Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

You Want Obscurity?

Let’s not kid ourselves.  The signs are now pointing to Minnesota.  The Wild signed some kid whose friends with both Suter and Parise.  Suter’s agent shared a plane with the Wild brass on his way (or on his return) to Madison.  Brian Lawton guaranteed last night that Minnesota was the place for Suter, and all the chatter is starting to lean toward both going to one place. 

And if that place is Minnesota?

Well, it’s better than Chicago. Much better than Pittsburgh (unbelievably, a worse blue line than ours).  These two guys go to Minnesota and there is no clear-cut favorite. Not because everyone is equally good, but because each team has huge holes. 

Go to Minnesota, young men. Head there for the quiet and the solitude, the lack of glare. Go ahead.  But don’t ever forget you had your chances, boys. 

Today’s the day.  And I’m not optimistic, but who the hell knows? I could be running around naked with a sparkler in my mouth by 1700 IST (IWO Standard Time), celebrating with a warm PBR and a tattoo of Parise and Suter embraced in a figure-four leg lock, both wearing Red Wing diapers.

Comment as you see fit, but keep it juvenile please.

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Comments

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TeamDub's avatar

I’m currently enjoying a caffeine and Vicodin buzz (thanks, wonky back!) and frankly just don’t give a shiat anymore.

Just no pissburgh.

Happy Independence Day, Chief - thanks for what you do.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 07/04/12 at 12:50 PM ET

yzer19man's avatar

Minny would definitely be the lesser of the evils (Shittsburgh, Philly, Chicago). It would make them a playoff team, but barely.
At this point, just glad we can see the light at the end of the tunnel. Its been a long 3 days.

Posted by yzer19man from Chicago, IL on 07/04/12 at 12:52 PM ET

Avatar

So the total cost of Suter never winning a cup is about 100MM.

Posted by beelza on 07/04/12 at 12:55 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

I posted this in the last thread:

It appears the sweepstakes is down to DET and Minny.

Seriously, assuming the money is the same, can this really be a hard sell?

If Holland can’t seal this deal - - WTF?

Let’s see, DET is 0-6, rich tradition, money, and yes winning.

MIN - - not so much.

Tick-  fuching - Tock.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 07/04/12 at 09:50 AM ET

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 07/04/12 at 12:58 PM ET

OlderThanChelios's avatar

I could be running around naked with a sparkler in my mouth by 1700 IST…

I had a neighbor like that once. Worse two years of my life.

...celebrating with a warm PBR and a tattoo of Parise and Suter embraced in a figure-four leg lock, both wearing Red Wing diapers.

Yah, that’s gonna over real well with the wife and daughters. But we’ll still luv ya – and we thank you for your service (both here at A2Y and out on the sea).

Posted by OlderThanChelios from Grand Rapids, MI on 07/04/12 at 12:58 PM ET

Avatar

As I stated in another post….  It’s as much about preventing another team from signing them as signing them to your own team.

Posted by T Bird from Micigan/Indiana on 07/04/12 at 01:07 PM ET

dougie's avatar

If Holland can’t seal this deal - - WTF?

It only proves that he can’t deal with retards. Maybe he should have gone to Madison on a fire truck, instead of the corporate jet. Taken a littler of puppies, instead of Chelios.

Posted by dougie on 07/04/12 at 01:10 PM ET

Triple Deke Tyler's avatar

help

Posted by Triple Deke Tyler from Lansing on 07/04/12 at 01:11 PM ET

Cal's avatar

It is amazing that the local (MN) management could, with their obvious commitment to being-just-good-enough-to-sell-tickets, convince these two that their coming would turn this franchise into a Cup contender.

Ain’t buyin’ it.

Posted by Cal on 07/04/12 at 01:12 PM ET

Avatar

I can’t take another day of this thing, especially with the greatest game in Corinthians’ history tonite.

