Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Yes…Live Blog It. But Don’t Watch This Game.  It Will Be Too Painful.

I don't know how we can do it.  Scientifically, it's probably impossible.  But one way or another? We need to Live Blog this game without...actually...watching...it.

You guys take days like this way too seriously.  Losses affect you in obscene ways, and usually the consequences are hygienic in nature.  And that's not good.  Today will be horrible.  Chicago is too good. They haven't lost in Detroit in 8 games.  They lead the league in scoring, defense, minor in possession offenses and specialty play.  They're going to win the Cup, the Jennings, the Clemente award.

The Wings have no chance.  

So you can't watch it.  Don't even listen to it. Just comment when you feel a tingle.  Or don't comment at all.  Read something.  Write your congressman a ditty and tell him the Navy actually, you know, belongs at sea and it might be a good idea to, you know, get his fat ass back to Washington and send us there...to sea, that is. That's a sequestration reference, by the way.

But don't watch this shit show.  And a shit show it will be. Detroyet doesn't  have the firepower. Our young defense is just not stout enough. Our coach is overrated and their coach is a savant.

They have Hossa. We have Franzen.  Repeat that to yourself five times and then end it all.

The mountain is too steep.  The only thing the Wings possibly have going for them...

...is the fact that they simply win games like this.  They do and you know it.  You've been looking forward to this with calm confidence when all the smart kids say we should dread it.

You don't dread it.  Because you know.

Wings win. In regulation.  By two goals.

Forget what I said about not watching this. That was stupid. Watch this one.  It's a Live Blog bitches.

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Comments

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monkey's avatar

HOT DAMN I FEEL ALIVE

Posted by monkey from Finland on 03/03/13 at 12:49 PM ET

MoreShoot's avatar

 Repeat that to yourself five times and then end it all

... or, alternately, inhale deeply, exhale, relight spliff, repeat.

Posted by MoreShoot on 03/03/13 at 12:52 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Bonjour, Master Chief!

I believe.

LET’S GO RED WINGS !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 03/03/13 at 12:55 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

They have Hossa. We have Franzen.
They have Hossa. We have Franzen.
They have Hossa. We have Franzen.
They have Hossa. We have Franzen.
They have Hossa. We have Franzen.

........................

Posted by pgoody on 03/03/13 at 12:59 PM ET

NIVO's avatar

Hail to the chief! I’d like to mention a note of worthiness. I’m going to watch this fight. Carcillo vs. Tootoo. If a hockey games becomes of it, so be it.

Game On!

Posted by NIVO from underpants gnome village on 03/03/13 at 01:00 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

at the time I really thought franzen was the better choice. now? not so much. prove me wrong franzen.

on another thought, Pav has 26 two goal games in his time with the wings 0 hat tricks.

today is a good day to end that.

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/03/13 at 01:04 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

ahhhh

thanks, Chief.

let’s climb this mountain, earn us 2 points

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/03/13 at 01:05 PM ET

calquake's avatar

That’s a sequestration reference, by the way.

Doesn’t that have something to do with horses and Mitt Romney?

Posted by calquake on 03/03/13 at 01:08 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

So the tables have turned…little brother has grown up and can beat up big brother….. that doesnt mean big bro cant still kick juniors ass.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 03/03/13 at 01:15 PM ET

monkey's avatar

They have Hossa. We have Franzen.  Repeat that to yourself five times and then end it all.

Are you claiming that Johan Franzen plays hockey for the Detroit Red Wings?

Posted by monkey from Finland on 03/03/13 at 01:17 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

let’s not forget which of gary’s (Thanks.Ass) may be “officiating” the game ...

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/03/13 at 01:18 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

I’ll be late to the LB, but listening to the game.  Not that it needs saying, but carry on.

