Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

Here’s To Malik. And Thid? You Can Just Go Ahead And Suck It

If any of you donated a single cent to George’s trek to TC, and wonder where the money went?  Read this.  It’s a great final chapter to one of the best displays of hockey blogging/writing you’ll ever see.

Every report from George out of camp was an amazing collection of insider knowledge, hockey genius and delicious Wing fan bias.  Perfection.  He brought a huge amount of class to A2Y and turned this place into something reputable for 11 days.  And so, as I thank Malik for that, I’ll also say this…

Thid Rosby does suck, can suck and will continue to suck it long and hard.  And that’s just the law.  The Wings stroll into The House That Gary Built tonight, a meaningless game, an exhibition for god’s sake, just a little shinny that will happen to take place between two teams who despise one another.

The Pens hate the Wings because of one guy, Hank Zetterberg.  He’s owned them in every matchup, and he’s in their collective heads. Why?  Because their “captain” soils his thong at the mere thought of 40 hounding him, laughing at him, stifling him. No one in the league plays Rosby better because no one has the tenacity to defend him as well as Zetterberg, and no one has the calm demeanor that allows him to view it as a game of washer toss with a PBR rather than an exercise in stress.  Zetterberg enjoys making him sad and Rosby knows it better than anyone.

The Wings despise Pittsburgh because of everything that team represents.  While the Wing organ-I-zation worked hard over two decades to build this Dynasty, the Pens were handed gifted players due to utter (and perhaps not so coincidental) failure on the ice.  They were propped up by the league, financially and commercially, and then shoved past the gag reflex of the hockey world again and again until Gary’s creative Finals scheduling, horrific officiating and a spate of Detroit injuries led to a Cup calling that one-trick town home for ten months until Thid’s “leadership” allowed the thing to walk away without a fight.  And all of that offends a team hell-bent on tradition and sustained excellence.

The Pens don’t like the arrogance that surrounds the Wings.  They feel it’s unearned and it burns them that a team two full seasons removed from its last Cup can be so maddeningly confident about their chances of regaining what belongs in Detroit.  Pens fans, in particular, just don’t like that very much.  And here’s the thing, which is so very interesting.  The Wings and Wing fans share something very similar in that we all take great joy in this rash, this burning that penicillin can’t solve, this frigging pain that Pens fans get when they pee and think of the Red Wings all at once.  Deep down inside, the Pens team knows this Detroit team is better.  And way deep down inside, Pens fans know it too.  And, oh how it hurts. 

So, it’s an exhibition, a pre-season game and nothing more than sixty minutes to kick some tires. 

But don’t you think there might be a little discussion in the Wing room about how fun it might be to kick some Pen ass in their new building, in front of a few thousand “fans” and Gary Bettman who will be watching on satellite wearing a diaper and an “87” half shirt?

Good job George.  Great job actually.  Now let’s head back to the gutter where we belong, eh?

Live blog tonight.  As far as I know, the game’s not on tv.  But one of you smart bastards will find the feed, and there’s always radio one way or another.  I’ll be braving Coronado traffic through the first period but we’ll get the thing kicked off 30 minutes prior to game time with some Motherfauxing Seger.

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Comments

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Stilly's avatar

@The Hurricane

Who do you think I am?  Alex Ovechkin?  He’s got passion coming out of his ears.

Posted by Stilly on 09/22/10 at 04:40 PM ET

TeamDub's avatar

Finally, hockey.

I had higher hopes for the Lions, but they seem completely hell-bent on finding new, creative ways to lose games.

Psyched to see how this year’s roster shakes out, and curious to see how Salei performs. Modano needs more shoot.

Yeah, regarding Lebda… I’m pretty sure he’s exactly the missing piece the Leafs needed. Ahem. What a waste of decent wheels.

Looking forward to seeing some lid-knocking and clucking outta Hudler - he’s a strange little guy.

And voox, you win. Not only will I never post “homoerotic” Photoshops (Homer’s head on The Hedgehog) again, you’ve managed to drain every ounce of entertainment out of the process for me with your holier-than-thou diktats, so I just won’t bother with anything.

Well, at least you were a complete dick in person.

And that’s the last I’ll have to say about that.

Welcome back Chief, excellent work G.M.

Go ‘Wings.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 09/22/10 at 04:54 PM ET

Avatar

Oh, I get how it is.  This blog is marketed and featured on Kukla’s Korner, a general hockey site with information from all of hockeydom, but others who do not share your views are not welcome to comment.  We can just browse and stand back in awe for your incredible way with words and indepth hockey knowledge.

Jokes.

Posted by VAHockeyFan on 09/22/10 at 04:56 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

others who do not share your views are not welcome to comment.

