Abel to Yzerman
by IwoCPO on 12/15/10 at 07:59 PM ET
Here’s a great stat that I found myself. The Wings haven’t lost on my birthday since 1991. And today’s my birthday. And 2010 minus 1991 is 19. And I have no idea if that’s true. But really? Who cares if it is or not? Seriously. When has that really mattered here?
You know what does matter? Keeping the Bitter Bitches down where they belong. Watching them wallow in the swill that is life as a Bitter Bitch Blues fan. That is what we do here when the kids tell us to keep it realz.
So we’ll live blog this thing on my birthday and you’ll celebrate with warm beer and cheddar and those obnoxious firetrucks will scream down your avenues and they’ll terrify the house painters and then the puppies will start to frolic but it’s sooooo cold that they’ll run inside to warm themselves by the fire where the hookers will be dancing with life-size Bertuzzi voodoo dolls but they’re scared shitless because he’s a serial killer. Dancing with Dahmer is not a life choice, it’s a problem, bitch. A big, motherfuching problem.
So, here we go. Of all our little brothers, this one resents us the most. And my god I love it when the Wings beat him down. And on my birthday. A birthday bash of a Bitter Baby Bumbling Blowinglunch Blues beatdown because by god Baby Jebus wants it that way. Bitches.
Put your jammies on, grab a PBR and pray to the adorable one for a win so that when I read your comments to this Live Blog they’re not filled with the kind of pessimism you and I are famous for.
It’s a Live Blog, bitches.
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About Abel to Yzerman
Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977. No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y. Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation. There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature. Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: firstname.lastname@example.org