Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Two Bones Left To Be Chewed And Then All Bets Are Off

The interns were excited yesterday.  Little tykes. Children really.  On loan from institutions like Grand Valley State, Saginaw Valley, Northern Michigan and Ferris (oddly, the only schools willing to take a chance in 1987 on a young Irishman fresh off a straight C career at Saginaw’s Arthur Hill High School). They knew the import of last night’s game, how critical it was to the psyche of the 19…a fragile thing during the best of times.  The interns met early, shook off their wine cooler hangovers and refined their pitch.  By 2pm they were unified and rosy cheeked, gathered in the A2Y outer office, waiting for their moment to convince the Chief that the time had come to discard the doubts.

One by one I chastised them.  It wasn’t the time for optimism. Happiness had no place in our hearts yesterday.  Beating the ferocious Blues in St. Louis was too tall an order and one that shouldn’t be entertained by the likes of level-headed us.  But they wore me down and by 6pm the live blog had posted and we’d danced on the limb.  Mule would be the Moose.  James Tiberius MF’ing Howard would return to form. Our swirling saucer of magic would lead us and even a tall boy named Jonny would remind us of the hope we had for him back in 2009, or was it ‘08?  Somehow, the interns saw all this and they promised me that if I’d just show a few phrases of faith, I’d be rewarded.

So the LB went up and the Stress Train left the station for what we hope will be a long Spring journey into a Southern Michigan Summer.  Predictions were published and that’s always a hinky proposition.  We said that game 80 was precisely the kind of game the Wings would win because they’re, well, the Wings.  We predicted a victory because the Blues are, well, bitches. 

When the Wings gave up the inevitable shorty I fired every intern in the building. I told them to pack their miserable sacks of shit and banished them from A2Y headquarters.  Two minutes later I posted every one of their resumes on St. Louis Game Time, declaring them fit for duty on that piss pot of a blog.

But then Moose became Mule again.  Twice.  The Wings tied it up and I brought the interns back in and gave them milk.  We went to OT and baby Jesus told us we’d have our 12th (yes…12th) consecutive 100 point season.  And then a Killer on the Road took a slow ditty to the crease and delivered a backhanded bitch slap to Blues fans everywhere and that was good.

And now, like Gordo told us, there are bones left to be chewed. Two of them.  Just two and then the torture starts.  Stay healthy. That’s all we can hope for. We can’t expect a dramatically improved power play because that’s just not going to happen.  We can hope the offense picks up, that Franzen will somehow stay hot (and holy Hell he looked good in the third).

The interns are less optimistic today, of course. They tell me that after last night, tonite is exactly the kind of games the Wings lose.  We know that’s just raw logic. 

It’s a trap game of a Live Blog, bitches.  Your emotions are now allowed to get the best, or worst, of you.  Start now.  Work your way into it, because in less than a week we’re all going to be worthless.

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Comments

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Trish's avatar

Apparently, we were a little early on the switch thingy . . .

Posted by Trish from Tampa/Clearwater FL on 04/05/12 at 10:55 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Nice avatar, Dub… that’s how I feel right now.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 04/05/12 at 10:55 PM ET

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snapped 9 game loosing streak, my foot….
That’s what we do to poor teams. We make them feel good.

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 10:55 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

This effort won’t cut it next week.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/05/12 at 10:58 PM ET

Joe Z.'s avatar

thank god pheonix can’t catch the wings.

Posted by Joe Z. from Austria on 04/05/12 at 10:59 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Proof once again that twenty decent minutes of hockey per night just isn’t good enough in this league.  So much for momentum.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 04/05/12 at 10:59 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

hard to keep intensity back-to-back

legs didn’t last

jimmy looked good ... and i miss helm

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 11:00 PM ET

Avatar

LETS GO DAAAAAL-LAS!

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 11:01 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

NSH 1 DAL 0 @ 15:32 of the 3rd

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 11:05 PM ET

cigar_nurse's avatar

Well that sucked.Jersey playing like it’s 1995 with all their clutching and grabbing. I swear Lamorello has pictures of Gary in a compromised position the way that team gets away with shite.
I was at that game the devils won in 96. I remember the Wings on the short end of a lot of penalities and the fans holding up the game several times throwing tons of crap on the ice.
Have a good night 19.

Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 04/05/12 at 11:05 PM ET

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Dallas team looks discombuboobulated very much like RW… down 0-1

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 11:06 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

CHI 2 Minn 0 ... under review

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 11:12 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

It’s possible we could be watching the last game of the season 10:30 pm Saturday to see who will be hosting us in the first round, LAK at SJS.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/05/12 at 11:13 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

no goal

CHI still 1 Minn 0 at 9:06 of the 3rd

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 11:14 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

It’s possible we could be watching the last game of the season 10:30 pm Saturday to see who will be hosting us in the first round, LAK at SJS.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/05/12 at 11:15 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

dallas on the PP at 9:30 to go in the 3rd, down 0-1

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 11:16 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

preds go on the PP with 6:48 to go ...