Hossa - Franzen.  EGAD.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 03/03/13 at 01:23 PM ET

Avatar

At bar here in northern suburbs of Chicago where I live watching with a couple friend’s who are Hawk fans of course. This can’t go well

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 03/03/13 at 01:24 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Write your congressman a ditty and tell him the Navy actually, you know, belongs at sea and it might be a good idea to, you know, get his fat ass back to Washington

Whatever it takes. Thank you, Master Chief, for putting it on the line. Every. Single. Day.

With great respect,
Kate

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/03/13 at 01:25 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

GAME FEED

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/03/13 at 01:27 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Ahoy, Sailor.  Raising a Bailey’s and coffee to you and your fellow warriors.

let’s not forget which of gary’s (Thanks.Ass) may be “officiating” the game ...

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/03/13 at 12:18 PM ET

Linesman:  Well, I’m sure I can Gary in there somewhere.
Toews:  ...
Ref:  [sniff]
Toews:  ...

Posted by SYF from Zata's Epic Viking Beard on 03/03/13 at 01:29 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Doc:  “Most regular season wins last year: Detroit.  Most regular season wins this year: Chicago.” 

A third of the way through half a season.

Barf.

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 03/03/13 at 01:32 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

P.S.  I assume he meant “in a row.”

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 03/03/13 at 01:33 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 03/03/13 at 01:33 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

pregame song being sung.

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/03/13 at 01:35 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Wait.  The Wings had the longest winning streak at home last year.  Now I don’t know what the hell Doc said - or meant.

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 03/03/13 at 01:36 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Catch y’all on the flipside, 19.

Get your shit done right, Wings.

Posted by SYF from Zata's Epic Viking Beard on 03/03/13 at 01:36 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

LET’S GO RED WINGS (Clap, clap, clap, clap, clap) !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 03/03/13 at 01:37 PM ET

klank's avatar

60 minutes, boys.  Ground da Hawks!

Posted by klank from the finest hot tub in Marin on 03/03/13 at 01:37 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

ewwwwwwwwwwwww

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/03/13 at 01:38 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Wait.  The Wings had the longest winning streak at home last year.  Now I don’t know what the hell Doc said - or meant.

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 03/03/13 at 12:36 PM ET

Why should you be any different than anyone else? cheese

Posted by calquake on 03/03/13 at 01:38 PM ET

MoreShoot's avatar

Today’s libation is Alpha King!  Bring it on

Posted by MoreShoot on 03/03/13 at 01:38 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

Aloha bitches

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 03/03/13 at 01:39 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

8-13-11 combo makes me sad.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 03/03/13 at 01:39 PM ET

dougie's avatar

We won the first minute

Posted by dougie on 03/03/13 at 01:40 PM ET

shanetx's avatar

Oduya grabbed Brunner’s stick behind the net.  No call.  Of course.

Posted by shanetx from Floydada, Texas on 03/03/13 at 01:40 PM ET

klank's avatar

love the edginess Brunner is playing with on the fore check.  in SJ he pushed/thumped Thornton out of the zone to cause an off sides.

Posted by klank from the finest hot tub in Marin on 03/03/13 at 01:40 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Aloha bitches

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 03/03/13 at 12:39 PM ET

Afternoon chief!

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 03/03/13 at 01:41 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Brunner over Parise - winner

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/03/13 at 01:41 PM ET

klank's avatar

shoot the puck, Abby.

Posted by klank from the finest hot tub in Marin on 03/03/13 at 01:43 PM ET

shanetx's avatar

Eeeeee.

Posted by shanetx from Floydada, Texas on 03/03/13 at 01:43 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

Whew… just just a stick on Toews before he was gonna bury it

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 03/03/13 at 01:43 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Afternoon chief!

um, ...

Good Morning, too.  grin

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/03/13 at 01:43 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

That’s a sequestration reference, by the way.
Doesn’t that have something to do with horses and Mitt Romney?
Posted by calquake on 03/03/13 at 12:08 PM ET

Didn’t he tie the horse to the top of his Rambler wagon, tie Tagg to the top of the horse, and drive to Canada on a road trip?

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/03/13 at 01:43 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

Horse.  Shit.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 03/03/13 at 01:44 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com