My five reasons for hating the Red Wings.... by Phil Bausk or @LoveShaqBaby (me: a hockey fan?) of BlackhawkUp at Fansided,

That Damn Octopus

Every time I see it on SportsCenter I gag a little bit. (me: Watc​hing Sportscenter for hockey coverage?)

Brendan Shanahan

I am a bit young to recall his days with the New Jersey Devils and the St. Louis Blues, but even if I could.. (me: stop right there, a bit young...)

30 Years of Happiness

Since 1983, no team in the NHL has been as consistently good as the Red Wings. (me: uh, ok)

Boring Jerseys

The Red Wings jerseys make me want to vomit. They are so boring, and they haven’t changed in years. (me: haven't changed in years is a good thing)

For Taking Chris Chelios

at the ripe age of 12, I was quite unfamiliar with the entire trade/free agency process. When I heard Chelios was going to Detroit, I threw a hockey puck at my bedroom wall. (me: By age 12 I could recite every player on every team, knew where they were born, what they had for dinner last night, etc.)