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Abel to Yzerman

All Is Well…Gary Says The Playoffs Start Tonite

In a stunning decision from the NHL front office in Pittsburgh, midget commissioner Gary.Ass Bettman announced just moments ago that Sidney Crosby has been named Cosmopolitan Magazine's Man of the Decade and that the NHL playoffs will start this evening. First round matchups will be announced thirty minutes before game times.  If any visiting team can't make it to their scheduled game, that round will be postponed until the new glossy Crosby posters have been completely reviewed in Bettman's private office, with soft lighting.

None of that is true, except the part about Bettman being a midget, the Cosmo award for Rosby, the poster thing and the soft lighting.  So, the playoffs aren't really starting tonite.

But if they were?

The Wings would be playing Vancouver.  Is that some sort of crazy-ass coincidence or what?

Nuts.

Two of them. If Luongo has those, he's in tonite because of the violation Detroit levied upon him the last time out.

Whatever. The Wings, because they did last night, can score on the power play, win on the road and profess allegiance to their coach.

It's a late one and I'm guessing, maybe, two of you are sober. Have at it, by god.  It's a Live Blog, bitches. 

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Comments

 1 2 3 >  Last ›      Next »

Chet's avatar

i have *#$%@& uverse and so…need a feed.

Posted by Chet from twitter: thegansen on 03/16/13 at 08:50 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Thanks, Chief

another 2

.. and some more dats dekes

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/16/13 at 08:51 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

I’m listening to the Michigan/Western game, which Michigan leads 5-1 early in the third.  I think someone said this last night in the LB, but I’ll say it again.  If this year’s Michigan team can turn things around the way they have, the Wings sure as hell can too.

I’m recording the game to watch in the AM.  Too tired to stay up.  Have fun, y’all.

LET’S GO RED WINGS !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 03/16/13 at 08:56 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

I’m a masochist - so I’m in tonight.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 03/16/13 at 09:00 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

FEED

normally FSD but do not know yet.

NHL Live or something like that right now.

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/16/13 at 09:07 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Hey all, Finally a night with no plans that I can LB.  Wife and I used a gift card at bevmo so the pregame is in full swing. Drinking sunflowers, some olde pre-prohibition cocktail (allegedly). Damn good stuff.

Can ya interpolate that for us non pharmacists Cap’n? Kate is spot on with the ethnocentric Babbletispeak. Probably hates Hakan Andersson for bringing this team all of its Eurotrash players. Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 03/16/13 at 06:35 PM ET

CN, Kate’s comments on Babs jingosim reminded me of Don Cherry, so Cherrycock of Babcherry. And the latin was a riff off of SNL’s “if it’s not scottish, it’s crap,” but Canadian of course.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/16/13 at 09:13 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

  It’s a Live Blog, bitches.

Evenin’ Bitches. Until my circadian rhythms gel with the DST my old bones still think it’s one hour earlier so, I’m in too.

If it’s not Datsyuk, it’s crap.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

 

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/16/13 at 09:23 PM ET

Riviera's avatar

Starting my St. Patty’s day festivities early here on the almost left coast. Serve it up bitches!

Posted by Riviera from Phoenix on 03/16/13 at 09:27 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

Mmmm… soon Corn Beef and Cabbage.

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/16/13 at 09:30 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

Evening and Pre “Erin Go Bragh” for all the Irish or those that wish to celebrate St. Patricks Day!

Looking for some more Magic tonight,  + 2 points would be Nice!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 03/16/13 at 09:30 PM ET

NIVO's avatar

love the gay jerseys Vancootie yuk yuk!

Game On!

Posted by NIVO from underpants gnome village on 03/16/13 at 09:38 PM ET

Gary A$$ SUCK !!'s avatar

Hejsan Svejsan !!!
Lets Go Red Wings! Clap Clap Clap

Posted by Gary A$$ SUCK !! from Fort Myers, Florida on 03/16/13 at 09:39 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Evening Bitches.  So two games in a row with a road PP goal…sounds like a hell of a streak to be on!

