Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Two Bones Left To Be Chewed And Then All Bets Are Off

The interns were excited yesterday.  Little tykes. Children really.  On loan from institutions like Grand Valley State, Saginaw Valley, Northern Michigan and Ferris (oddly, the only schools willing to take a chance in 1987 on a young Irishman fresh off a straight C career at Saginaw’s Arthur Hill High School). They knew the import of last night’s game, how critical it was to the psyche of the 19…a fragile thing during the best of times.  The interns met early, shook off their wine cooler hangovers and refined their pitch.  By 2pm they were unified and rosy cheeked, gathered in the A2Y outer office, waiting for their moment to convince the Chief that the time had come to discard the doubts.

One by one I chastised them.  It wasn’t the time for optimism. Happiness had no place in our hearts yesterday.  Beating the ferocious Blues in St. Louis was too tall an order and one that shouldn’t be entertained by the likes of level-headed us.  But they wore me down and by 6pm the live blog had posted and we’d danced on the limb.  Mule would be the Moose.  James Tiberius MF’ing Howard would return to form. Our swirling saucer of magic would lead us and even a tall boy named Jonny would remind us of the hope we had for him back in 2009, or was it ‘08?  Somehow, the interns saw all this and they promised me that if I’d just show a few phrases of faith, I’d be rewarded.

So the LB went up and the Stress Train left the station for what we hope will be a long Spring journey into a Southern Michigan Summer.  Predictions were published and that’s always a hinky proposition.  We said that game 80 was precisely the kind of game the Wings would win because they’re, well, the Wings.  We predicted a victory because the Blues are, well, bitches. 

When the Wings gave up the inevitable shorty I fired every intern in the building. I told them to pack their miserable sacks of shit and banished them from A2Y headquarters.  Two minutes later I posted every one of their resumes on St. Louis Game Time, declaring them fit for duty on that piss pot of a blog.

But then Moose became Mule again.  Twice.  The Wings tied it up and I brought the interns back in and gave them milk.  We went to OT and baby Jesus told us we’d have our 12th (yes…12th) consecutive 100 point season.  And then a Killer on the Road took a slow ditty to the crease and delivered a backhanded bitch slap to Blues fans everywhere and that was good.

And now, like Gordo told us, there are bones left to be chewed. Two of them.  Just two and then the torture starts.  Stay healthy. That’s all we can hope for. We can’t expect a dramatically improved power play because that’s just not going to happen.  We can hope the offense picks up, that Franzen will somehow stay hot (and holy Hell he looked good in the third).

The interns are less optimistic today, of course. They tell me that after last night, tonite is exactly the kind of games the Wings lose.  We know that’s just raw logic. 

It’s a trap game of a Live Blog, bitches.  Your emotions are now allowed to get the best, or worst, of you.  Start now.  Work your way into it, because in less than a week we’re all going to be worthless.

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Comments

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stonehands-78's avatar

I’m with you, Master Chief.

The Stress Train.

get another “W” tonight, boys.

L.G.R.W.  ...  12 in ‘12

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 04/05/12 at 07:06 PM ET

mrfluffy's avatar

Toga. Toga. Toga. Toga!

Posted by mrfluffy from A wide spot on I-90 in Montana on 04/05/12 at 07:13 PM ET

Avatar

You’ve gotta tip a hat to the man.
Speaking of the second Franzen’s goal Hitchcock said “I’m disappointed more in myself. I don’t make that mistake that late in the game very often, but I made the mistake. So I’m more disappointed in myself than I am in anything. ...For the most part, it was my fault. The second goal, I had the wrong people on the ice. We got caught on a line change and it ended up in our net ... my fault.”
You almost expect the RW coaching staff to step forward and say something similar about their woeful PP.

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 07:15 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Q:Since 1994, and excluding 1995,

What the hell kind of start to a question is that?

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/05/12 at 07:17 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Predictions were published and that’s always a hinky proposition.

hinky is sorely underutilized.

Arthur Hill? At least it wasn’t Saginaw Douglas MacArthur, a repulsive group of snobby preppie bitches.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/05/12 at 07:21 PM ET

edillac's avatar

so,is Fatso getting an retirement present tonight,like a 6pack in his net

Posted by edillac from isolation on 04/05/12 at 07:29 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

so,is Fatso getting an retirement present tonight,like a 6pack in his net

Posted by edillac from isolation on 04/05/12 at 06:29 PM ET

i think you lost me, ed, but i like the 6 pack idea.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/05/12 at 07:33 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Toga. Toga. Toga. Toga!
Posted by mrfluffy from Long Beach on 04/05/12 at 06:13 PM ET

We’re on double secret probation, whatever that is. We can’t afford to have a toga party.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/05/12 at 07:35 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

i think you lost me, ed, but i like the 6 pack idea.
Posted by RWBill from the Land of 12 in 12. on 04/05/12 at 06:33 PM ET

Fatso = Broduer

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/05/12 at 07:36 PM ET

mrfluffy's avatar

Marty McRibb Brodeur?

Posted by mrfluffy from A wide spot on I-90 in Montana on 04/05/12 at 07:37 PM ET

mrfluffy's avatar

Bro Der.