No, you’re more than welcome to comment.  We’ve had quite a wealth of non-wings fans around here that get along quite nicely.  Just know that as a non-Wings fan, you’re going to take crap for it, especially if you fly in here talking shit.

I mean, do you have anything to discuss other than Wings fans?  I’d love to discuss hockey with you, but you seem a bit too enamored with discussing how Pensblog and Abel to Yzerman compare.

Don’t pretend like you got tricked in here by Kuklaskorner either; that’s a bit insulting to your intelligence and it leaves less of that for us to do.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 09/22/10 at 05:03 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

double of Hacienda Dona Engracia Anejo Tequila and f*ck the lime-and-salt stunt; no one in Puerto Vallarta, Mexico

Right on. In Cancun this summer I fell in love with Don Julio. Salt & lime has no place near good tequila.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 09/22/10 at 05:05 PM ET

FranzensMouthguard's avatar

Salt & lime has no place near good tequila.

Explain that to my wife in March.

Posted by FranzensMouthguard from Chicago, IL on 09/22/10 at 05:08 PM ET

Nati's avatar

Holy shit. Where did the summer go??

I feel like I have missed so much and all of the sudden preseason starts tonight and everyone is ready for it.

I don’t know how much I will be around this season. Full time student and two part time jobs limits my sanity and time. I currently smell strongly of sushi and stir fry and I am a little pissed off that there isnt a way to watch the game tonight.

Although, my life seems a little more complete again because hockey is in it again.

LGRW!

Posted by Nati from school or work, either would apply on 09/22/10 at 05:17 PM ET

Osrt's avatar

Go Pens!

Posted by Hank1974

MmmmmKay. (Seriously though, I thought you were a Wings fan? You are right? And just being considerate for this pop the new arena’s cherry, or at least foreplay it a little, moment?)

Posted by J.J. from Kansas

wow. destroyed.

Posted by Osrt on 09/22/10 at 05:19 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Posted by MOWingsfan19 on 09/22/10 at 04:05 PM ET

Did you really?  I just got back from a Royal Caribbean cruise to the Mexican Riviera (Cabo San Lucas, Mazatlan, and Puerto Vallarta) two weeks ago and I’m already missing it.

Posted by FranzensMouthguard from Chicago, IL on 09/22/10 at 04:08 PM ET

It’s like pouring A1 steak sauce on a fine Porterhouse steak.  Just not cool, man.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 09/22/10 at 05:23 PM ET

Hank1974's avatar

MmmmmKay. (Seriously though, I thought you were a Wings fan? You are right? And just being considerate for this pop the new arena’s cherry, or at least foreplay it a little, moment?)

Haha. Yup, I’m a huge Wings fan.

But it’s always fun to see the ladies in these threads get their panties in a bunch when you compliment Sid or the Pens.

I thought I heard Osrt’s ovaries explode when he read my post. wink

P.S. I do like Crosby though. I’m not a fan of some of the crying he does, but I appreciate his skills on the ice. Gretzky and Lemieux were giant whiners too but man were they fun to watch.

Posted by Hank1974 on 09/22/10 at 05:23 PM ET

VooX's avatar

And voox, you win. Not only will I never post “homoerotic” Photoshops (Homer’s head on The Hedgehog) again, you’ve managed to drain every ounce of entertainment out of the process for me with your holier-than-thou diktats, so I just won’t bother with anything.

Well, at least you were a complete dick in person.

And that’s the last I’ll have to say about that.

Posted by TeamDub from The gratch. on 09/22/10 at 03:54 PM ET

Ouch.  Although I don’t remember meeting you, I’m glad I didn’t disappoint on the cock-o-meter.

Posted by VooX from Behind the Bar in the Hasek Club Car on 09/22/10 at 05:41 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

UGH

... and the pain begins.

First Drapes, then this.

//sigh//

“Jiri Hudler has a bruised left foot and won’t play in tonight’s preseason opener at Pittsburgh. ... Ilari Filppula will replace him in the lineup tonight, taking his spot on a line with Mike Modano and Dan Cleary.”

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 09/22/10 at 05:53 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

I do not share much enthusiasm for an early match in the tryout season, and let’s not forget that’s exactly what it is, that involves 50 % of the Wings’ players competing for spots.

The two best two-way forwards in the NHL will not even be playing tonight.

It means we are indeed one giant step closer to October finally, but I don’t really have that much interest in listening to radio or even watching any live video of the Unibomber trying to figure out how to rekindle the playoff magic now with Filppula and Franzen instead of Z and Mule, or the awkward lost shifts of Modano with Cleary and Huds.

