Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Do Not Be Ashamed…It’s Happened To Bankers, Lawyers, Cops and Happy Czech Oompa Loompas

I worked Seger and our Happy Hudler into the same post title, and talked about hookers without even having "hookers" as a phrase that will catch the spammers.  Of course, the ads here on KK should be interesting for a few days.

I digress. As usual.  Hey guess what Ryan Getzlaf's faceoff stats are through four games?

He's taken 92 faceoffs and won 0.

That's a lie but it's an educated lie.

The Wings have owned him.  Datsyuk has owned him.  Zetterberg: owned him. Andersson: owned him.  Gilchrist: owned him. 

By and large, he's done nothing.  By and larger, Z and our Russian Prince have been amazing.  Tough, tireless, terrific..just like Mitch would say (our delicate genius).  Corey Perry?

That little dumpster diver hasn't done dick. 

Two ways to look at that: Wings are dominating their best players, but still tied 2-2.  Or, Wings have held them down and that can't last for long. 

Either way, it's a good reason to just start pounding warm PBR right now.

Gary's starting this game at 8 on the West Coast. (NEVERMIND IT'S 7, I THOUGHT IT WAS 8.  SHIT.) Seriously, that's late even for those of us ON the West Coast.  You suckers have to stay up until at least 2. And you will. Every single one of you.

It's a Live Blog, bitches.  Take us to 6. Get us back to the Joe with a chance to clinch in front of that madhhouse. 

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Comments

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CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

JIMMAH!!!!!!!

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

MoreShoot's avatar

DDDDDDOOONG!

Posted by MoreShoot on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

JimmaH!

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

The Dong is massive tonight.  Holy fuch.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from where free agents no longer dare. on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

WOW

Jimmah

just WOW

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

SYF's avatar

DONG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

And fuch you, Fairy.  Fuch.You.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Hank owes Jimmah a hooker.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

JIMMAH!

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, hanging with Dan Cleary.... on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

Norskirama's avatar

Hmmm… puck jacker?

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 05/08/13 at 10:36 PM ET

Yeah, I winced at that, too.  They must have a list of “cute terms to work into the broadcast”.

Posted by Norskirama from Lincoln, Nebraska on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

Avatar

Anyone plan on helping Jimmy out? Jeebus

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

Mandingo's avatar

They cannot go on like this. So weak on the puck. Howard bails their ass out AGAIN.

Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

Avatar

JIMMMAHHHH!!!!!

Posted by CJBear71 on 05/08/13 at 10:39 PM ET

Avatar

Come on Z—-screw the fancy stuff.  Jimmy!!!!!!!!!!

Posted by Jeff from CO. on 05/08/13 at 10:39 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

DET need to start fuching playing

Its just a miracle they are leading

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 05/08/13 at 10:39 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Z was gassed and could not get to that loose puck any faster. Lucky that Jimmah bailed them out

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/08/13 at 10:39 PM ET

VooX's avatar

Leafs implode ar home after leading 2-0 after the first period.  The Wings’ kids might be green in the playoffs but we have some experience.  The Leafs are completely unprepared for what playoff hockey is all about.

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 05/08/13 at 10:39 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

TELL ME HE’S NOT WORTH $5 MILLION SO I CAN SLAP YOU WITH HIS DONG.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/08/13 at 10:39 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

Jesus Fuching DONG!

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 05/08/13 at 10:40 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

YOU FUCHING IDIOTS WTF OMG

Posted by pgoody on 05/08/13 at 10:40 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

HOly damn DONG!!

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 05/08/13 at 10:40 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

JIMMAH TIBERIUS FUCHING HOWARD!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 05/08/13 at 10:40 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

omfg   how many fuching   turnovers do they think they can survive ??????

thank 8 pound baby jesucristo and jimmy howard.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 05/08/13 at 10:40 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Don’t know what game you guys are watching. A stick to the head (even accidental) that knocks a helmet off will and should be called 100% of the time. Mule through that guy into the boards.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from Warm and sunny SoCal on 05/08/13 at 10:37 PM ET

The second one was a penalty 365 days a week.  But Mule kind pushed that guy and his skate caught a rut and he went in kinda nasty.  Not Mule’s fault, but it’s gonna get called more often than not.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 05/08/13 at 10:40 PM ET

detroitredwings's avatar

LOL @ Perry

Posted by detroitredwings on 05/08/13 at 10:40 PM ET

SYF's avatar

chuBBy is a small man.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 05/08/13 at 10:40 PM ET

Mandingo's avatar

DET need to start fuching playing

Its just a miracle they are leading

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 22 on 05/08/13 at 10:39 PM ET

Anaheim could legitimately be up 4-1 right now. This is some of the worst hockey the Wings have played all series (minus Howard).

Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 05/08/13 at 10:40 PM ET

Wings_in_NYC's avatar

perry’s going to go ape sheet tonight. should be entertaining to see that meltdown.

Posted by Wings_in_NYC on 05/08/13 at 10:40 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 05/08/13 at 10:41 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

What’s the cliche?  Gripping the sticks too tight?

The Wings are being dominated so far.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from where free agents no longer dare. on 05/08/13 at 10:41 PM ET

BC's avatar

DInosaur Dong!

Posted by BC on 05/08/13 at 10:41 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

The Wings are being dominated so far.

scoreboard.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/08/13 at 10:42 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Respect Smitty’s Autoritaaay…

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 05/08/13 at 10:42 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 05/08/13 at 10:42 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Playing three fourths of the time in your defensive zone is not a recipe for victory—Captain Obvious

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/08/13 at 10:43 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

gawd dammit how many of those near misses are we gonna have in one series ???

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 05/08/13 at 10:43 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

The Wings are being dominated so far.

scoreboard.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/08/13 at 10:42 PM ET

I’m afraid that is temporary if things don’t shape up.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 05/08/13 at 10:43 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

scoreboard.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/08/13 at 10:42 PM ET

That’s what I’m saying!  LGRW!

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 05/08/13 at 10:43 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

Posted by Wings_in_NYC on 05/08/13 at 10:40 PM ET

Agree.

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, hanging with Dan Cleary.... on 05/08/13 at 10:44 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Nice play, Kronner.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 05/08/13 at 10:44 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Babcock must be employing the rope-a-dope strategy

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 05/08/13 at 10:45 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com