Posted by mrfluffy from A wide spot on I-90 in Montana on 04/05/12 at 07:41 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

My motto for watching this Red Wings team:


Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/05/12 at 07:42 PM ET

Avatar

but i like the 6 pack idea

Yeah, pay him back for ‘95 finals, boys. Fill it up. Go all Roy on him.

Posted by Alex on 04/05/12 at 07:42 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Going to miss the LB tonight as I get to spend the evening educating my 11 cadets on the finer points of color guard…ing…whatever.  If I could only get one particular cadet to understand that him getting off step and then spending the next thirty feet trying to get back IN step only makes the other two behind him look like Blues fans.

It’s only the Debils…but LGRW!


Oh yeah .... and go Stars…but only for tonight.

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 04/05/12 at 07:47 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Thanks, Chief.

Hard to believe there are only 2 more games in the regular season.  Wings win tonight in regulation and Preds lose -> home ice is ours!

LET’S GO RED WINGS !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 04/05/12 at 08:01 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Evenin Bitches. Ahoy, Sailor.

80 down, 2 to go. 2 more points tonite is all I ask.

Let’s Roll.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/05/12 at 08:06 PM ET

Gary A$$ SUCK !!'s avatar

Glad Påsk pa er alla !!!!!  Let’s go Red Wings !!!

Posted by Gary A$$ SUCK !! from Fort Myers, Florida on 04/05/12 at 08:15 PM ET

Forlorn in VA's avatar

Evenin’ Bitches. 

I’m just gonna drop this piece of ridiculousness here. 

http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=Ih94tfqBII0#!

Found on Puck Daddy.

Posted by Forlorn in VA on 04/05/12 at 08:20 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

I’m in Bitches.

Maybe we try playing with a lead for a change, eh?

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/05/12 at 08:24 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Database Error: Unable to connect to your database. Your database appears to be turned off or the database connection settings in your config file are not correct. Please contact your hosting provider if the problem persists.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/05/12 at 08:24 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Well let’s just send em to the links early then, why bother playing.

The post season wouldn’t be the same if we weren’t all trying to chew our own legs off.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 04/05/12 at 08:29 PM ET

monkey's avatar

What the hell kind of start to a question is that?

It’s my question, I can start it any way I like.  Also, 1995 was a strike shortened season.  Strange and horrible things happened.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 04/05/12 at 08:30 PM ET

Trish's avatar

Pasha, Tuzzi and even Mule were acting like the switch was thrown.  We get Z, TPH and Flip acting and the rest of the Wings believing and we just might do this thing.
Photobucket
LGRW

Posted by Trish from Tampa/Clearwater FL on 04/05/12 at 08:31 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

The winning Wink. I love Mick!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/05/12 at 08:32 PM ET

Paul's avatar

Database error should be fixed.

Posted by Paul from Motown Area on 04/05/12 at 08:33 PM ET

calquake's avatar

I need a link for a friend… honest.

Posted by calquake on 04/05/12 at 08:33 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

FSD FEED

sounds like it is from inside of a whiskey barrel

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 04/05/12 at 08:33 PM ET

Since71's avatar

FSD link

http://www.firstrowsports.eu/watch/117202/1/watch-detroit-red-wings-vs-new-jersey-devils.html

Posted by Since71 from Bucharest, Romania on 04/05/12 at 08:34 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

1995 was a strike shortened season

Sumbitch. Now it makes sense. Never question the moral highground.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/05/12 at 08:34 PM ET

Since71's avatar

FSD FEED

sounds like it is from inside of a whiskey barrel

Excellent picture however.

Posted by Since71 from Bucharest, Romania on 04/05/12 at 08:35 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

“For 2 months since February 4 Hank Zetterberg has lead the Red Wings in goals and points.” - John Keating.

“Zetterberg is broken.” - primis.

ROFL.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/05/12 at 08:36 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

pregame song being sung

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 04/05/12 at 08:36 PM ET

SYF's avatar

I have a little time for the game as the Wranglers start play at 7 pm tonight.

Ahoy, Master Chief.  Perfectly encapsulating my rotten feelings once again.  How the fuch do you do that???

Two points, Wings.  And pot 10 goals behind the daddy uncle fatso.

Thanks, Yoop.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/05/12 at 08:38 PM ET

RedMenace's avatar

Okay folks, let’s get a full-game effort tonight.

Posted by RedMenace from the Church of Jesus Lashoff on 04/05/12 at 08:40 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Okay folks, let’s get a full-game effort tonight.

I see what you did there.

Posted by calquake on 04/05/12 at 08:41 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

moose on the forecheck?  nooo, can’t be

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/05/12 at 08:42 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

The whining maggots from St. Louis Game Time (or whatever the fuch it’s called) were in rare form last night.  Well worth checking out.  In a word, I’d describe the tone as shrill.  Seems they really hate them some Bert. 

LGRW!

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 04/05/12 at 08:42 PM ET

SYF's avatar

First line got some wheels.  Moose (graduating from Horse’s Ass) skating like it mattered.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/05/12 at 08:42 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Miller to Abber!  No finish.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/05/12 at 08:43 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

#3 line moving good early

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/05/12 at 08:43 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com