As I said a couple of weeks ago, or was it months, those penciled in lines one-two-three we looked at since the Modano signing are notional only and subject to being broken apart like that ugly vase you made for mother in 7th grade Art class.  The Flying Circus is the most sancrosanct but even that doesn’t have permanent immunity. 

I can’t wait to see what the initial product is October 8, but between now and then will be much like making sausage, it’s better not to watch.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 09/22/10 at 05:55 PM ET

Crater's avatar

That’s a shame.  While watching the Red vs. White game yesterday was awesome, it wasn’t anything like watching the Wings vs. another team.  I really wish Pittsburgh media would broadcast this game.  I’m sure the Penguin fans would love to see it too.

Posted by Forlorn in VA on 09/22/10 at 11:50 AM ET

Would take way too long for the Pittsburg media to explain to the city that Hockey has a pre-season and that the reason it is a close game is due to the lack the Red Wings top lines/Power Play.

Posted by Crater from SoCal on 09/22/10 at 05:55 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

And Thid? You Can Just Go Ahead And Suck It

Never quite realized how much I missed our Chief until I read that.

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 09/22/10 at 05:55 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

“Jiri Hudler has a bruised left foot and won’t play in tonight’s preseason opener at Pittsburgh. ... Ilari Filppula will replace him in the lineup tonight, taking his spot on a line with Mike Modano and Dan Cleary.”
Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 09/22/10 at 04:53 PM ET

Even more reason, thanks Stonehands, ya bastard!  See?  Sausage in the making!

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 09/22/10 at 05:59 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Posted by RWBill from the Capital of the Confederacy. on 09/22/10 at 04:59 PM ET

~ sorry, I’m just the messenger ~

Kinda makes me feel ... queezy, though.
Bad memories from last year and all ...

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 09/22/10 at 06:06 PM ET

SYF's avatar

Re:  Hudler’s injury.

Gack.  That sucks but he’s got two weeks to rehab.

Agree, Bill.  I’m not putting much stock into a preseason game neither.

Posted by SYF from The Revenge of Johnny E on 09/22/10 at 06:11 PM ET

Avatar

J.J. - You’d be dead wrong.  I frequently go to Kuklas Korner for general hockey news.  I live in No. VA, and, God knows, the only hockey news we get here begins and ends with the Capitals and is fed through the Leonsis koolaide-drinking media.  Hell I check into this blog when I see it because 90% of the time there is intelligent hockey talk.  I just don’t get the ramping up with all the Rosby and Pens bandwagon sh** for a meaningless preseason game.  It’s old and worn IMHO, and should only be brought out in the heat of the war in the playoffs when hate is at its high level.  From my perspective, I respect the hell out of the Wings and can’t get to the depths of that primal hate until then.

Here’s hoping for that rubber match in June 2011.  Now just drop that GD puck so we can dispense with this nonsense…

Posted by VAHockeyFan on 09/22/10 at 06:14 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

Great post, Tony…and it would have been somewhat effective had we not won the Cup on YOUR ice before you won it on our ice.


Sheesh, the season is starting off rough, Tony. That was sad.

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 09/22/10 at 06:17 PM ET

Osrt's avatar

I thought I heard Osrt’s ovaries explode when he read my post. wink

P.S. I do like Crosby though. I’m not a fan of some of the crying he does, but I appreciate his skills on the ice. Gretzky and Lemieux were giant whiners too but man were they fun to watch.

Posted by Hank1974

Thanks man. Now I don’t have to worry about the pill and can just sit on my balls.

Yea, like his predecessors, I admire the skill but hate the douchiness.

Posted by Osrt on 09/22/10 at 06:18 PM ET

Red Winger's avatar

I get the toungue and cheek humor, but it just gets old, especially when you take yourself this seriously for just a pre-season, meaningless game.

Posted by VAHockeyFan on 09/22/10 at 12:36 PM ET

Meaningless game in Pittsburgh = any game before February (aka end of football season)

Posted by Red Winger from Sault Ste Marie on 09/22/10 at 06:30 PM ET

J.J. from Kansas's avatar

I just don’t get the ramping up with all the Rosby and Pens bandwagon sh** for a meaningless preseason game.  It’s old and worn IMHO, and should only be brought out in the heat of the war in the playoffs when hate is at its high level.  From my perspective, I respect the hell out of the Wings and can’t get to the depths of that primal hate until then.

Well, sir, that is where you and I differ.  I appreciate a good Chief post at the start of preseason as the perfect time to ramp it up for the hockey season.  I’d have blue, Osrt-sized balls if I waited until the postseason for Chief’s brand of writing. 

Hell, I was the de-facto Pens apologist until Hank1974 went nuts today and I still love that I can start waking up the primal hate in late September.  I let it sleep through July and August.  Hibernation time’s over.

