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Abel to Yzerman

Autumn’s Closing In…And The Ship Must Be Cleansed

I honestly don’t know how any of us have survived.  Wojo pointed this out today and it reminds me just how much I hate the playoffs.

Since 2010, Detroit’s past 10 playoff losses have been by one goal.

That’s just disgusting.  As disgusting as a Wog? No, but close.

At least if we were Pens fans, our team would be getting blown out and the third periods wouldn’t be so painful.

There is no doubt that this one’s big on a Billy Baroo scale.  They’re not winning this thing after going down 1-3 and losing two straight on home ice.  The penalties have to stop. The pucks need to find space behind some Rinne ass and I’ve got to absolutely slaughter some slimey, motherfuching wogs.

Ah yes. For the first time in my Navy career, I’ve got a serious conflict between the playoffs and maritime tradition. 

We cross over into the Raging Main at first light and the cleansing will begin soon after.  More than a thousand Slimey Wogs infest this ship at the moment so it will be a long, torturous process…a process that will prevent me from even following along via the LB comments.  For the first time in more than twenty years, I’ll find out the score of a playoff game well after its completion.

This isn’t a Game 7 but it’s damn close.  Lose this one and we’ll be living by the sword and that’s not where Bullet Bob, King Neptune or Davey By God Jones wants us to be.

It’s a Live Blog, bitches and I’ll either be ravaging my way through the comments afterward or deleting them all in one big bitter fell swoop. Please baby Jesus. Please let it be the former.

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Comments

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Ducksworth's avatar

LGRW!

Posted by Ducksworth from Brownstown, MI on 04/17/12 at 06:34 PM ET

Puck's avatar

Franzen with the Gordie Howe hat trick and Happy Huds with the GWG!

Posted by Puck from San Francisco, CA on 04/17/12 at 06:40 PM ET

Tuba Guy's avatar

Game plan:

Wings need to score first!

Posted by Tuba Guy from Royal Oak, MI on 04/17/12 at 06:40 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

Just win baby.
Hopefully my kiddo comes home with a trophy and I come home to a Wings win.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 04/17/12 at 06:46 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Just get the g-ddamn win, Wings.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 04/17/12 at 06:46 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

Gameplan for the Wings: care. just, care.

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 04/17/12 at 06:46 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

If it’s wog day, I think that means you’re on your way home, Master Chief, which is really good news. 

LET’S GO RED WINGS!!! BEAT BUBBA!!!

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 04/17/12 at 06:50 PM ET

MsRedWinger's avatar

Win.  Just win. 

Hang in there, Chief.

LET’S GO RED WINGS !!!!!

Posted by MsRedWinger from Flori-duh on 04/17/12 at 06:51 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Score first, what is it?
Im at Target filling a prescription for 800 Mg ibuprofen, because that’s just how much it would suck to lose 2 straight at home to the Wannabes.
Then I’m spreading some fertilizer on the grass ahead of the impending rain, then im starting to drink, well ahead of face off.

LGRW, Bitches.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/17/12 at 06:52 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

Then I’m spreading some fertilizer on the grass ahead of the impending rain, then im starting to drink, well ahead of face off.

LGRW, Bitches.

Posted by RWBill from the Land of 12 in 12. on 04/17/12 at 05:52 PM ET


Hopefully the Wings don’t spread any more fertilizer at the Joe.

Sorry, low-hanging fruit and all.

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 04/17/12 at 06:55 PM ET

detroitredwings's avatar

FSD feed, please?

Posted by detroitredwings on 04/17/12 at 07:06 PM ET

dougie's avatar

1000 less wogs to encounter might be worth the sacrifice,Chief.
Here’s hoping you have another 18-22 or so LB’s to kick off this seaon

Posted by dougie on 04/17/12 at 07:22 PM ET

FranzensMouthguard's avatar

LETS GO WINGS!

Posted by FranzensMouthguard from Chicago, IL on 04/17/12 at 07:23 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Just watched my little girl score her first basket…surely an omen.

LGRW!!

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 04/17/12 at 07:28 PM ET

YYZerman's avatar

Time to take over like they can. Just please no Quincy. Let’s Go Red Wings

Posted by YYZerman from Detroit, Michigan on 04/17/12 at 07:40 PM ET

statelouis26's avatar

Just please no Quincy.
Posted by YYZerman from Detroit, Michigan on 04/17/12 at 06:40 PM ET

This is the first time I’ve seen some intelligence with regard to this move by the Wings in a while.  Kudos to you my friend.

LGRW.

Posted by statelouis26 from Detroit, MI on 04/17/12 at 07:44 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

It’s a Live Blog, bitches

Evenin’ Bitches. Ahoy, hoy, Master Chief. Here’s to you finding your way home safely and quickly.

Time to right the wrongs and WIN TONITE! The Wings owe us, big time.

Not just the 19, but, every single Detroit Red Wing’s fan on the planet.

Let’s Roll!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/17/12 at 07:51 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Good luck call? I’m waiting.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/17/12 at 07:52 PM ET

Guilherme's avatar

Gameplan for the Wings: care. just, care.

If it doesn’t work, CARE HARDER.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/17/12 at 07:54 PM ET

Gabriel's avatar

For the first time in more than twenty years, I’ll find out the score of a playoff game well after its completion.

