Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Two Goals And A Cloud Of Suck

I don't remember the exact statistic, but in 2009 Chris Osgood was like 55-0-0 when the Wings scored 3 goals.  That's astounding, especially when you consider I made it up.  But as with so many things with life when you're not quite a pharmacist's mate (good job Okie)?  Specifics don't really matter.  We actually argued about that ditty way back when, way back in the good old days when playoff berths were clinched well before the Ides of March.  It was a proven fact of life that Osgood rarely lost when spotted 3.

Clearly we all know where I'm going with this.  George brought us a nugget from our own Ken Kal today.

The Red Wings are 4-15-6 this season when scoring 2 goals or less, however, they are 16-0-2 when they score 3 or more

No lineup changes for the Wings tonite, except for Drew Miller's damaged digits.  Eaves is in, which leads me to this...

...I know.  I know I promised I wouldn't say bad things about Tick Tock or his congressionally appointed band of advisors to include but not limited to Al Sobotka, Rick Zombo, Champ Summers and Gerry Rafferty, and I said I wouldn't speak poorly of our Uncle Mike until the bad thing happens.  

But unless Todd Bertuzzi is well below, say, 80 percent?  Wouldn't it be a cool idea to, I don't know, get his big ass on the ice tonite?

I know we need Eaves' 8 minutes. I get it.  I'll stop.

If you're not drinking already I can't be your friend.  The Wings, who haven't won more than 3 in a row all year, need to win the next four.

RSV bitches. It's a Live Blog.

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Comments

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hockeychic's avatar

RSV!  All aboard!  GO WINGS!

Posted by hockeychic from Denver, CO on 04/22/13 at 06:22 PM ET

BC's avatar

I am convinced we will score, and often.

I am also hopeful Jimmy Howard shows up, and not Curly.

Posted by BC on 04/22/13 at 06:23 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

Here’s to hoping.. for a victory.

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 04/22/13 at 06:29 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Happy Birthday to Vladimir Ilyich Lenin;  Bolshevik, Marxist, Murderer, Executioner, master of brutal newspaper censorship, founder of the modern CCCP

Or as it’s known in this country, Earth Day.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/22/13 at 06:43 PM ET

Hockeytown Wax's avatar

Be prepared to drink a lot people ... you’ll want to permanently forget tonights game.

I lost all faith in this team when they were embarrassed on Gordie Howe’s birthday.

They embarrassed Gordie, themselves, and the entire franchise that day.

Posted by Hockeytown Wax from West Bloomfield, Mi. on 04/22/13 at 06:43 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

This is a playoff game when we are trailing in the series 2-0.  Lose and we have to win out, no questions.  We will be at the same point in time and space as both Dallas and PHX, 3 points behind CBJ with 3 games left.

Win with this game in hand, and we give ourselves some daylight, a position to pass and stay ahead of CBJ no matter if they win their last 2.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/22/13 at 06:47 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

I’m hopeful - which isn’t the same as optimistic.

DET, like they have done all season, will give reason to be optimistic one minute, and have you ready to hit the barf bag the next.

Been happening all season, which doesn’t get give a lot of optimism that its about to change.

The only constant is the “19” Band of bitches, come hell or high water.

LGRW

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/22/13 at 06:48 PM ET

Surfer Ken's avatar

Dear Red Wings,

If your not going to win 4 in a row to secure a playoff spot, please lose tonight so I can quit stressing out.

Thank you,

A Life Long Wings Fan

Posted by Surfer Ken from San Clemente on 04/22/13 at 06:50 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

need to win the next four.

RSV bitches. It’s a Live Blog.

Ahoy, hoy Bitches, Master Chief. Here’s to all 19 Wingaholics.

The best place on the interwebs is Here. Tonite.

Let’s Roll.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/22/13 at 06:53 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

I haven’t been this nervous for a regular season game #79 since, well, 1991, I guess.

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 04/22/13 at 06:53 PM ET

Down River Dan's avatar

Champ Summers…..man that is going deep….I remember his wife used to sit in the stands and blow a whistle when he came to bat.

Posted by Down River Dan on 04/22/13 at 06:58 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

I haven’t been this nervous for a regular season game #79 since, well, 1991, I guess.

Good thing I’m a bandwagoner. Wait…

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/22/13 at 06:59 PM ET

dougie's avatar

If you’re not drinking already I can’t be your friend.

Double Jameson shots make us BFF’s, then Chief

Wife is grilling a 3 inch bone in rib eye. Bloody meat, Jameson, Red Wings. The first 2 have never let me down.

Just get in. goddammit. That is all.

For now.

Posted by dougie on 04/22/13 at 07:01 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

I rarely imbibe. Tonite is the exception. I’ll be either very loud, or, extremely loud.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/22/13 at 07:03 PM ET

dougie's avatar

The only constant is the “19” Band of bitchers.

fixt

Posted by dougie on 04/22/13 at 07:05 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

I’ll be either very loud, or, extremely loud.

Perfect

Good thing I’m a bandwagoner. Wait…

Don’t tell me someone accused you of being a bandwagoner

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 04/22/13 at 07:08 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

extremely loud=EXTREMELY LOUD.

LETS GO RED WINGS!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/22/13 at 07:08 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

Last time the Wings (did that which must not be spoken), the NHL had 21 teams.