But agree with Okie, if we lose them to Minne-fuching-sota over anything other than dollars, the franchise’s status takes a huge bump.

Posted by Herm from the office, not working, on 07/04/12 at 01:13 PM ET

Avatar

Sorry Chief, this will grate on me for awhile.  A team with no tradition, no Cups, no legends beats out a team with 4 cups in the last 15 years and an Original 6 tradition who has not only never missed the playoffs in 2 decades, but a threat to win the Cup each time.  This is my punch in the gut.

Posted by Booyah! from Chicago on 07/04/12 at 01:14 PM ET

TeamDub's avatar

This is my punch in the gut.

It ain’t over yet.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 07/04/12 at 01:15 PM ET

Keyser S.'s avatar

If they both go to minnesota that’s fine. It’s hockey purgatory. They won’t succeed or fail, no one will care about them, they won’t win any awards, they’ll just exist as hockey players until they retire.

Posted by Keyser S. on 07/04/12 at 01:17 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

Sorry Chief, this will grate on me for awhile.

Oh…me too.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 07/04/12 at 01:18 PM ET

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The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree.

I think that, based on what I have read about father J.P. and his mentoring/interaction with Zach over the years, that this is a smart, solid family that does things for genuinely good long term reasons.

For that reason, I think it points towards Parise (and very likely Suter) wearing the hideous ‘wheat’, red, and green of the Wild.

Posted by charlie@HockeyBias.com from United States on 07/04/12 at 01:19 PM ET

TeamDub's avatar

they’ll just exist as hockey players until they retire.

Together.

In Vermont.

(NTTAWWT)

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 07/04/12 at 01:19 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

FUCH!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 07/04/12 at 01:35 PM ET

Avatar

If they go to Minnie, at least our division gets a little easier.  Even more so after Nash moves…

Posted by vfsvfl on 07/04/12 at 01:42 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Are you guys *#$%@& kidding?  If Zach Parise goes to Minnesota, Dany Heatley will score 70 goals next season.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 07/04/12 at 01:53 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Sweet Baby Jeebus… can we all just get our lives back now?

Posted by calquake on 07/04/12 at 01:58 PM ET

Gabriel's avatar

It ain’t over yet.

I see that Vicodin brings out the bitch in you.

Man, I want to punch every one of you guys in the face, just so we can see who starts crying.  Except Dub, cause he can’t feel shit right now. Look, this season’s gonna kick our pride in the nuts. The Colorado rivalry will start up again, this time in a fight for last place. People are going to gloat and it’s going to suck. The playoff streak might end.  The glory days may be over. The gods may be dead. So be it. 

Let’s go Red Wings.

Posted by Gabriel from San Diego, CA on 07/04/12 at 02:02 PM ET

TeamDub's avatar

I see that Vicodin brings out the bitch in you.

I’m hurt/honored.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 07/04/12 at 02:03 PM ET

TeamDub's avatar

Pittsburgh officially out on Parise (per Twitter…)

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 07/04/12 at 02:04 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

If Zach Parise goes to Minnesota, Dany Heatley will score 70 goals next season.

aww, you beat me too it.

I dont care what it would do to MN. They’d probably make the playoffs and do about as well as Nashville. Good for them. But I’m sure as hell concerned with our blueline if we dont land Suter. I have faith in Kronwall and in White when he’s being relied on to anchor a top pair. I’m even ok with E52 being something of a shutdown defender. But beyond that? A lot of question marks and “potential.” Kenny had best have another move up his sleeve on defense.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 07/04/12 at 02:07 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

bah…White when he’s NOT being relied on to anchor a top pair. Where’s my edit button?

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 07/04/12 at 02:08 PM ET

Avatar

Suter to the Wild!

Posted by charlie@HockeyBias.com from United States on 07/04/12 at 02:11 PM ET

TeamDub's avatar

Suter to Wild.