Chief, with all due respect, you have a thousand wogs standing around waiting their turn. Surely that’s more than enough to form a bucket brigade of updates from the nearest source of game stats?

Posted by Gabriel from San Diego, CA on 04/17/12 at 07:57 PM ET

Since71's avatar

Gameplan for the Wings: care. just, care.

If it doesn’t work, CARE HARDER.

Posted by Guilherme from Brazsil on 04/17/12 at 06:54 PM ET

And if THIS doesn’t work, put a bag of golf clubs on the bench next to Franzen.

Posted by Since71 from Bucharest, Romania on 04/17/12 at 07:57 PM ET

Hippy Dave's avatar

LGRW!

Posted by Hippy Dave from Portland by way of Detroit on 04/17/12 at 08:03 PM ET

bezukov's avatar

I have zero enthusiasm for you guys right now.  Need beer.

Posted by bezukov from the kids are alright. on 04/17/12 at 08:05 PM ET

mrfluffy's avatar

It’s a long way to the top if yout want to roc…er…if you want to win the Cup.


Now where’s me bagpipes?

Posted by mrfluffy from A wide spot on I-90 in Montana on 04/17/12 at 08:09 PM ET

dougie's avatar

bezukov, go straight to the hard stuff. 2 hours of serious beer drinking, and I am not in the same zip code with enthusiasm.

Posted by dougie on 04/17/12 at 08:12 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Let’s do this shit.

Working through the second half of that bottle of rotgut.  Give me strength to get through the rest because I think it’s eating through the glass of my decanter.

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 04/17/12 at 08:15 PM ET

dougie's avatar

And I am debunking the “low expectations” theory. Red Wings fans and low expectations are an oxymoron.
They cannot exist in the same space.

LGRW!

Posted by dougie on 04/17/12 at 08:17 PM ET

Behind_Enemy_Lines's avatar

LGRW
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4VX3_iT2z3Y

Posted by Behind_Enemy_Lines from Evanston,IL on 04/17/12 at 08:18 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Holy crap Roenik is a putz

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 04/17/12 at 08:19 PM ET

The Hurricane's avatar

Who the hell puked in the caboose already? The Hasek is ripe with postseason bacteria already! LGMFRW!

Posted by The Hurricane on 04/17/12 at 08:20 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

And I am debunking the “low expectations” theory. Red Wings fans and low expectations are an oxymoron.
They cannot exist in the same space.

LGRW!

Posted by dougie on 04/17/12 at 07:17 PM ET

Were that it was true.

But, alas, ‘tis not.

Co-workers, and friends who are casual hockey fans, usually enjoy this time of year, as they watch me stress and fret over the Wings’ fortunes in the post-season.

“What is wrong with ye?”, they ask now. “Low expectations, matey”, is me forlorn reply.

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 04/17/12 at 08:20 PM ET

RWBill's avatar


Working through the second half of that bottle of rotgut.

Posted by 42jeff from Minot, North Dakota on 04/17/12 at 07:15 PM ET

Military Special Whisky?

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/17/12 at 08:20 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Military Special Whisky?

Posted by RWBill from the Land of 12 in 12. on 04/17/12 at 07:20 PM ET

Hells yes.  I considered pouring it in the car, but thought better of it.  A dude’s gotta get to work.  And it’s blasphemous to pour it out….a guy’s gotta do what a guy’s gotta do.

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 04/17/12 at 08:22 PM ET

Avatar

“A creative Red Wings fan made it “NyQuist,” like a certain cold medicine with a similar name in an edited picture that made its way around fan circles online. Next to a bottle labeled “NyQuist Cold and Flu” is the slogan: “The Swedish skating, passing, dekeing, dangling, scoring, best production you ever got from a rookie in a long time … player.” www(dot)nhl(dot)com/ice/news.htm?id=628309

Brian Hedger has been checking this LB.

LGRW!

Posted by Alex on 04/17/12 at 08:22 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Give me strength to get through the rest because I think it’s eating through the glass of my decanter.

Posted by 42jeff from Minot, North Dakota on 04/17/12 at 07:15 PM ET

Now that is some high class liquoring.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/17/12 at 08:24 PM ET

Puck's avatar

Game plan:

Wings need to score first!

Posted by Tuba Guy from Royal Oak, MI on 04/17/12 at 05:40 PM ET

And 2nd, 3rd, 4th and 5th early. Rinne needs to be chased or at least ridden hard and put away wet.

Posted by Puck from San Francisco, CA on 04/17/12 at 08:25 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

Water for me tonight. I drank eleven Blue Moons for Sunday’s context, and I’ll be damn if that beer isn’t so heavy it kept me right in bed Monday morning. Almost like I was stapled to the mattress.

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 04/17/12 at 08:26 PM ET

dougie's avatar

Mike Keenan, a bigger douche than Don Cherry.

Posted by dougie on 04/17/12 at 08:26 PM ET

42jeff's avatar

Now that is some high class liquoring.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 04/17/12 at 07:24 PM ET

Only the best for a Red Wings playoff game!

Posted by 42jeff from The greater Howard City, MI metroplex on 04/17/12 at 08:26 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Posted by Alex on 04/17/12 at 07:22 PM ET

Can’t use just post a link, why always the (dot)s ?

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 04/17/12 at 08:26 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com