Posted by J.J. from Kansas on 09/22/10 at 06:41 PM ET

CaptNorris5's avatar

DAMN YOU LARY AURIE!

Apparently the curse continues.

Seriously, can we just put that number in the rafters already?

Posted by CaptNorris5 from The Winged Wheel, stuck in Chicago on 09/22/10 at 06:44 PM ET

Behind_Enemy_Lines's avatar

I am glad my kids don’t have to grow up in Pitt. and have Rosby and Ben Rothlesburger as their role models. I would much rather have them growing up with say Probert and Charles Rodgers as their heroes. A pot smokin, powder sniffin, ass kicker would be better than a sack juggling, sissy,rapist. Both would spend the same amout of time in jail, but I have a feeling the later would have an easier time depending on how well honed his ball juggling skills are.

Posted by Behind_Enemy_Lines from Evanston,IL on 09/22/10 at 06:55 PM ET

cowboycoffee's avatar

right back in the gutter

Posted by cowboycoffee from San Francisco, CA on 09/22/10 at 06:56 PM ET

cowboycoffee's avatar

i actually prefer you to iwoCPO, Voox. You’re posts here and on HF actually have some substance to them, most of the time. IWOcpo just talks smack. It really get’s boring after a while. Of course, i understand how it works. A2Y talks garbage, then Pensblog talks garbage back and Paint It Black & Fear The Fin try to keep up. Everybody gets hits on their Shake ‘N Bake ad links and the powers-that-be are happy. Repeat ad-nauseum.

It’s hard enough being a die-hard Wings fan 2500 miles from Detroit. The last thing I want is to deal with agro Sharks, Kings, Ducks, Yotes fans when I’m in a bar or going to the game because of this.

I’ve been coming here way longer than my join date and have read Malik every day for several years. I stopped coming here because Malik is so good at what he does. He keeps the smack-talk to a minimum and the useful information to a maximum. His unassuming style is good reading.

Lastly, I’ve worked in internet-related industries since the early 90’s. I’ve been a huge Wings fan my whole life, so, naturally, i talk with a lot of people about hockey blogs. I’ve talked to many internet-savvy Wings fans that feel the whole ‘19’ thing is pretty inclusive and annoying. I see how you’ve now spun it to mean more than 19 individuals it originally was, but it still makes just as many Wings fans feel alienated as it does other teams fan’s feel not-harcore enough.

and finally, i’ll be hanging around here again. i promise to be fair in my comments.

Posted by cowboycoffee from San Francisco, CA on 09/22/10 at 08:40 PM ET

cowboycoffee's avatar

Holy Crap! You pulled your comment calling me out, Voox. Why?

Posted by cowboycoffee from San Francisco, CA on 09/22/10 at 08:41 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

I’ve talked to many internet-savvy Wings fans that feel the whole ‘19’ thing is pretty inclusive and annoying. I see how you’ve now spun it to mean more than 19 individuals it originally was, but it still makes just as many Wings fans feel alienated as it does other teams fan’s feel not-harcore enough.

Jesus…are you going to be ok?  I’m trying to think of the hundreds of things I’m going to be doing tonight instead of defending the “19” concept to you.  Have a good one.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 09/22/10 at 08:50 PM ET

cowboycoffee's avatar

didn’t ask you to, chief. just saying what people have said to me.

i think the rest of my comment was what was really important, but that’s a little out of place without Voox’s unabashed declaration of arseholeness and calling me out.

Posted by cowboycoffee from San Francisco, CA on 09/22/10 at 09:03 PM ET

Seaner in Sharkville's avatar

It’s hard enough being a die-hard Wings fan 2500 miles from Detroit. The last thing I want is to deal with agro Sharks, Kings, Ducks, Yotes fans when I’m in a bar or going to the game because of this.

From my experience Sharks fans are generally dicks without reading A2Y. I think it comes from years of underachieving in the playoffs. I don’t know about Kings, Ducks, or Yotes fans, as I have never met any.  wink

Posted by Seaner in Sharkville from Silicon Valley on 09/22/10 at 09:22 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

didn’t ask you to, chief. just saying what people have said to me.

It’s actually an interesting discussion. I don’t like the idea of offending fellow Wing fans but if it happens, it does.  The “19” thing seems to piss off everyone who feels they aren’t a part of it and most people don’t realize that it applies to pretty much any Wing fan out there.  Kinda cool that we’re even talking about it, really.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 09/22/10 at 09:53 PM ET

Behind_Enemy_Lines's avatar

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 09/22/10 at 08:53 PM ET

+19

Posted by Behind_Enemy_Lines from Evanston,IL on 09/23/10 at 01:18 AM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com