Barf.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 07/04/12 at 02:11 PM ET

TeamDub's avatar

...aaaaand Wings notified that they’re “out” on Parise as well.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 07/04/12 at 02:12 PM ET

Avatar

Minnesota now tanking on the Obscurity meter! smile

Posted by charlie@HockeyBias.com from United States on 07/04/12 at 02:15 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Kenny, get on your plane, along with a brinks truck and fly to Sweden.  You know what you have to do.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 07/04/12 at 02:20 PM ET

Cal's avatar

Jeepers, Wally.

We had better get after Hot Carle.  Pronto.

Posted by Cal on 07/04/12 at 02:22 PM ET

monkey's avatar

In all seriousness, I fail to see how landing both Suter and Parise, if it comes to that, doesn’t make Minnesota an instant contender.

The Los Angeles Kings are the Stanley Cup Champions, having entered the post season as an eighth seed.

This is Gary’s World, ladies and gentlemen.  There aren’t just a handful of perennial contenders, there are 30 mediocre teams.  That old line about “getting hot at the right time”, which was always bullshit before, is actually true now.

If you don’t believe the Wild can win it all you’re fooling yourself.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 07/04/12 at 02:23 PM ET

Avatar

13 years of PARISE in Minnesota!!!

Posted by charlie@HockeyBias.com from United States on 07/04/12 at 02:25 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

In all seriousness, I fail to see how landing both Suter and Parise, if it comes to that, doesn’t make Minnesota an instant contender.

The Los Angeles Kings are the Stanley Cup Champions, having entered the post season as an eighth seed.

This is Gary’s World, ladies and gentlemen.  There aren’t just a handful of perennial contenders, there are 30 mediocre teams.  That old line about “getting hot at the right time”, which was always bullshit before, is actually true now.

If you don’t believe the Wild can win it all you’re fooling yourself.

Posted by monkey from pushing Jimmy Howard on 07/04/12 at 12:23 PM ET

I have to agree with this.  Minnie wasn’t horrible last year, just a bit anemic on the offensive side.  And they’ve just given themselves a pretty nice shot.

At least we got Tootoo.

This makes standing pat at the deadline seem even worse than before.  I never believed that the Wings would get Parise, but I honestly thought Suter was heading to the D.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 07/04/12 at 02:27 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Terms?

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 07/04/12 at 02:28 PM ET

cementslinger's avatar

Posted by monkey from pushing Jimmy Howard on 07/04/12 at 12:23 PM ET

Dude, we’re just masking our pain. Let us have our moment.

Posted by cementslinger from Midland MI on 07/04/12 at 02:28 PM ET

Cal's avatar

Suter joins such defensive stalwarts as Clayton Stoner, Jared Spurgeon, Nate Prosser, Marco Scandella, and Tome Gilbert.

Sounds formidable.

Posted by Cal on 07/04/12 at 02:32 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

What a bunch to the balls.

Tick - *#$%@& - Tock

Summer of Ken II isn’t looking too damn spiffy, as a matter of fact, so far it has been an epic FUBAR.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 07/04/12 at 02:32 PM ET

Avatar

Cal, Wild have good goalies and everybody on the team just got their game elevated; it is human nature. Also, until they were decimated by injuries they were a very competitive team last year. I am more of a Gopher fan than a Wild fan, but this is brand new team as of a few minutes ago. Don’t forget Granlund arrives in camp this year too…

Posted by charlie@HockeyBias.com from United States on 07/04/12 at 02:35 PM ET

Gabriel's avatar

You know what? Good. What I saw in the playoffs was too many players who’s hearts just weren’t in it. They need an ass kicking, and they’re going to get it in front of the country on New Year’s Day.

This team needs to be embarassed. They need to be as sad and as hungry as Keith Tkachuk during the preseason.  Otherwise, we could have added Suter and Parise and it wouldn’t have made a damn bit of difference. Just ask Marian Hossa.

Posted by Gabriel from San Diego, CA on 07/04/12 at 02:40 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com