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Abel to Yzerman

All Is Well…Gary Says The Playoffs Start Tonite

In a stunning decision from the NHL front office in Pittsburgh, midget commissioner Gary.Ass Bettman announced just moments ago that Sidney Crosby has been named Cosmopolitan Magazine's Man of the Decade and that the NHL playoffs will start this evening. First round matchups will be announced thirty minutes before game times.  If any visiting team can't make it to their scheduled game, that round will be postponed until the new glossy Crosby posters have been completely reviewed in Bettman's private office, with soft lighting.

None of that is true, except the part about Bettman being a midget, the Cosmo award for Rosby, the poster thing and the soft lighting.  So, the playoffs aren't really starting tonite.

But if they were?

The Wings would be playing Vancouver.  Is that some sort of crazy-ass coincidence or what?

Nuts.

Two of them. If Luongo has those, he's in tonite because of the violation Detroit levied upon him the last time out.

Whatever. The Wings, because they did last night, can score on the power play, win on the road and profess allegiance to their coach.

It's a late one and I'm guessing, maybe, two of you are sober. Have at it, by god.  It's a Live Blog, bitches. 

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Comments

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stonehands-78's avatar

BUCKETS

golden ticket ... yesh LUUUUUUUUUUUUU

4-1

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/16/13 at 11:15 PM ET

Avatar

loooooooou

Posted by sherwood on 03/16/13 at 11:15 PM ET

Bent's avatar

Can the wings play Vancouver every game?

Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 03/16/13 at 11:15 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Wow.  DET are en fuego

Yeah, and they’re playing pretty good too.

Posted by calquake on 03/16/13 at 11:15 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Lol, Pav has 1 on 3 and gets the puck held deep in their end.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/16/13 at 11:15 PM ET

Hootinani's avatar

Lou has let Cleary and Abs score this game…..he should walk off the ice and retire right now.

Posted by Valek on 03/17/13 at 12:14 AM ET

I think most Nuck fans would agree with you

Posted by Hootinani on 03/16/13 at 11:15 PM ET

NIVO's avatar

well 2pts from tonight will keep us in 5th no matter what happens in the LA/SJ game. Good news!

Posted by NIVO from underpants gnome village on 03/16/13 at 11:16 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

Lou has let Cleary and Abs score this game…..he should walk off the ice and retire right now.

Posted by Valek on 03/17/13 at 12:14 AM ET

LOL

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 03/16/13 at 11:16 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Blind squirrel !!!


LUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU !!!!

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/16/13 at 11:17 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Apparently the key to the Red Wing offense is….


Luongo?

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 03/16/13 at 11:17 PM ET

Riviera's avatar

Can the wings play Vancouver every game?

Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 03/17/13 at 12:15 AM ET

Or at least just play Luuuu every game.

Posted by Riviera from Phoenix on 03/16/13 at 11:17 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Lou has let Cleary and Abs score this game…..he should walk off the ice and retire right now.

Posted by Valek on 03/17/13 at 12:14 AM ET

Right because his 231 wins are equal to Osgood’s 400.

Posted by calquake on 03/16/13 at 11:17 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Mouths of Whores Shut from here on in.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/16/13 at 11:18 PM ET

Avatar

Weak

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 03/16/13 at 11:18 PM ET

calquake's avatar

zipper

Posted by calquake on 03/16/13 at 11:18 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

01:20 Henrik Zetterberg (8) Slap Shot - Assists: V. Filppula (7) & N. Kronwall (17)

05:57 Daniel Cleary (6) Snap Shot - Assists: J. Andersson (4) & D. Brunner (10)

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/16/13 at 11:19 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Tootoo loses a pint of blood on the high stick. No call. Some Sedim gets nothing done to him. 2 minutes.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/16/13 at 11:19 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Mouths of Whores Shut from here on in.
Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/17/13 at 12:18 AM ET

Someone else just got back from Vegas.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/16/13 at 11:20 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Eaves, nice play to out-work his man along the wall there.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 03/16/13 at 11:20 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

13:00 left, shutting whore mouth now.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/16/13 at 11:21 PM ET

calquake's avatar

How can this be the team that loses 2 to Columbus and then to Cal-Gary?

Posted by calquake on 03/16/13 at 11:21 PM ET

CaptainDennisPolonich's avatar

How can this be the team that loses 2 to Columbus and then to Cal-Gary?
Posted by calquake on 03/17/13 at 12:21 AM ET

Your whore mouth is partially open

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from The Land of Fake Boobs and Real Nuts on 03/16/13 at 11:22 PM ET

Riviera's avatar

Well, let’s don’t let him walk the fuch in.

Posted by Riviera from Phoenix on 03/16/13 at 11:23 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Your whore mouth is partially open

Posted by CaptainDennisPolonich from Warm and sunny SoCal on 03/17/13 at 12:22 AM ET

I only work part time.

Posted by calquake on 03/16/13 at 11:23 PM ET

Little Redhead's avatar

JIMMAH

Posted by Little Redhead from the Engineer's chair on 03/16/13 at 11:23 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

VAN #27 PP??

Bizarre year, but they looked like it there.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/16/13 at 11:24 PM ET

Hootinani's avatar

Smiths had a good 2nd half of the game

Posted by Hootinani on 03/16/13 at 11:24 PM ET

MoreShoot's avatar

2 is the real deal

Posted by MoreShoot on 03/16/13 at 11:24 PM ET

Bent's avatar

Another PK.

Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 03/16/13 at 11:25 PM ET

Riviera's avatar

If I see another Wing blow a tire for no reason, I’m calling shenanigans.

Posted by Riviera from Phoenix on 03/16/13 at 11:25 PM ET

Avatar

Guess we’re calling everything now.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 03/16/13 at 11:25 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

That’s right, give them a breakaway just to make it exciting.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/16/13 at 11:25 PM ET

Jeff  OKWingnut's avatar

DET getting a little sloppy

Posted by Jeff OKWingnut from Quest for 12 on 03/16/13 at 11:25 PM ET

NIVO's avatar

way to go Wrongwall!

Posted by NIVO from underpants gnome village on 03/16/13 at 11:25 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Surprised Burro didn’t crack the ice with that fuchin dive.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 03/16/13 at 11:25 PM ET

Hootinani's avatar

I was going to say someone should tell Detroit the PP is over, but apparently they dont agree

Posted by Hootinani on 03/16/13 at 11:26 PM ET

TheRealYooper's avatar

skate to the throat.

Posted by TheRealYooper from within sight of the edge of the Earth. on 03/16/13 at 11:26 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Now is not the time to go all defensive. Keep it in the Vancouver end of the rink.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/16/13 at 11:26 PM ET

calquake's avatar

Wonder if someone will say tomorrow that the Nucks handed the Wings this game?

Posted by calquake on 03/16/13 at 11:26 PM ET

cigar_nurse's avatar

Top of the evening buckos and buckettes. Just caught up on the dvr and lb. Had the outlaws over and finally shooed them away. Too bad we only play these guys 2 times starting next year. Looks like Pavs reads this blog. Jimmah too.

Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 03/16/13 at 11:27 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com