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Abel to Yzerman

Hey Edzo, C’mon In And Suck On This Live Blog

Live on OLN!

For most of you anyway.  One of the Armed Forces Network channels we get will be airing the NFL, and I understand that. The other is playing the Army/Navy basketball game, and this is absolutely idiotic. Look, I’m as Joe Navy as the next guy..but Holy. Hell. Nobody wants to see that. Nobody’s gonna watch it. Nobody cares. Oh and by the way, AFN? You can suck it right along with Edzo.  11 NBA games on AFN Sports next week. One NHL game.

Here are the things I predict will happen today:

—Johan Franzen will take Patrick Kane’s mouthpiece and stick it straight up Steve Montador’s ass. Edzo will find that offensive.
—James F. Tiberius Howard will freeze the puck, stop the puck, kick the puck, lick the puck, juggle the puck, headbutt the puck and give the puck eskimo kisses instead of letting it go by him.  Again, this won’t be received well by Edzo.
—Some prankster will hold up a sign that has the word “camel” and “toe(w)s” in it, just like that. It will be aired and it will be funny.  Edzo will cross his legs.
—My Uncle Mike Babcock will tell the Douche Canoe that he can’t wait to get busy in that Big House because he’s pretty damn sure it’s the only place big enough to contain the awesomeness that is Nick Lidstrom.  Yes, TPH will be playing.
—Jonathon Toews and Hank Zetterberg will have a discussion after the whistle and it will be something along these lines…

Toews: “Those Blues, man they’re looking tough.  Three team race, eh?”
Zetterberg…silence
Zetterberg…“You’re not serious are you?”
Toews…“Fuch no”

Game 3 of the WCF preview is today in Hockeytown on OLN with Edzo and the Douche Canoe and 20,000 Hawk-hating patriots. 

It’s a Live Blog, bitches.

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Comments

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pgoody's avatar

Its really hard to try and hate on Toews

Posted by pgoody on 01/14/12 at 05:12 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Hey are there any decent places to watch hockey around Warrensburg, MO?  I’m heading down to Whiteman AFB next week to help out with an inspection and will be there for a week.

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 05:12 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Its really hard to try and hate on Toews

Posted by pgoody on 01/14/12 at 02:12 PM ET

Agree - except for his occasional diving, he seems like a decent guy.

LET’S GO RED WINGS !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 01/14/12 at 05:15 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

I posted this yesterday in Malik’s blog.  Any thoughts?

An Original Six Winter Classic Tournament.

The teams would be seeded according to their position in the standings at the start of the tourney.  The first and second place teams, according to standings, would meet the winners of the lower seeded games.

The 5th and 6th place teams would play the first game on Monday, the winner to meet the 1st place team on Wednesday.

The 3rd and 4th place teams would play the second game on Tuesday, the winners to meet the 2nd place team on Thursday.

The winners of the Wednesday and Thursday games would then play for the Winter Classic Championship on Saturday.

I haven’t delved deep enough into how this would fit into an 82 game schedule.  I just think it’s a cool idea.

Of course the Wings will win every year.

The following would be according to the standings on 1/13/12.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from Where the GM likes his team. on 01/14/12 at 05:17 PM ET

SoDakWIngNut's avatar

After 5 mins of 20cent stroking we get “Oh, and the Wings are winning 2 to 0” then we get the credit card commercial starring 20cent.

Gahhh….

Posted by SoDakWIngNut from Rapid City, SD on 01/14/12 at 05:20 PM ET

HockeyTownTodd's avatar

Its really hard to try and hate on Toews
Posted by pgoody on 01/14/12

I’ve noticed that whenever a Blackhawk is asked about the Red Wings, no matter what the answer is,they all sound clinically depressed.

Posted by HockeyTownTodd on 01/14/12 at 05:20 PM ET

SoDakWIngNut's avatar

errr…sorry Cawks fans…2-1. Hard typing with one hand on the keyboard and the other on the gun.

Posted by SoDakWIngNut from Rapid City, SD on 01/14/12 at 05:21 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

3rd period.  Time to finish this bitch

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 01/14/12 at 05:23 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Listen to Edzo.  ooooooooooooooooooooh that was close.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 01/14/12 at 05:25 PM ET

SoDakWIngNut's avatar

I would LOVE to see Mule rip the mouthpiece out of Kane’s pouty mouth and throw it on the ice again.

Posted by SoDakWIngNut from Rapid City, SD on 01/14/12 at 05:26 PM ET

stayouttamalibu's avatar

Jesus Wings, clear the fuching puck and gain some possession.

Posted by stayouttamalibu from California on 01/14/12 at 05:26 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

Sleeping to start the period again.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 01/14/12 at 05:26 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Detroit really getting hemmed in.  Yikes.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 01/14/12 at 05:26 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Jimmah!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 05:26 PM ET

SolidTG7's avatar

This just in, the 3rd period has started, someone let the Wings know.

Posted by SolidTG7 on 01/14/12 at 05:26 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

wings are playing like they are on a PK

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 05:27 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Wow.  Horrible start to the 3rd

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 01/14/12 at 05:27 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

Oh for fuchs sake. Jimmy cant win this by himself.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 01/14/12 at 05:28 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

This just in, the 3rd period has started, someone let the Wings know.

Posted by SolidTG7 on 01/14/12 at 02:26 PM ET

Fuching-A.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 05:28 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

wings are playing like they are on 5 on 3 PK

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 02:27 PM ET

fixt

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 01/14/12 at 05:28 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

This is ridiculous.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from Where the GM likes his team. on 01/14/12 at 05:28 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

SOG early for the third. 0-6 ‘awks

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 05:29 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Come on Wings! Assimilate!

Jimmah!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 05:30 PM ET

Avatar

Too many cute passes the wrong way…..get it deep already.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 01/14/12 at 05:30 PM ET

SolidTG7's avatar

Time for a goal against the run of play.

Posted by SolidTG7 on 01/14/12 at 05:30 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

hawks are hungry…..
Lets Go Red WINGS!

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 01/14/12 at 05:31 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

First time in history Dick Vitale has nothing to say

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 05:32 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

Thank you TV timeout.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 01/14/12 at 05:32 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

The 2011-12 Red Wings on full display today. the good, the bad and now in the 3rd, the UGLY.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 01/14/12 at 05:33 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

wings PP is this the only way we are able break up the ‘awks play?

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 05:33 PM ET

SoDakWIngNut's avatar

Yeah, that’s it #65, if you stick your fingers up your nose far enough you will eventually get blood. Too bad the penalty is on your team.

Posted by SoDakWIngNut from Rapid City, SD on 01/14/12 at 05:33 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

Falling into a stick results in low facing penalty.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 01/14/12 at 05:33 PM ET

SolidTG7's avatar

Well this game is likely tied.

Posted by SolidTG7 on 01/14/12 at 05:33 PM ET

Avatar

That call’s crap….Miller’s stick was waist fuching high.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 01/14/12 at 05:34 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

I smell big trouble.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 01/14/12 at 05:34 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

lovely

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 05:34 PM ET

stayouttamalibu's avatar

Great.

Posted by stayouttamalibu from California on 01/14/12 at 05:34 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Of course a double minor. No blood.

Double Shorty.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 05:34 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

what? miller with the penalty?

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 05:34 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Jimmah doing cartwheels.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 05:35 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com