Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Two Bones Left To Be Chewed And Then All Bets Are Off

The interns were excited yesterday.  Little tykes. Children really.  On loan from institutions like Grand Valley State, Saginaw Valley, Northern Michigan and Ferris (oddly, the only schools willing to take a chance in 1987 on a young Irishman fresh off a straight C career at Saginaw’s Arthur Hill High School). They knew the import of last night’s game, how critical it was to the psyche of the 19…a fragile thing during the best of times.  The interns met early, shook off their wine cooler hangovers and refined their pitch.  By 2pm they were unified and rosy cheeked, gathered in the A2Y outer office, waiting for their moment to convince the Chief that the time had come to discard the doubts.

One by one I chastised them.  It wasn’t the time for optimism. Happiness had no place in our hearts yesterday.  Beating the ferocious Blues in St. Louis was too tall an order and one that shouldn’t be entertained by the likes of level-headed us.  But they wore me down and by 6pm the live blog had posted and we’d danced on the limb.  Mule would be the Moose.  James Tiberius MF’ing Howard would return to form. Our swirling saucer of magic would lead us and even a tall boy named Jonny would remind us of the hope we had for him back in 2009, or was it ‘08?  Somehow, the interns saw all this and they promised me that if I’d just show a few phrases of faith, I’d be rewarded.

So the LB went up and the Stress Train left the station for what we hope will be a long Spring journey into a Southern Michigan Summer.  Predictions were published and that’s always a hinky proposition.  We said that game 80 was precisely the kind of game the Wings would win because they’re, well, the Wings.  We predicted a victory because the Blues are, well, bitches. 

When the Wings gave up the inevitable shorty I fired every intern in the building. I told them to pack their miserable sacks of shit and banished them from A2Y headquarters.  Two minutes later I posted every one of their resumes on St. Louis Game Time, declaring them fit for duty on that piss pot of a blog.

But then Moose became Mule again.  Twice.  The Wings tied it up and I brought the interns back in and gave them milk.  We went to OT and baby Jesus told us we’d have our 12th (yes…12th) consecutive 100 point season.  And then a Killer on the Road took a slow ditty to the crease and delivered a backhanded bitch slap to Blues fans everywhere and that was good.

And now, like Gordo told us, there are bones left to be chewed. Two of them.  Just two and then the torture starts.  Stay healthy. That’s all we can hope for. We can’t expect a dramatically improved power play because that’s just not going to happen.  We can hope the offense picks up, that Franzen will somehow stay hot (and holy Hell he looked good in the third).

The interns are less optimistic today, of course. They tell me that after last night, tonite is exactly the kind of games the Wings lose.  We know that’s just raw logic. 

It’s a trap game of a Live Blog, bitches.  Your emotions are now allowed to get the best, or worst, of you.  Start now.  Work your way into it, because in less than a week we’re all going to be worthless.

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Comments

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Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Ready bitches?

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/05/12 at 10:26 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Honestly, I don’t get the appeal of Prince Fielder and I never understood why the Tigers went after him in the off-season.  Maybe the Tigers needed more power from the left side of the plate.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/05/12 at 10:27 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Second period.  Let’s shoot it, boys.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/05/12 at 10:29 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Hi, Alex from SF.
I’m Alex from NY.

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 08:25 PM ET

That is soooo bi-coastal.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 04/05/12 at 10:30 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Uncle Mike starting the third line this second period.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/05/12 at 10:30 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

3 scoring chances, tHAT wiLL wiN a loT oF gamES, especially vs Fatso.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/05/12 at 10:30 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

That is soooo bi-coastal.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 04/05/12 at 08:30 PM ET

WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE THE LIFESTYLE CHOI…

... oh wait.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 04/05/12 at 10:31 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

heheh

3-1 for NJ and no SOG

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/05/12 at 10:31 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Hi, Alex from SF.
I’m Alex from NY.

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 08:25 PM ET

Are you guys bi… coastal?

Posted by calquake on 04/05/12 at 10:31 PM ET

Avatar

Intermission Entertainment

Good evening, this is Larry King Live!

www(dot)volpin(dot)it/photogallery/animal/larry-king-live.jpg

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 10:32 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Aaand Parise gets knocked down and the first place he goes?

The net.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/05/12 at 10:32 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

nICE oUTLET pASS, bERT

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 04/05/12 at 10:32 PM ET

monkey's avatar

i missed that last night e52 played more minutes any any other wing. that can’t be right is it?

By “right” I assume you mean correct, as opposed to right vs. wrong.  If you mean the latter we might have to consult the morel authority.

If loving you is wrong, I don’t want to be right.  The one on the right’s on the left.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/05/12 at 10:32 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Good evening, this is Larry King Live!

Almost an oxymoron.

Posted by calquake on 04/05/12 at 10:33 PM ET

monkey's avatar

sounds like it is from inside of a whiskey barrel

What does it taste like?

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/05/12 at 10:33 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Nike - - facepalm

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/05/12 at 10:34 PM ET

Avatar

Are you guys bi… coastal?

I’m glad you asked…
Or bi… polar?

Oh, no!

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 10:34 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Goosedammit

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 04/05/12 at 10:34 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Totally legal to grab the net from behind and push the net off it’s moorings.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 04/05/12 at 10:35 PM ET

SYF's avatar

That’s three times for Abber to finish his rushes to the net.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/05/12 at 10:35 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

Quincey is the best at taking three hours to leave the back of the net and passing to the other team.

Screw you.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/05/12 at 10:35 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Should be delay of game but no cigar.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/05/12 at 10:35 PM ET

Avatar

Let the zebra suckage continue…..ridiculous that wasn’t delay of game.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 04/05/12 at 10:35 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

I used to get juiced up for a PP chance.

Those days are long gone

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/05/12 at 10:36 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Jackson actually calling a penalty that’s NOT against Homer?

No shit.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/05/12 at 10:36 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Holy crap was Holmstrom being held badly on that face off. Unreal, so blatant.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/05/12 at 10:36 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

oH gOODIE, a mAN aDVANTAGE

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 04/05/12 at 10:36 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Aaaaaaaaaaaahahahahahahahaaaa…!

Offsides on a PP.  Get your shit together, Wings.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/05/12 at 10:37 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Not a lot of people know this about Uncle Mike.  He also listens to Leonard Cohen records late at night, often in the throes of an opium stupor.

Everybody knows.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/05/12 at 10:37 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Let the zebra suckage continue…..ridiculous that wasn’t delay of game.

Posted by Valek on 04/05/12 at 08:35 PM ET

Of course it wasn’t… the Wings weren’t the perps.

Posted by calquake on 04/05/12 at 10:37 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

I hate these damn momentum killing penalties.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 04/05/12 at 10:37 PM ET

Joe Z.'s avatar

one shot, please, all im asking

Posted by Joe Z. from Austria on 04/05/12 at 10:37 PM ET

SYF's avatar

one shot, please, all im asking

Posted by Joe Z. from Austria on 04/05/12 at 08:37 PM ET

Gawd, you’re sooo demanding!

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/05/12 at 10:38 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Mick just say they on the power play. Then, point some fingers at the coaches.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/05/12 at 10:38 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

so detroit is on the Pucker Play, eh?

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 10:38 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

What a goal!

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 04/05/12 at 10:39 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

A PP GOAL

Pinch me

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/05/12 at 10:39 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

De fuching luxe!!

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 04/05/12 at 10:39 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Wow.  What a play.

Tied at 1.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/05/12 at 10:39 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

happy happy; joy joy!

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 04/05/12 at 10:39 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com