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 03/16/13 at 09:40 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

So two games in a row with a road PP goal

Holland signing that Petry fellow was a great move.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 03/16/13 at 09:45 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

so i guess ‘he who shall not be named’ is now off the trade list eh?

if he ever was on that list to begin with.

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/16/13 at 09:48 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

UFC Feed

Here’s an alternate feed if anybody needs one….

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 03/16/13 at 09:54 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

WTF. I’m watching NHLN first they had MNT v NJ; that game ended and I expected the Wings game. Now its toronton winipeg skills competition. FU Gary

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/16/13 at 10:02 PM ET

Hootinani's avatar

Well, lets try this shite again, wadya say, ladies and gents?

Posted by Hootinani on 03/16/13 at 10:04 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

This effin shootout won’ end

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/16/13 at 10:05 PM ET

Hootinani's avatar

Lupul didnt miss a beat, playin with Kadri suits him

Posted by Hootinani on 03/16/13 at 10:06 PM ET

calquake's avatar

I haven’t seen one player on either team try a deke until the last one.

Posted by calquake on 03/16/13 at 10:06 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

These guys suck! How were any goals scored in this game. They’re on round 8 of the SO

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/16/13 at 10:06 PM ET

calquake's avatar

mY wASN’T tHAT eEXCITING.

Posted by calquake on 03/16/13 at 10:08 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Round 10?

Finally

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 03/16/13 at 10:08 PM ET

Avatar

That looked more like an anti-skills competition.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 03/16/13 at 10:08 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Finally, round 10. Now cut to the Wings game….

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/16/13 at 10:08 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

how many round did that so go?

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/16/13 at 10:09 PM ET

calquake's avatar

how many round did that so go?

Too many.

Posted by calquake on 03/16/13 at 10:09 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Jets win, but a Leaf is the number one star? Toronto media has a lot of credibility I see

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/16/13 at 10:10 PM ET

Avatar

Anyone who claims shootouts are so exciting should be forced to watch rounds 4-9 of that mess over and over again.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 03/16/13 at 10:11 PM ET

calquake's avatar

The Wings have every reason to lose tonight so I fully expect the opposite.  Actually I just wanna see a good game.

Posted by calquake on 03/16/13 at 10:11 PM ET

Down River Dan's avatar

I’m listening to the Michigan/Western game, which Michigan leads 5-1 early in the third.  I think someone said this last night in the LB, but I’ll say it again.  If this year’s Michigan team can turn things around the way they have, the Wings sure as hell can too.


Much like the Wings and their streak, UM has a 22 year streak of making the NCAA playoffs. Red and the Boys will have to win the final CCHA tourney to keep that streak alive. Go Blue!

Posted by Down River Dan on 03/16/13 at 10:11 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Go Blue!

Posted by Down River Dan on 03/16/13 at 10:11 PM ET

What he said.

Posted by calquake on 03/16/13 at 10:12 PM ET

Bent's avatar

Evening bitches.

Those jerseys are fugly.

LGRW!

Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 03/16/13 at 10:12 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

pregame songs being sung

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/16/13 at 10:12 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Evening bitches.
Those jerseys are fugly.
LGRW!
Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 03/16/13 at 10:12 PM ET

Even though the current Cannucks have nothing to do with the Millionaires, I love the history behind it and love the jerseys. Of course that could be all the cocktails I’ve had talking

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/16/13 at 10:14 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

Present, deal me in.

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, for the 23rd postseason.... on 03/16/13 at 10:14 PM ET

Hootinani's avatar

And away we go

Posted by Hootinani on 03/16/13 at 10:15 PM ET

Bent's avatar

OMG really?

Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 03/16/13 at 10:15 PM ET

Hootinani's avatar

fuch me running

Posted by Hootinani on 03/16/13 at 10:16 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com