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Abel to Yzerman

Hey Edzo, C’mon In And Suck On This Live Blog

Live on OLN!

For most of you anyway.  One of the Armed Forces Network channels we get will be airing the NFL, and I understand that. The other is playing the Army/Navy basketball game, and this is absolutely idiotic. Look, I’m as Joe Navy as the next guy..but Holy. Hell. Nobody wants to see that. Nobody’s gonna watch it. Nobody cares. Oh and by the way, AFN? You can suck it right along with Edzo.  11 NBA games on AFN Sports next week. One NHL game.

Here are the things I predict will happen today:

—Johan Franzen will take Patrick Kane’s mouthpiece and stick it straight up Steve Montador’s ass. Edzo will find that offensive.
—James F. Tiberius Howard will freeze the puck, stop the puck, kick the puck, lick the puck, juggle the puck, headbutt the puck and give the puck eskimo kisses instead of letting it go by him.  Again, this won’t be received well by Edzo.
—Some prankster will hold up a sign that has the word “camel” and “toe(w)s” in it, just like that. It will be aired and it will be funny.  Edzo will cross his legs.
—My Uncle Mike Babcock will tell the Douche Canoe that he can’t wait to get busy in that Big House because he’s pretty damn sure it’s the only place big enough to contain the awesomeness that is Nick Lidstrom.  Yes, TPH will be playing.
—Jonathon Toews and Hank Zetterberg will have a discussion after the whistle and it will be something along these lines…

Toews: “Those Blues, man they’re looking tough.  Three team race, eh?”
Zetterberg…silence
Zetterberg…“You’re not serious are you?”
Toews…“Fuch no”

Game 3 of the WCF preview is today in Hockeytown on OLN with Edzo and the Douche Canoe and 20,000 Hawk-hating patriots. 

It’s a Live Blog, bitches.

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Comments

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stayouttamalibu's avatar

Holy Jimmah.

Posted by stayouttamalibu from California on 01/14/12 at 04:55 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Suck it Kane

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 04:55 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Jimmah!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 04:55 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

Jimmah with the trifecta of huge balls saves.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from where free agents no longer dare. on 01/14/12 at 04:56 PM ET

Avatar

I might like watching 20 Cent get stoned more than getting stoned meself.

Posted by LGRWeh on 01/14/12 at 04:56 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

Yikes. 2 oddball plays off the wall.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

fuchin crimney

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

Avatar

Lot’s of bad bounces all day….finally got bit in the ass.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Well that sucks dog balls.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Jimmah?

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Fuch.  Stay in the net James

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

That sucked.  Fuching lively boards.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from where free agents no longer dare. on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

All Jimmy

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

stayouttamalibu's avatar

Fuch me.

Posted by stayouttamalibu from California on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

SolidTG7's avatar

Good Lord

Posted by SolidTG7 on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

He almost missed…..

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, doing the pre-season shuffle.... on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

SoDakWIngNut's avatar

Sweet Dreams Chief.

Posted by SoDakWIngNut from Rapid City, SD on 01/14/12 at 04:57 PM ET

Joe Z.'s avatar

Jimmy… there you go, your first pencil

Posted by Joe Z. from Austria on 01/14/12 at 04:58 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

that is why i don’t like goalies playing the puck

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 04:58 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

What…no Penalty shot?

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 04:58 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

No penalty shot?  Shocking.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 01/14/12 at 04:58 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

Zamboni doors screwed jimmy.

And E52 -after being blissfully invisible all game- takes a hooking penalty. Cool

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 01/14/12 at 04:58 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

Jimmy… there you go, your first pencil

give one of them to e52.

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 04:59 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Of course the penalties begin. The Wings are sooooooooooooooo overdue for a SHORTY. Bitches

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 05:00 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 05:00 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

Only a hall-of-famer could make that shot though.  Skill.

Eddie must have jizzed his pants.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from where free agents no longer dare. on 01/14/12 at 05:00 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Oh James.  Huge mistake there. 

Shake it off and get back in it, Wings.

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 01/14/12 at 05:00 PM ET

cainer4wingsglory's avatar

What is it gonna take to get Errorson out of the lineup??

Posted by cainer4wingsglory on 01/14/12 at 05:01 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

What is it gonna take to get Errorson out of the lineup??

Posted by cainer4wingsglory on 01/14/12 at 02:01 PM ET

Lead poisoning

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 05:02 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

Killed.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from where free agents no longer dare. on 01/14/12 at 05:02 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

What is it gonna take to get Errorson out of the lineup??

half a bag of pucks, and be willing to pay all his money no matter what team we send in to?

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 05:02 PM ET

Nate A's avatar

What is it gonna take to get Errorson out of the lineup??

Maybe Hudler can arrange for some nice ladies to pull his groin.

Posted by Nate A from Detroit-ish on 01/14/12 at 05:03 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

Sphincter minute.  Pucker up.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from where free agents no longer dare. on 01/14/12 at 05:04 PM ET

Avatar

What is it gonna take to get Errorson out of the lineup??

Posted by cainer4wingsglory on 01/14/12 at 02:01 PM ET

Ericsson’s had a solid game, and the “hooking” wasn’t any worse than stuff that’s been going on all game with no calls.  That was a weak one.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 01/14/12 at 05:04 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Big Rig is never gonna get dropped.  He definately doesn’t deserve the position he has now.  If he was gonna be scratched it would have happened already.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 01/14/12 at 05:05 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Ericsson’s had a solid game, and the “hooking” wasn’t any worse than stuff that’s been going on all game with no calls.  That was a weak one.

Posted by Valek on 01/14/12 at 02:04 PM ET

That is true.  But still a valid question.

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/14/12 at 05:06 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Well, the Squawks only goal was a gift.  They didn’t earn it.  Wings still own this game.

LET’S GO RED WINGS !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 01/14/12 at 05:06 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

SOG 29-11 wings after 2.

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/14/12 at 05:08 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Ericsson’s had a solid game, and the “hooking” wasn’t any worse than stuff that’s been going on all game with no calls.  That was a weak one.

Posted by Valek on 01/14/12 at 02:04 PM ET

Agreed. He’s had a couple of decent games lately. No jinx.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/14/12 at 05:08 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

Later gang.  I have to take Hockeydog to the vet.

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, doing the pre-season shuffle.... on 01/14/12 at 05:12 PM ET

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Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com