Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Did You Wake Last Night To The Sound of Thunder, Blues Fans? Don’t Fret. Our Serial Killer’s Out

This made me weepy.

I tried, people, I really tried to be a REAL hockey fan. Briefly. If it ain’t the Wings, I just dont give a shit.

 

Posted by dougie on 01/19/13 at 03:12 PM ET

That pretty much sums it up.  Hockey's been on all day, allegedly. They raised their 8th seeded banner in LA before the heavily-favored-to-repeat Kings got smoked by the third-best team in the Central.  They renewed hostilities in Pennsylvania and I'll bet Rosby's been touched exactly once...by Gary Bettman, most likely.

And I tried to watch. Honestly. I wanted to be a good citizen.  But in the end?

I couldn't because--like Dougie--I just don't give a shit about the NHL, about hockey, about the purity of our sport and our precious league. 

Nope. All I really care about is Detroyet is playing hockey again.  The Blues will raise their Central Division yellow sticky in some corporately sponsored arena tonite and the Wings will watch and chortle.  They've been through these before...many, many times.  Division winners.  That's...nice.

The Wings are back, and they're back tonite.  Other hockey happens, I guess. And that's ok.  But it's all static.  It's all boring.  To us, and to millions.  You either love our Wings because baby Jesus decreed it, or you hate them because Detroit's owned your team for decades and months and days. 

St. Louis is a favorite, boy. And the Wings? Oh woe is us.  Like Jenny said earlier, everyone's all sad-face when they talk about us.  "This is the year, sigh..."  Ok.  Bookmark that shit.  Bookmark the naysayers.  

Say it again. St. Louis is a favorite.  That is awesome.  The little kids who could, who tried, who found so much regular season glory last year only to see a standard end to a normal Blues season, Cup-free again.

So raise that banner tonite, little Bitter ones. Raise the division crown high, high, high.  Bellow at it and shake your fists, Blues fans.  What an achievement.

Bullet Bob says not to worry because nothing's more fun to slap around than the Awkward Teenage Blues.  Take them out past the cornfield where the woods got heavy and give them the back of your hand.  Because division titles don't mean jack shit, Sally.  

Big brother's in town. Again.  It's a Live Blog, bitches.

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Comments

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42jeff's avatar

Pavel that beautiful bitch

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/19/13 at 08:20 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

magic 1st shoot

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 01/19/13 at 08:20 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Me likely already.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/19/13 at 08:20 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

Six seconds, that’s what it took to Datsyuk steal a puck.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 01/19/13 at 08:21 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Bac-ass is a goon.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/19/13 at 08:21 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Whiskey please - - not

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/19/13 at 08:22 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Six seconds, that’s what it took to Datsyuk steal a puck.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 01/19/13 at 08:21 PM ET

He won’t get credit for it though…damn scorekeeper probably didn’t even have his pencil in his hand

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/19/13 at 08:22 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

Uncle Mike has a rookie on point during the PP….. yikes.

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 01/19/13 at 08:22 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

testing smitty’s composure early

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 01/19/13 at 08:22 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

At least Brunner shoots the puck

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/19/13 at 08:23 PM ET

calquake's avatar

damn scorekeeper probably didn’t even have his pencil in his hand

Oh he had his pencil in his hand alright but not the one he writes with.

Posted by calquake on 01/19/13 at 08:23 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

Christ stay with it Flip.

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 01/19/13 at 08:24 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

At the very least, Brunner has a beautiful shot.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 01/19/13 at 08:24 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

//sigh// ... i miss nick ...

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 01/19/13 at 08:24 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

Does someone want to cover the slot?

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 01/19/13 at 08:25 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Great PP - -what, 1 shot

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/19/13 at 08:25 PM ET

dougie's avatar

First PP is a zero. Fire Renney.

Posted by dougie on 01/19/13 at 08:25 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

JIMMAH!  Go WINGS!

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 01/19/13 at 08:27 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Hey bitches…don’t look now…

but the RED WINGS are on

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 01/19/13 at 08:28 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

James.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 01/19/13 at 08:28 PM ET

TEMO's avatar

Looks like Jimmy might have to win this game himself.

Posted by TEMO from LANSING, MICHIGAN, U.S.A. on 01/19/13 at 08:28 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

I was waiting for the first JIMMAH!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/19/13 at 08:29 PM ET

TeamDub's avatar

This is terrifying.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 01/19/13 at 08:29 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

125% of Backes hits are at the boards.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 01/19/13 at 08:29 PM ET

TEMO's avatar

fuch

Posted by TEMO from LANSING, MICHIGAN, U.S.A. on 01/19/13 at 08:30 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

damn

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/19/13 at 08:30 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Nice “D” play there - - wait, what?

Nice Q

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/19/13 at 08:30 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 01/19/13 at 08:29 PM ET

Is that avatar a picture from Camp Perry?

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 01/19/13 at 08:30 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

FUCH!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 01/19/13 at 08:30 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

Whoa, incredibly dangerous hit on Mursak. Douchebag.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 01/19/13 at 08:30 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

The Kyle Quincey Show!!

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 01/19/13 at 08:30 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

wonderful ......................

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 01/19/13 at 08:31 PM ET

TeamDub's avatar

bezukov - yes indeedy. 2012 SAFS. Had a blast.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 01/19/13 at 08:31 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

Quincey’s a former Dive, in case anyone forgot.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 01/19/13 at 08:31 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

bezukov - yes indeedy. 2012 SAFS. Had a blast.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 01/19/13 at 08:31 PM ET

Nice.  I used to shoot Nationals every year back in high school.

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 01/19/13 at 08:32 PM ET

TeamDub's avatar

Nice! Good eye, btw.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 01/19/13 at 08:32 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

Fuch you Jobu.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 01/19/13 at 08:33 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

Nice! Good eye, btw.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 01/19/13 at 08:32 PM ET

Lol…  we are marksmen aren’t we?

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 01/19/13 at 08:33 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

Quincey’s a former Dive, in case anyone forgot.

And it only cost us a first-rounder!

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 01/19/13 at 08:34 PM ET

TeamDub's avatar

YOU might be… I shot a paltry 307.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 01/19/13 at 08:35 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com