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 11:19 PM ET

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It’s possible we could be watching the last game of the season 10:30 pm Saturday to see who will be hosting us in the first round, LAK at SJS.

Saturday? At 10:30 pm?
Not many of 19 would be able to watch this. Me included.

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 11:20 PM ET

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Hate to say this, but Preds are shooting da puck

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 11:22 PM ET

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Dallas play like they have their tee time reserved already.
The second year in a row they throw playoffs away in the last or second to last game. Poor Dallas fans
Yep, down 0-2 while I was typing.
And RW are in the 5th again

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 11:27 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Minn ties it at 3:12 of the 3rd with ‘lil bro

... and NSH scores, 2-0, with less than 2 to go in the game with dal

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 11:27 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Omg dallas just left a rebound square in front of their net that Preds slammed home 2-0, put Preds in 4th and ends Dallas’ season.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/05/12 at 11:28 PM ET

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Detroit-NJ game score is flashed on the scoreboard in Nashville with 1:29 to go. The house goes crazy

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 11:30 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

nash in 4th ... dllas set tee times

OT in Minn

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 11:33 PM ET

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And ENetter to boot. This Pred team has mojo going for them.
When was the last time RW scored an EN goal. Was it in 2011?

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 11:34 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

The Dallas announcer, “For the fourth straight year, no playoffs for the Dallas Stars.”

That must suck.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/05/12 at 11:35 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

skills comp now in Minn

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 11:39 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Minn wins in the SO over ‘lil bro

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 11:48 PM ET

Avatar

Minn over Chi in a gimmick that looked as wacky and bad as an All-Star-Game shootout.

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 11:52 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

So Chicago can tie Detroit with a win in regulation time, and each would have 39 ROW.  the next tie breaker is head to head, what does that look like?  5th and 6th place could be determined by Det-Chi head to head for the season, I don’t know how that stands, but if Chi won in regulation Sat they would probably win the series and 5th place.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/05/12 at 11:53 PM ET

RWBill's avatar


Minn over Chi in a gimmick that looked as wacky and bad as an All-Star-Game shootout.

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 10:52 PM ET

That WAS bad, wasn’t it?  Chicago didn’t even get off shots sometimes.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/05/12 at 11:55 PM ET

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Delvin Louganis Setoguchi with a lonely SO goal. He was the only shooter who actually shot da puck in da net. The rest of the shooters were just on funny shrooms.

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 11:56 PM ET

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the next tie breaker is head to head

Chi have an upper hand in this over RW

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 11:57 PM ET

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Chicago didn’t even get off shots sometimes.

Yep, but wait ... what? They don’t want to grab the coveted 5th place?

Posted by Alex on 04/06/12 at 12:01 AM ET

RWBill's avatar

Haha yeah. 

Chi has 3-0-2 record vs Wings, so if they win in regulation they tie Detroit in points and ROW, and win the tiebreaker for best head to head, Detroit to sixth.  Third still has too many variables although LA leading SJ by 1 goal early, can block Sharks from Division first with a win tonight.

Oops, game tied 1-1.

‘course Detroit can still get 4th but need Min to beat NSV Sat.

If Gary.Ass wanted to prop up fan interest to the very end with global mediocrity he is succeeding.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/06/12 at 12:17 AM ET

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And it looks very much like finishing 5th or 6th will be decided in the very last RW game - Sat Apr 7, 2012 CHI at DET.

Posted by Alex on 03/22/12 at 12:35 PM ET

And that game might be fun to watch, given the Chi antics in today’s SO and their apparent lack of interest in inching closer to the 5th.

Posted by Alex on 04/06/12 at 12:28 AM ET

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If Gary.Ass wanted to prop up fan interest to the very end with global mediocrity he is succeeding.

This. I never thought I would see a communist idea of Soviet-era “parity” as a business model in the USA, but NHL proves otherwise.

“Miraculous you call it, baby?
You ain’t seen nothing yet”

Posted by Alex on 04/06/12 at 12:36 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Damn.  I catch the rest of the LB and we lose.

And to daddy uncle fatso of all keepers.

Wranglers sweep the Grizzlies and advance to the second round.  A real hopeful hockey day turned into a half a cup full of hockey day.  And then the mighty Emperor posted Uncle Mike’s comments about the third and fourth lines.  Is he watching the same game we are?

Shitcago on Saturday afternoon.  I.Want.That.Game.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 04/06/12 at 02:20 AM ET

RWBill's avatar

a communist idea of Soviet-era “parity”
Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 11:36 PM ET

I have used almost the exact same language over the past 5 years.

Absolutely wild chaotic game in LA with Sharks.  LA took apart San Jose on a 5x3 in just 15 seconds.  I’m jealous.

Now on OT.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/06/12 at 02:21 AM ET

SYF's avatar

I’m watching that game, too, Bill.

And LAK gets called for holding.

Posted by SYF from Alana Blanchard's Bikinis and Surfboards on 04/06/12 at 02:24 AM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com