calquake on 01/07/13 at 01:20 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Master Chief, I am really glad you’re back.

And I’m glad our Red Wings are back.

And if anyone saw me say on Twitter that I agreed with Evil Drew, it was in that I thought there should be some gesture of displeasure directed at the NHL.  My suggestion was that no one attend the first home game in any arena.  I see others have had the same idea.

But as jennyquarx said, “Whatever.  It’s over.”  And I’ll do what I said back when the lockout started that I would do:  I will follow my beloved Red Wings as best I can without ever giving any more money to the NHL.  So…  Ken Kal and Paul Woods will be my best friends unless the Wings are on (gulp) NBC or NBCSports. 

I won’t be able to live blog because the radio broadcast is always way behind the TV feed.  But I’ll be with all of you in spirit.

LET’S GO RED WINGS !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 01/07/13 at 01:21 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

I’m already aboard the Tootoo train, but I hope any person who blows a goddamn train whistle for him accidentally prolapses his or her anus for the trouble.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 01/07/13 at 01:22 PM ET

GrahamWIIM's avatar

Maybe people should perform a symbolic gesture of Drew’s column by opening the page and then walking away.

Posted by GrahamWIIM from Chicago via Toronto on 01/07/13 at 01:25 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

ANNNNDD, since the first game hasn’t started yet this season, let’s be Wings fans and get paranoid about the Cap for 13-14!

The Wings will need to sign Jimmy Howard, 3 defensemen, and 4 forwards, approximately, give or take 1.

They will have $19,000,000 available to stay under the $64,300,000 Cap for 13-14, for Jimmy and 7 others.

The next season, 2014-15,  they will have to resign Datsyuk based on his current $6.7M, unless he plays in Russia.  I don’t see that happening at his early 30s age.  Great to get past one crisis and already start fiddling with the next one.

(hey, good thing they didn’t commit $20M a year to just two players, neither dominant players, eh?)

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 01/07/13 at 01:33 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

I’m already aboard the Tootoo train, but I hope any person who blows a goddamn train whistle for him accidentally prolapses his or her anus for the trouble.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 01/07/13 at 12:22 PM ET

Yup, after 24 hours of shock and disbelief last July I jumped on board with this.  We’ll have to look past the dumb penalties.  It’s a fine line between playing with the edge that the Wings want him to, and being stupid.

Maybe he can kick Riley Sheahan in the nuts and warn him about alcohol abuse.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 01/07/13 at 01:39 PM ET

dougie's avatar

ANNNNDD, since the first game hasn’t started yet this season, let’s be Wings fans and get paranoid about the Cap for 13-14!

Captain Obvious sez that any team worth a shit (and a number of teams who aren’t) will be in the same boat.

Posted by dougie on 01/07/13 at 01:55 PM ET

dougie's avatar

So who are the Wings gonna buy out of their contracts? How many did they settle on in the new CBA, one or two?

Posted by dougie on 01/07/13 at 01:59 PM ET

Mandingo's avatar

So who are the Wings gonna buy out of their contracts? How many did they settle on in the new CBA, one or two?

Posted by dougie on 01/07/13 at 12:59 PM ET

Two.

My preference would be Franzen as their first buyout. And then Franzen again as their second buyout, just to make sure.

Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 01/07/13 at 02:08 PM ET

Avatar

Posted by dougie on 01/07/13 at 12:59 PM ET

I believe each team has two, but I don’t see the Wings buying anyone out.  They’re well under the cap this year and next year.

Posted by Garth on 01/07/13 at 02:27 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

My preference would be Franzen as their first buyout. And then Franzen again as their second buyout, just to make sure.

Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 01/07/13 at 01:08 PM ET

Me likey! You always manage to come up with some of the best ideas, Mandingo.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/07/13 at 02:37 PM ET

dougie's avatar

I believe each team has two, but I don’t see the Wings buying anyone out.  They’re well under the cap this year and next year.

Posted by Garth on 01/07/13 at 01:27 PM ET

But wouldn’t you buy out Franzen anyway? Just to get out of the length of the term, performance questions aside?

Posted by dougie on 01/07/13 at 02:39 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Thanks, Chief. This place is starting to make me feel warm all over again ...

... wait ... what?

right,

No. 12 in ‘13!

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 01/07/13 at 02:45 PM ET

HeilThom's avatar

Welcome back, Chief!

Posted by HeilThom from Hockeytown, USA on 01/07/13 at 02:50 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

My preference would be Franzen as their first buyout. And then Franzen again as their second buyout, just to make sure.

Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 01/07/13 at 01:08 PM ET

Now that is funny.  Or sad.

$4,000,000 until 2020, and by that I mean EACH YEAR until 2020.

Look for Franzen to come back with a vengeance and high motivation!  You’ll be disappointed, but go ahead and look for it.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 01/07/13 at 03:26 PM ET

Surfer Ken's avatar

My preference would be Franzen as their first buyout. And then Franzen again as their second buyout, just to make sure.

ABSOLUTELY

Its been so long I dont remember who we have and dont have.  Your telling me Hudler is a Flame and Sammy is a Wing again?  I might have known that once but…... man my mind is getting old.  What about Eves?  Is he ready to go?  Im so confused.

 

Posted by Surfer Ken from San Clemente on 01/07/13 at 04:00 PM ET

 1 2 >       Next »

Add a Comment

Please limit embedded image or media size to 575 pixels wide.

Add your own avatar by joining Kukla's Korner, or logging in and uploading one in your member control panel.

Captchas bug you? Join KK or log in and you won't have to bother.

Smileys

Notify me of follow-up comments?

Feed

Most Recent Blog Posts

About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com