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Abel to Yzerman

Hey Edzo, C’mon In And Suck On This Live Blog

Live on OLN!

For most of you anyway.  One of the Armed Forces Network channels we get will be airing the NFL, and I understand that. The other is playing the Army/Navy basketball game, and this is absolutely idiotic. Look, I’m as Joe Navy as the next guy..but Holy. Hell. Nobody wants to see that. Nobody’s gonna watch it. Nobody cares. Oh and by the way, AFN? You can suck it right along with Edzo.  11 NBA games on AFN Sports next week. One NHL game.

Here are the things I predict will happen today:

—Johan Franzen will take Patrick Kane’s mouthpiece and stick it straight up Steve Montador’s ass. Edzo will find that offensive.
—James F. Tiberius Howard will freeze the puck, stop the puck, kick the puck, lick the puck, juggle the puck, headbutt the puck and give the puck eskimo kisses instead of letting it go by him.  Again, this won’t be received well by Edzo.
—Some prankster will hold up a sign that has the word “camel” and “toe(w)s” in it, just like that. It will be aired and it will be funny.  Edzo will cross his legs.
—My Uncle Mike Babcock will tell the Douche Canoe that he can’t wait to get busy in that Big House because he’s pretty damn sure it’s the only place big enough to contain the awesomeness that is Nick Lidstrom.  Yes, TPH will be playing.
—Jonathon Toews and Hank Zetterberg will have a discussion after the whistle and it will be something along these lines…

Toews: “Those Blues, man they’re looking tough.  Three team race, eh?”
Zetterberg…silence
Zetterberg…“You’re not serious are you?”
Toews…“Fuch no”

Game 3 of the WCF preview is today in Hockeytown on OLN with Edzo and the Douche Canoe and 20,000 Hawk-hating patriots. 

It’s a Live Blog, bitches.

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Comments

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stayouttamalibu's avatar

Perfect tip by Homer. What a great passing sequence to lead to that shot.

Posted by stayouttamalibu from California on 01/14/12 at 04:01 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

was that st. nick?

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 04:02 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

Homer with the Hawk Eyes.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from Where the GM likes his team. on 01/14/12 at 04:02 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Morning 19…

Goal for Homer!!!!

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 01/14/12 at 04:02 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

HOMER AGAIN!!! get at us trolls GET AT US!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by pgoody on 01/14/12 at 04:02 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

WHITE POWER

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 01/14/12 at 01:00 PM ET

Not sure if that one is going to catch on my friend lol.

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 01/14/12 at 04:02 PM ET

SolidTG7's avatar

TPH would never make friends with Corey Perry, unless it was to gain his trust and take him out when he least expects it.

He’s too classy to do that plus its not even necessary.

Posted by SolidTG7 on 01/14/12 at 04:02 PM ET

SoDakWIngNut's avatar

Goal biatches! Homer with the redirect.

NBC: “Outstanding acrobatic skills by Crawford to slightly slow down that pick with the sleeve as the puck whizzed through his 7-hole.”

Posted by SoDakWIngNut from Rapid City, SD on 01/14/12 at 04:04 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

Red Wings Suck.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from Where the GM likes his team. on 01/14/12 at 04:04 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

Woah, jimmy.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 01/14/12 at 04:04 PM ET

stayouttamalibu's avatar

Holy shit Jimmah.

Posted by stayouttamalibu from California on 01/14/12 at 04:04 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

JIMMAH

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 04:04 PM ET

SolidTG7's avatar

That was lucky as hell…

Posted by SolidTG7 on 01/14/12 at 04:05 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

Cawk block by JIMMAH

Posted by pgoody on 01/14/12 at 04:05 PM ET

Down River Dan's avatar

midway through the period and no mention by edzo of the lively boards or too many men on the ice…oops spoke too soon

Posted by Down River Dan on 01/14/12 at 04:05 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

I pulled my groin on that save.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from Where the GM likes his team. on 01/14/12 at 04:05 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

He’s too classy to do that plus its not even necessary.

Posted by SolidTG7 on 01/14/12 at 01:02 PM ET

Well I never said he wouldn’t do it without a tuxedo and a martini.

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 01/14/12 at 04:05 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

12:56 PPG - Tomas Holmstrom (7) Tip-In - Assists: I. White (17) & P. Datsyuk (32)

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

Avatar

Bouncy puck meet Jimmy’s dong

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

That was lucky as hell…

Posted by SolidTG7 on 01/14/12 at 01:05 PM ET

Good to be lucky. Lucky to be good.
.
Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

“The active boards at Joe Louis Arena…”

“The Detroit Red Wings…the oldest team in hockey…”

“The 41 year old Niklas Lidstrom…”

Blah blah blah

WOO *#$%@& BERt

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

package is in the mail. Hell yes

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

Boom.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from Where the GM likes his team. on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

stayouttamalibu's avatar

YES.

Posted by stayouttamalibu from California on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

Yeah BERT!

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

SolidTG7's avatar

No penalty shot?  What a pass!

Posted by SolidTG7 on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Psycho Killer off a sweet feed from #13!!!

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Unibomber!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Wait…was that too many men on the ice?

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 04:06 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

Hands of a murderer are downy soft…

Posted by pgoody on 01/14/12 at 04:07 PM ET

SoDakWIngNut's avatar

Awesome! The Serial Killer sneaks in for the kill.

Posted by SoDakWIngNut from Rapid City, SD on 01/14/12 at 04:07 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

break away by the serial killer

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 04:07 PM ET

Joe Z.'s avatar

Todzilla! yes!

Posted by Joe Z. from Austria on 01/14/12 at 04:07 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Jimmah!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 04:08 PM ET

SolidTG7's avatar

Well I never said he wouldn’t do it without a tuxedo and a martini.

LOL good point

Posted by SolidTG7 on 01/14/12 at 04:08 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

What a pass from the Magic man.  Nobody sees the ice like him.. No.  Body.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from Where the GM likes his team. on 01/14/12 at 04:08 PM ET

stayouttamalibu's avatar

What an unreal pass by Pavel.

Posted by stayouttamalibu from California on 01/14/12 at 04:08 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

16:10 Todd Bertuzzi Backhand - Assists: P. Datsyuk

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 04:08 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

Fuching serial killer.  Skate to throat bitches.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 01/14/12 at 04:09 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Fuching serial killer.  Skate to throat bitches.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 01/14/12 at 01:09 PM ET

Hellz yes Chief.

Hey give em hell, eh?  Us zoomies got your back.

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 04:10 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com