The good, ol’ days

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 04/22/13 at 07:09 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Ahoy, Sailor.  Slainte to you and yours.

Wife is grilling a 3 inch bone in rib eye. Bloody meat, Jameson, Red Wings. The first 2 have never let me down.

Posted by dougie on 04/22/13 at 07:01 PM ET


Delish, dougie. 

I’m in.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/13 at 07:11 PM ET

HockeytownOverhaul's avatar

The only constant is the “19” Band of bitchers.

fixt
   
    Posted by
     
    dougie
     
      on 04/22/13 at 07:05 PM ET

Aww, don’t be like that dougie.  Being a Ken Holland alter-boy just didn’t sound appealing.

Posted by HockeytownOverhaul on 04/22/13 at 07:14 PM ET

detroitredwings's avatar

Happy Birthday to Vladimir Ilyich Lenin;  Bolshevik, Marxist, Murderer, Executioner, master

of brutal newspaper censorship, founder of the modern CCCP

Or as it’s known in this country, Earth Day.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/22/13 at 06:43 PM ET

That’s brilliant:)

Posted by detroitredwings on 04/22/13 at 07:15 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

Don’t tell me someone accused you of being a bandwagoner

You’d be surprised. A lot by weird Americans, even more by people in here.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/22/13 at 07:15 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

NBC broadcast. Gypped again.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/22/13 at 07:17 PM ET

HockeytownOverhaul's avatar

It’s alright, Herm.  Some people just REALLY need everyone else to agree with them or make everyone else shut up.  Hard for people to hear coherent thoughtful insight on why you have a different opinion.  Some people are like “Cipher”, they’d rather get jacked back into the Matrix and pretend everything’s going to be fine.

Posted by HockeytownOverhaul on 04/22/13 at 07:18 PM ET

detroitredwings's avatar

NBC broadcast. Gypped again.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/22/13 at 07:17 PM ET

Yes.. I’ve paid for FOX Sports Package. Then I paid for Center Ice. And I get to watch Versus instead. Something is wrong in the state of Denmark.. hopefully I can find FSD feed and mute the TV.

Posted by detroitredwings on 04/22/13 at 07:24 PM ET

Yzersyuk's avatar

Evening 19. I pose a question: if you could call any one member of the red wings organization before this game started who would it be and what would you say?  As for myself id call Flip and say “Your brother’s twice the hockey player that you’ll ever be.” Then hang up, I’d that wont make him shoot more I don’t know what will

Posted by Yzersyuk on 04/22/13 at 07:25 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

NBC broadcast. Gypped again.

Oh joy, here comes Eddie Icepatch

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/22/13 at 07:26 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Tried something new yesterday:  Crispin Hard Cider.

Had a headache all friggin’ day long until I eased it down several hours later with a pint of Mint Chocolate Chip ice cream.  Yeah, yeah I know.  Ice cream and alcohol is a no-no, but hell, it worked.

Back to the regularly scheduled Guinness Draught.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/13 at 07:26 PM ET

cigar_nurse's avatar

Hola bitches. The Mule needs to get some payback on Doan tonight for that dirty hit in the playoffs a couple of years ago. Some curly fries would be good for that.
No excuses get er done one game at a time. Go Wings.

Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 04/22/13 at 07:27 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

[strong Lets Go Red Wings!!!]

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 04/22/13 at 07:27 PM ET

SYF's avatar

if you could call any one member of the red wings organization before this game started who would it be and what would you say?

Agree with Fils:  “You’re not worth the $5 you’re asking for.”

No, that is not a typo.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/13 at 07:28 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Waiting for other links and hoping none of them have that atrocious NBCSP feed.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 04/22/13 at 07:29 PM ET

Avatar

Anyone have a feed?

Posted by A II R on 04/22/13 at 07:29 PM ET

dougie's avatar

Aww, don’t be like that dougie.  Being a Ken Holland alter-boy just didn’t sound appealing.

Posted by HockeytownOverhaul on 04/22/13 at 07:14 PM ET

Understood. It was just too easy to pass up. I love you guys, and if I have to drink to hang out here, it is a sacrifice I am willing to make.

Once the season is over, I will hold Ken Holland’s hands down while the rest of us hammer in the spikes.

Posted by dougie on 04/22/13 at 07:29 PM ET

cigar_nurse's avatar

SYF. Is that the douche canoe with that steak sans glasses?

Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 04/22/13 at 07:30 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

At least its not Edzo - so there is that

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/22/13 at 07:32 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

Evening 19. I pose a question: if you could call any one member of the red wings organization before this game started who would it be and what would you say?

Franzén. Even if Flip woke up with my call, he’s not a difference maker.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/22/13 at 07:32 PM ET

Yzersyuk's avatar

Was also thinkin about Howard “Good goalies earn shutouts whn they’re team is playing well, great goalies earn shutouts wven when they’re team is playing piss poor.”

Posted by Yzersyuk on 04/22/13 at 07:32 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

What time is the game? I only leave class at 10.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/22/13 at 07:33 PM ET

dougie's avatar

John Forslund calling the game. He is an OK announcer, but not good enough to overcome the Douche Canoe and company.

At the end of the evening , tell me you prefer Doc Emerick to John Forslund, and I will slap you in the face with my d*ck.

Posted by dougie on 04/22/13 at 07:34 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com