Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

It’s Not Too Rough To Feed You and The Main Hatchway’s Still Stable

Al Gore won’t let me have the internet tonite so I’m flying blind, unable to deliver my usual stat-heavy, fact-based, unbiased lead in to yet another “most important regular season game of the year.”

It’s kind of liberating, really. Anything I’m about to say can be quibbled with and any grand proclamations can be refuted by me after the fact because I have no means to research a damn thing.  So, with that little built-in alibi, I can say this with great confidence.

This is precisely the kind of game the Wings win.  They dig “statement” games and always have.  The bitter bitch Blues fans, cranky because they haven’t won jack shit in forty years of existence, are undoubtedly feeling as if this is their year.  The one season they can expect their team to perform for the porky prick who will undoubtedly crush their very souls next season.  Winning for Ken Hitchcock is a nifty experience, but let the wheels wobble just a bit and wait for the emotional pain to wash over them in spades.  This, say Blues fans, has absolutely got to be their year.

No sane outsider south of Saskatchewan feels the Wings would have a shot in a 7-gamer against this team. Nobody.  Nobody outside us, the transplants and the tinfoil hatters, those of us deployed, tip tapping our way through another Kansas or Oklahoma spring.  Nobody outside the 19 of you seriously believe anything but sadness would await The Greatest Franchise In All of Sport if the playoffs started today.  And deed down where the drunken sadness lives, a lot of us would be hard-pressed to disagree with that.

But, curiously, the playoffs don’t start today.  Fortunately two critical games against baby butthole brothers remain and each one carries with it a chance for this team to regain the confidence baby Jesus, that adorable, drooling, swaddled and pink skinned, little bundle of promise, told us the Wings would have when April came she will.

Should the Wings win out and enter the playoffs with or without home-ice, we might be looking at something interesting.  Beat Chicago and St. Louis convincingly and the magical Swagger might just be back where it belongs.

So, it starts tonite. It must.  It starts tonite because a win tonite erases just a bit of that road-ice doubt.  A win tonite reminds the Blues what they are: bitches. Wing bitches and nothing more. 

Wings win tonite because that’s how it needs to begin, this last-minute rebirth, this frigging requiem to save a season that once held so much promise.  I don’t predict a Wing win out of blind, sick hope.  No. I say it because these are the kinds of games these guys have won for years, the games that leave peckerheads saying they wrote Detroit off a minute too soon.

It’s a Live Blog, bitches.

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Comments

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Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Switch flipped at 6:05 left in the third of Game 80.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from Warm and sunny SoCal on 04/04/12 at 10:17 PM ET

This is the year! 12 in ’12.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/05/12 at 12:20 AM ET

Trish's avatar

Switch flipped at 6:05 left in the third of Game 80.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from Warm and sunny SoCal on 04/04/12 at 10:17 PM ET

From your lips to the ears of the hockey gods
Photobucket

Posted by Trish from PalmBeachCntyFL on 04/05/12 at 12:25 AM ET

SoDakWIngNut's avatar

Boom! Go the Blose.

Awesome!

LGRW!

Posted by SoDakWIngNut from Rapid City, SD on 04/05/12 at 12:25 AM ET

RWBill's avatar

Bitch.

http://s917.photobucket.com/albums/ad15/RWBill/?action=view¤t=photobucket-4025-1333072955302.mp4

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/05/12 at 12:26 AM ET

RWBill's avatar

Datsyuk, voted best player in 6 categories by players.  No doubt.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/05/12 at 12:27 AM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

NJD at the Joe tomorrow night.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/05/12 at 12:28 AM ET

SoDakWIngNut's avatar

Posted by RWBill from the Land of 12 in 12. on 04/04/12 at 10:26 PM ET

+19!

Posted by SoDakWIngNut from Rapid City, SD on 04/05/12 at 12:28 AM ET

RWBill's avatar

Datsyuk, voted best player in 6 categories by players.  No doubt.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/05/12 at 12:29 AM ET

jimathor's avatar

Right, I’m going back to bed. I can watch these people talking tommorow.

Toodleoo!

Posted by jimathor from The land of Sir Humblepatch of Bumblehound on 04/05/12 at 12:30 AM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Datsyuk, voted best player in 6 categories by players.  No doubt.

Best player in the entire world.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/05/12 at 12:31 AM ET

RWBill's avatar

What The Fuch!?

