Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Do Not Be Ashamed…It’s Happened To Bankers, Lawyers, Cops and Happy Czech Oompa Loompas

I worked Seger and our Happy Hudler into the same post title, and talked about hookers without even having "hookers" as a phrase that will catch the spammers.  Of course, the ads here on KK should be interesting for a few days.

I digress. As usual.  Hey guess what Ryan Getzlaf's faceoff stats are through four games?

He's taken 92 faceoffs and won 0.

That's a lie but it's an educated lie.

The Wings have owned him.  Datsyuk has owned him.  Zetterberg: owned him. Andersson: owned him.  Gilchrist: owned him. 

By and large, he's done nothing.  By and larger, Z and our Russian Prince have been amazing.  Tough, tireless, terrific..just like Mitch would say (our delicate genius).  Corey Perry?

That little dumpster diver hasn't done dick. 

Two ways to look at that: Wings are dominating their best players, but still tied 2-2.  Or, Wings have held them down and that can't last for long. 

Either way, it's a good reason to just start pounding warm PBR right now.

Gary's starting this game at 8 on the West Coast. (NEVERMIND IT'S 7, I THOUGHT IT WAS 8.  SHIT.) Seriously, that's late even for those of us ON the West Coast.  You suckers have to stay up until at least 2. And you will. Every single one of you.

It's a Live Blog, bitches.  Take us to 6. Get us back to the Joe with a chance to clinch in front of that madhhouse. 

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Comments

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Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Aye, Smith is MIA

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 05/08/13 at 10:32 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

JIMMAH flashing the dong

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/08/13 at 10:32 PM ET

Avatar

Jimmy is on his game tonite.

Posted by Jeff from CO. on 05/08/13 at 10:32 PM ET

VooX's avatar

Mule draws a BS penalty.  Bett-phone was ringing and the officials answered the call.

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 05/08/13 at 10:32 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

That was a lucky clear Z.

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 05/08/13 at 10:32 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

Gotta at least act like you are going for the puck GODMANTI!

Posted by pgoody on 05/08/13 at 10:32 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Dong.Hoge.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 05/08/13 at 10:32 PM ET

MoreShoot's avatar

No. He was kicking Jimmah’s Dong several times.

Dong power must win out.

Posted by MoreShoot on 05/08/13 at 10:33 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

Holy DONG!

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 05/08/13 at 10:33 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

They look like the Keystone Kops trying to clear the zone

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/08/13 at 10:33 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

DONG

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/08/13 at 10:33 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Jimmy is feeling it

too bad no one else seems interested in keeping the puck outta the net

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 05/08/13 at 10:33 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

E-52 looking like the Big Rig.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 05/08/13 at 10:33 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

looks a little “frosty” out there.

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, doing the prospect shuffle.... on 05/08/13 at 10:33 PM ET

Mandingo's avatar

The D-men look absolutely terrible tonight.

Terrible.

Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 05/08/13 at 10:33 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

Dicks are dumping it on the PP…good sign.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 05/08/13 at 10:33 PM ET

WingsFanInBeanLand's avatar

DONG!

What’s the douche level of the Refs tonight?

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, DuhUck hunting….whore style on 05/08/13 at 10:32 PM ET

They’ve gone to plaid.

Posted by WingsFanInBeanLand from where free agents no longer dare. on 05/08/13 at 10:34 PM ET

SYF's avatar

What a weak call.

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 05/08/13 at 10:34 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Andersson is a freaking stud

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 05/08/13 at 10:34 PM ET

Mandingo's avatar

Jimmy Howard is going to have to play the game of his career tonight, because he’s not going to have any help.

Posted by Mandingo from The Garage on 05/08/13 at 10:35 PM ET

ITDeuce's avatar

Geez.

Posted by ITDeuce from The Sunny High Desert on 05/08/13 at 10:35 PM ET

Itrusteddrrahmani's avatar

There refs..you happy. it’s even.

Posted by Itrusteddrrahmani from Nyc by way of A2 on 05/08/13 at 10:35 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Two legit calls. Emmerton has to have control of his stick there

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/08/13 at 10:35 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

WTF? Zebra suckage!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 05/08/13 at 10:35 PM ET

klank's avatar

Getzlaf needed a shave..

Posted by klank from the finest hot tub in Marin on 05/08/13 at 10:35 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

Knocked his hairpiece right off!

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, doing the prospect shuffle.... on 05/08/13 at 10:35 PM ET

MoreShoot's avatar

Holy Shit Getzlaf is Joe Garagiola

Posted by MoreShoot on 05/08/13 at 10:35 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

PAV!  Nice D>

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 05/08/13 at 10:35 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Pavel freaking Datsyuk - -

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 05/08/13 at 10:35 PM ET

Norskirama's avatar

Emmerton with the “Bottletop popper” according to the NBC guys.

Posted by Norskirama from Lincoln, Nebraska on 05/08/13 at 10:35 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

well you knew those penalties were going to come.  a little accidental, but a penalty.  shizzle.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 05/08/13 at 10:36 PM ET

SYF's avatar

I say it again:  Cam Fowler, why are you on that shitacular team???

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 05/08/13 at 10:36 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

Hmmm… puck jacker?

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 05/08/13 at 10:36 PM ET

pgoody's avatar

magic

Posted by pgoody on 05/08/13 at 10:37 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Clear the fuching zone, Wings!!!!!!!!!!!!!1

Posted by SYF from the team that re-signed KFQ and DFC by KFH on 05/08/13 at 10:37 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

that   v l c   link   looks superb on the iphone safari too.  i may never leave the bathroom.

Posted by RWBill from the open bar on The Hasek. on 05/08/13 at 10:37 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Don’t know what game you guys are watching. A stick to the head (even accidental) that knocks a helmet off will and should be called 100% of the time. Mule through that guy into the boards.

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 05/08/13 at 10:37 PM ET

Rumbear's avatar

Puck Jacker?

Let’s help Uncle Jack, off a horse vs
Let’s help Uncle Jack off a horse

Posted by Rumbear from Top O the Hasek, doing the prospect shuffle.... on 05/08/13 at 10:37 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

JAMES!!!

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

Itrusteddrrahmani's avatar

14-3 shots.

Posted by Itrusteddrrahmani from Nyc by way of A2 on 05/08/13 at 10:38 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com