Abel to Yzerman
Defending the republic can be hard work. Hard, stressful work that I sometimes interrupt to entertain you bastards with my prose and seemingly endless wealth of hockey knowledge. Consequently, I tend to find amusement in things that other people don’t, well, get. Oh, I’m not talking about the simple stuff like Transvestite Dive Fans or Dive Fans Who Rip The Heads off Defenseless Duckies. Don’t get me wrong…those situations do make me laugh.
But I’m going to give you some insight you haven’t had before. And this is some sophisticated, high-brow stuff. If you’re drunk, you may want to stop reading now because this may just fly right over your heads. Today, on the phone, taking down an email address:
Me: “What’s your address?”
Caller: “somethingsomething at cox dot net.”
Me: “Ok…is that C-O-X”?
That made me laugh for frigging hours.
I can only find one reference to it, and it’s far from definitive.
Tonight could have marked the return of former Wing Brendan Shanahan to Joe Louis Arena, but no such drama.
Shanahan was in the lineup Monday when the Rangers played the New York Islanders in Long Island.
Like many NHL teams, the Rangers prefer not to play veterans on consecutive nights in the exhibition season.
Just come out and say it Ted. Shanahan’s not playing. He doesn’t say so because he doesn’t know, and he doesn’t know because he didn’t ask. Ted Kulfan assumes Brendan Shanahan’s not playing, and that assumption is probably correct. But I guarantee he didn’t make the phone call to find out, because if he had he would have written this: Brendan Shanahan won’t be in the lineup for the Rangers tonight.
I had this season preview nearly finished about thirty minutes ago, then I started thinking about that Dive fan ripping that duck’s head off. Did it bother some of us? Of course it did. No one wants to see a ducky treated like that in public, even though it happens half a million times each day by allegedly sober people in whatever places they breed ducks so that Dive fans can eat said duck with their cold white wine between periods.
I can’t recall a time when the Wings didn’t make the playoffs, so it’s kind of hard for me to comprehend what I read today—courtesy of A2Y reader W2J2. Apparently, the lone Dive fan remaining in Denver has gone off the frigging deep end. So distraught by his garbage team’s inability to reach the postseason, he’s gone after the Cup winners in true bitter Dive fan fashion.
A Denver man who witnesses say ripped the head off a tame duck that lived in a pond in a hotel lobby is under arrest in St. Paul.
A police officer said that Scott Clark, a guest at the Embassy Suites hotel, cornered the duck early Saturday, ripped its head off and turned to onlookers and said: “I’m hungry. I’m gonna eat it.”
“He was allegedly drunk,” St. Paul police Sgt. John Wuorinen said.
Ted Kulfan believes it and, therefore, so should you. According to the former Digger Captain, Jiri Hudler’s earned himself a job.
He’ll open the season on a line with Henrik Zetterberg and Mikael Samuelsson, a line suited for Hudler’s offensive skills.
The Wings are curious what Hudler could do with more ice time.
“He’s got to shoot the puck,” coach Mike Babcock said. “He’s got to show that he can play in the top six.”
Seems like a good day to visit other hockey blogs, steal their best stuff and grudgingly attribute it to them rather than take credit for it myself. First, Center Ice Online has fifteen days to get it together before a few of us have to decide whether to drop the equivalent of fifteen twelve-packs of Rolling Rock on their product. After last night, it’s hard to justify it. Several crashes, intermittent audio, frozen pictures and a couple tantrums. For the second time in as many attempts, I stopped trying mid-way through the second. I’d rather not watch than deal with the frustration. If the glitches aren’t straightened out by 9 October (when the free preview is supposed to end), I’d suggest they extend it until they’re sure what they’re offering is worth the investment.
Just saw an ad for some sort of cheesy melt thing now offered at a big-named Mexican food franchise. The slow-mo imagery of cheddar cheese inspired me to post instead of continue to flip between MSU/Domers and UM/Penn State.
Larry Wigge’s written a nifty little diddy on Dallas Drake and mentions the Wing draft class of ‘89: an amazing effort. Lidstrom, Konstantinov, Fedorov, Bob Boughner, Mike Sillinger and Drake. Think about that: if not for Konstantinov’s misfortune in June of 2007, you’d probably be looking at three hall of famers drafted by one team in one year.
Plenty of good quotes in Wigge’s story from former teammates and opponents. Makes me wish we’d picked him up three years ago when I started whining about it.
”Players often ask you if you caught the license plate on that truck after you get plastered into the boards,” Foote said. “When you play against Dallas Drake, you have that license plate memorized. You expect to be pounded by him. Not a more fierce and honest competitor in the game.’‘
This guy’s going to win some fans in Detroit..quickly.
Thought I’d log on to the NHL Video Portal, just for fun. Watched the highlights of the San Jose series, which made me warm. Then clicked on “Center Ice” to see if the Wings game was going to be offered tonight. Ran into some problems in that a registration screen popped up. Filled it out, even though I’d done that previously. Then I got the option of the early bird special for $149 or the free preview. Selected free preview and got some sort of error code 500, which prevented me from going any further.
Called the customer service and actually spoke with someone who said “eh” and had a decidedly Canadian accent. The guy told me that they’re having “issues” with the interface right now and that if the problem isn’t solved soon they’re going to do a work-around to make sure all the games scheduled for tonight (including the Wings) will be available.
I didn’t see a single thing that impressed me. Through 61 minutes I didn’t see one hit, one shot, one save or one shift that made me sit up and take notice. My memory of the game is blank and that’s only natural because I didn’t watch the frigging thing. I do have impressions though, and I’d like to share them with you so that we can—as a community—discuss them at length. We established that norm when we started this blog in 1977 and I’d like to kind of keep it going this morning.
Gotta give your boy George Malik credit. When Wing news hits those pulsing Russian news wires, he’s on it like….(insert Bubba line here. I’ve exhausted all mine.)
Today? Igor Grigorenko tells some Russian writer for some Russian paper that he’s done with the mother country come Detroit or Grand Rapids.
About Abel to Yzerman
Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977. No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y. Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation. There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature. Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: email@example.com