I guess it was worth repeating.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/05/12 at 12:32 AM ET

Nate A's avatar

NJD at the Joe tomorrow night.

Yeah, somehow I decided it would be a good idea to go. 2nd of a back to back, team playing wildly inconsistent hockey, “meaningless” end of season game against a boring NJ team. The hell was I thinking?

Oh yeah. Lidstrom bobble head.

Just tell me they’re going to bring some of this momentum stuff with em.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 04/05/12 at 12:33 AM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Wings win tonite because that’s how it needs to begin, this last-minute rebirth, this frigging requiem to save a season that once held so much promise.  I don’t predict a Wing win out of blind, sick hope.  No. I say it because these are the kinds of games these guys have won for years, the games that leave peckerheads saying they wrote Detroit off a minute too soon.


The Master Chief. Truer words were never written.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/05/12 at 12:33 AM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

See ya bitches tomorrow.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/05/12 at 12:35 AM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Switch flipped at 6:05 left in the third of Game 80.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from Warm and sunny SoCal on 04/04/12 at 10:17 PM ET

Your words are marked.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 04/05/12 at 12:40 AM ET

RWBill's avatar


Whoever figures out why this team doesn’t get embarrassed and start to play until the final 10 minutes wins a pony.
Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 04/04/12 at 10:07 PM ET

datsyuk on pony

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 04/05/12 at 12:40 AM ET

monkey's avatar

50 wins or bust

Posted by monkey from Finland on 04/05/12 at 12:47 AM ET

cainer4wingsglory's avatar

against a boring NJ team

They aren’t so boring anymore actually. The Devils have some dynamic offensive guys now. Look at it this way, you’re just getting an in-person look at our future top line RW Parise. Go Wings!

Posted by cainer4wingsglory on 04/05/12 at 12:51 AM ET

WestWing's avatar

Interesting quotes from Flyer assistant coach Craig Berube.  In a league where most players and coaches rely on bland, cliché, politically correct responses, this is kinda refreshing.  It’s nothing a lot of us haven’t probably already thought, but it’s kinda cool to hear someone come right out and say


A late-game melee between the Penguins and Flyers in Saturday’s 6-4 Flyers win was sparked in part by a cross-check from the Flyers’ Brayden Schenn to the middle of Crosby’s back that knocked the Pittsburgh captain to the ice.

“Crosby and Malkin are the dirtiest players on their hockey team. They slash, they punch guys in the face—they do all these little things.”—Flyers’ assistant coach Craig Berube

“I have no problem with what Schenn does,” Berube said. “If someone runs him [Crosby] over, that’s great; they should run him over. This guy gets away with too much, in my opinion. He whines to the refs all day and all night. It’s a joke. The guy did something to [Schenn] a little bit earlier, so he just gave him a little shot. Not like it was a tough, bad cross-check; but the guy dove.”

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 04/05/12 at 12:57 AM ET

redxblack's avatar

after st lose’s second goal, I shut off the tv in disgust. 30 seconds later, I turned it back on - just in time to see Franzen remember why he collects a paycheck. Twice.

it was beautiful.

Posted by redxblack from Akron Ohio on 04/05/12 at 02:33 AM ET

42jeff's avatar

after st lose’s second goal, I shut off the tv in disgust. 30 seconds later, I turned it back on - just in time to see Franzen remember why he collects a paycheck. Twice.
it was beautiful.
Posted by redxblack from Akron Ohio on 04/05/12 at 12:33 AM ET

I hate to admit I did something similar.  We had a vote at our church on buying a new building since our previous one was desroyed in last summer’s flood tonight and had to DVR the game.  AFter the second goal I though, “well shit” and started fast forwarding.  I stopped at the first goal hoping that I was witnessing the start of a comeback.

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 04/05/12 at 10:17 AM ET

Cwix's avatar

12 straight years of 100 points accomplished in 2012. Now follow the natural progression, boys… Just sayin’

Posted by Cwix from Grand Rapids, now Roanoke, VA on 04/05/12 at 11:39 AM ET

SYF's avatar

Youtube user, paustn31634, has posted the entire third period of the Wings CFB win over the B’Lose.

I watched just the last 6:30 of the third and the Wings were down 1-2.  I almost shut off the PC but Franzen decides that it’s better that I just stick around for a little bit.  Ass…  Where the hell have you been this whole time.

Posted by SYF from Zata's Epic Viking Beard on 04/05/12 at 06:16 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com