Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

All Routes To Mankato Are Closed: There’s A Killer On The Road

"Little House" never scared me. Sure, when Mary went blind and that little skank Nellie started tricking on her 16th birthday? Disturbing.  But never scared, really.  It wasn't a scary show. It was family. It was Pa battling a few broken ribs to protect the clan from savage rats. It was Mr. Angel, wasted on corn whiskey but lovable. It was Albert with the lisp stoned to the bejesus belt on morphine up in the hay loft.

The Ingalls sisters stayed grounded.  And we loved them for it.  But they never had to deal with the likes of a really bad man. 

Well, tonite they do. Tonite, Little House is back in a stirring return on FS-Detroit, brought to you by the Bernstein Law Firm and that idiotic sports store who claims "the strike is over."  And don't you think for a second it's going to be all giggles and light. No.

The Ingalls sisters leave the innocence of Walnut Grove and travel east to the mean streets of Detroit. It's there that Mary and Laura, together again because they each have agents now, find out that the world can be much more cruel and sinister than just the leering gaze of Nels Olsen at the tail end of a barn dance.  Tonite, it's the Ingalls sisters battling a serial killer, a sociopath, a wacked out toothless bearded bastard who wreaked havoc in the Rockies ten years ago and hasn't stopped killing since.

Little Half Pint and her blind dimwitted sister Mary take to the ice in Detroit tonite, a place they could have called home had they not elected to live together in harmony and song for the rest of their Cup-less lives.

Bring it ladies.  Our Serial Killer awaits and his brain is squirming like a frigging toad.  It's a live blog, bitches.

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Comments

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calquake's avatar

Is that the first time Gator has been on top?

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 01/25/13 at 09:51 PM ET

His girlfriend doesn’t refer to him as the “Missionary Man” for nothing you know.

Posted by calquake on 01/25/13 at 09:53 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

Missed it by that much
Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Looking for a “D” man on 01/25/13 at 09:50 PM ET

-

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 01/25/13 at 09:54 PM ET

NIVO's avatar

damn bad luick garbage $!$%@@%^@$@%$#@$@

Posted by NIVO from underpants gnome village on 01/25/13 at 09:55 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

Boooooo

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 01/25/13 at 09:55 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Bad luck on that one

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/25/13 at 09:55 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

Rofl Cal.

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 01/25/13 at 09:56 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Douche-boi with lucky ass fluke.  Fuch it. there is no justice.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 01/25/13 at 09:56 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Best game so far this season.  Although that’s not saying much.

Posted by calquake on 01/25/13 at 09:57 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

OMG Herm you are the luckiest man on the planet

first period was atrocious.  so was most of the second.  we were all putting together plans for a mass suicide into the Detroit River.  seriously.  it was horrid.  then Brunner.

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 01/25/13 at 09:47 PM ET

That about sums it up

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/25/13 at 09:57 PM ET

NIVO's avatar

bs call, both guys playing for position and puck. worst call ever

Posted by NIVO from underpants gnome village on 01/25/13 at 09:59 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

Good Job.. Buckets.

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 01/25/13 at 09:59 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Stat of the night, well, one of many unexpected,  Hits,  Detroit 17-4.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 01/25/13 at 09:59 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

One goal game, coming up

dumbass Buckets

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/25/13 at 09:59 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

did golden ticket ‘ust say ‘uck you to da ref?

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/25/13 at 09:59 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

What a dumb penalty.
BOHICA.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 01/25/13 at 09:59 PM ET

sjketcheson's avatar

That was not Buckets, that was pure unadulterated Ref fail

Posted by sjketcheson from the floor of the Hasek on 01/25/13 at 10:00 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Weak ass penalty call there.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 01/25/13 at 10:00 PM ET

NIVO's avatar

did the midget call down and tell em to get minny mild back in the game?

Posted by NIVO from underpants gnome village on 01/25/13 at 10:00 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Jfc when as a red wing team commited so many penalties?  8 the other night.

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 01/25/13 at 10:00 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

Set of Douchy.

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 01/25/13 at 10:01 PM ET

cigar_nurse's avatar

WTF Cleary. Offensives zone hold.

Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 01/25/13 at 10:02 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Pavel has a magic stick

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/25/13 at 10:02 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

Um… actually a solid kill.

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 01/25/13 at 10:02 PM ET

NIVO's avatar

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww finish FINISH!

Posted by NIVO from underpants gnome village on 01/25/13 at 10:03 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Stone hands

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/25/13 at 10:03 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Stone hands

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Looking for a “D” man on 01/25/13 at 10:03 PM ET

yes? ... what?

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 01/25/13 at 10:03 PM ET

NIVO's avatar

is it just me? or does Miller look like he’s laboring out there?

Posted by NIVO from underpants gnome village on 01/25/13 at 10:04 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

So far Tootoo is NOT leading the team in dumb ass penalties!

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 01/25/13 at 10:04 PM ET

Avatar

Love The Doors reference. Just had to say that.  Wings looking good tonight. Franzen needs to at least look like he wants the puck back when he loses it though.

Posted by spl1ph on 01/25/13 at 10:04 PM ET

cigar_nurse's avatar

Nice grind line shift.

Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 01/25/13 at 10:06 PM ET

RorSchach's avatar

Boom Boom Line. I like it.

Posted by RorSchach from Datsberg on 01/25/13 at 10:07 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Will Bertuzzi get the en hat trick?

Posted by RWBill from Brush Street cruising with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 01/25/13 at 10:07 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Love Brunner’s compete level.

Posted by calquake on 01/25/13 at 10:07 PM ET

MOWingsfan19's avatar

What a difference a few goals makes eh?

Posted by MOWingsfan19 from I really like our team on 01/25/13 at 10:07 PM ET

PaulinMiamiBeach's avatar

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww finish FINISH!

that’s what she said

Posted by PaulinMiamiBeach on 01/25/13 at 10:07 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Its like Brunners goal just opened the flood gates.

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 01/25/13 at 10:08 PM ET

NIVO's avatar

bring on da hawks, down with Kane toad!

Posted by NIVO from underpants gnome village on 01/25/13 at 10:08 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

missed that song.

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 01/25/13 at 10:10 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Same old sorry ass Wild!!!!

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 01/25/13 at 10:11 PM ET

IwoCPO's avatar

Ha.  Suck it Ingalls sisters.

Posted by IwoCPO from Sunny San Diego, bitches on 01/25/13 at 10:12 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com