Kukla's Korner

Abel to Yzerman

23’s A Pie In The Sky Summit And Tonite Means Everything

He was a little too tall and he was most definitely wasted.  He could have used a few pounds back then, but he's made up for it in beer weight since the Wings grabbed him in the spring of '97. 

For two years in Toronto, Larry Murphy wasted away in a puddle of his own mediocre feces.  He was jeered because Leaf fans had forgotten by then what a winner looked like. 151 regular season games played in front of the worst fair-weather fans in hockey history. 6 playoff games is what he tallied for Toronto, two of them wins.

Then, with the snap of a finger and a flash of Ilitch cash, he was headed to South Detroit, where the winners live.  

Over the course of the next two playoff years, Larry Murphy played 42 games, winning 32 of them, along with two Cups. He drank beer during press conferences, fed Nick Lidstrom slick little bullets along the blue line and watched as he poured them into net after net. 

Playoff wins, Cups, parades, puppies and hookers. Murph had it all in Detroit. All of it.  And they watched him in Toronto and twisted their little cold, bitter lips into angry, angst-filled grimaces. They watched and watched as year after year the Wings kept coming. Deep runs. Cups. More parades. Swedes in Novi, parties on the river. Fire trucks. Yoohoo. Cheddar. First pitches at Tiger games because that's what winners do.  

And still they watched in Toronto. Coach after coach. Choke after choke. Not even a sniff while the Wings just kept coming.

You think they hate the Wings in St. Louis, in piss-ant Denver? Nashville? You don't know the bitter stench of jealousy until you've been in Toronto in May.

Larry Murphy was a Leaf once, but they dealt him to Detroit and watched him start a dynasty. I have to believe that's a story best untold to the darling little doves come bed time in Ontario.

Naturally, he stayed in Detroit, because winners don't leave the Wings.  He stayed then retired. Took a job babbling between the benches, then the Wings let him go and we know that story, too.  Too many pops, probably. And we dig that. We do.

Now? Murph would probably man the point on our second power play. That's how bad the injuries are. But I won't rehash it. I haven't been here to suffer through it like the rest of you, so I have no right to whine.  I just know what is real.  And what's real is that this team has no business being where they are. This team, should have been eliminated the minute Sochi sunk its Putin-smeared teeth into Hank. 

If Toronto had the injuries Detroit does now? They'd be getting their asses kicked by Bay City John Glenn, instead of clutching the final spot with less than ten left. 

But we're not Toronto.  Tomorrow they'll wake to their 8th straight loss. Us? We'll wake tonite, after too many warm PBRs and a big Wing win, to the sound of thunder.  Southern Michigan summer time is not far off. Puppies, children laughing, green grass and the playoffs await for us? The Leafs?  The chill will remain because baby Jesus likes it that way, and so does Murph.

This might as well be the playoffs. You know it and so do I.  I'm back for this one, and maybe a few more. We'll see.  Whore style. 

It's a Live Blog, bitches. 

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Comments

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dougie's avatar

Curly fries?

Posted by dougie on 03/29/14 at 08:21 PM ET

SK77's avatar

Curly fries?

Posted by dougie on 03/29/14 at 09:21 PM ET

The curliest.

Posted by SK77 on 03/29/14 at 08:21 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Helmer! With the hat-trick! Finishing all nite tonite.

Curly fries foe everyone!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/29/14 at 08:21 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

hope the shoulder is ok ???

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/29/14 at 08:22 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

That Dick should’ve got a boarding call after the goal. Helm has a bad shoulder now and will miss the rest of the season.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/29/14 at 08:22 PM ET

monkey's avatar

CURLY FRIES FOR EVERYONE

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/29/14 at 08:22 PM ET

Gary A$$ SUCK !!'s avatar

I’m okay with Helm…I hope he score the next on!!!

Posted by Gary A$$ SUCK !! from Fort Myers, Florida on 03/29/14 at 08:22 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

who was that that ran Helm after the goal?

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/29/14 at 08:23 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

PP for Detroit

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/29/14 at 08:25 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Two goal lead, Bill.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/29/14 at 08:25 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

What kind of bizarro world are we living in where Darren Helm has more regular season career hat tricks than Pavel Datsyuk?

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 03/29/14 at 08:25 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

I would not mind some oral from that girl behind the Toronto bench.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/29/14 at 08:25 PM ET

SK77's avatar

Good strategy by Toronto—commit a penalty to kill Detroit’s momentum.

Posted by SK77 on 03/29/14 at 08:25 PM ET

Avatar

Not the PP…....NNNNOOOOOO!!!!!

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 03/29/14 at 08:25 PM ET

monkey's avatar

PP for Detroit

Two minutes of suck?

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/29/14 at 08:26 PM ET

Avatar

Better not see any forwards on the point.

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 03/29/14 at 08:26 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Helm was back on the ice, shaking off the boarding.

He’s a keeper.

finish this boyz, ... Skate To The Throat.

L.G.R.W.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/29/14 at 08:26 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Two goal lead, Bill.

Posted by monkey from Finland on 03/29/14 at 09:25 PM ET

Just in case we’re, ya know, not drinking enough as is.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 03/29/14 at 08:26 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Short and curlies, bitches !!

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/29/14 at 08:27 PM ET

SK77's avatar

Columbus gets at least one point—going to overtime with Carolina.

Posted by SK77 on 03/29/14 at 08:28 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

It was Franson that ran Helm after that 3rd goal—- idiot.

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/29/14 at 08:29 PM ET

cigar_nurse's avatar

Anderson not looking very strong on the puck. Maybe out of a job soon.

Fredo must love to play the laffs. Seems to be playing harder.

Posted by cigar_nurse from Greenville South Cakalakee on 03/29/14 at 08:29 PM ET

monkey's avatar

Columbus gets at least one point—going to overtime with Carolina.

We need to win.

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/29/14 at 08:29 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

I’m either going to break out the scotch or the Russian standard right now so i’ll be in a celebratory mood or the suck won’t be as bad.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/29/14 at 08:29 PM ET

WingFanFormerlyInLA's avatar

Interesting, 2nd PP unit was the kid line.

Posted by WingFanFormerlyInLA on 03/29/14 at 08:29 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Did he say a shutdown line with Quincey?

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/29/14 at 08:32 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Nice forecheck shift by the Glendening line.

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 03/29/14 at 08:32 PM ET

SK77's avatar

Columbus wins in overtime—82 points & 7th place in the East.

Posted by SK77 on 03/29/14 at 08:33 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

Two things I never thought I would hear on hockey night in Canada, shutdown line with Quincey, and a Darren Helm hat trick

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/29/14 at 08:34 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

No call? ALF hauled down.

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/29/14 at 08:34 PM ET

SK77's avatar

Weak, Helm. You should have had your 4th goal there.

Posted by SK77 on 03/29/14 at 08:35 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

Two things I never thought I would hear on hockey night in Canada, shutdown line with Quincey, and a Darren Helm hat trick

it is a strange world we live in, aye?

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/29/14 at 08:35 PM ET

monkey's avatar

a Darren Helm hat trick

A hit, an assist, and a breakaway without getting a shot on goal

Posted by monkey from Praha, Česká republika on 03/29/14 at 08:35 PM ET

RWBill's avatar

a Darren Helm hat trick

A hit, an assist, and a breakaway without getting a shot on goal

Posted by monkey from Finland on 03/29/14 at 09:35 PM ET

Too funny and painful.

Posted by RWBill from cruising Brush Street with Super Creepy Rob Lowe. on 03/29/14 at 08:36 PM ET

Avatar

Kronwall…..good Lord

Posted by Valek from Chicago on 03/29/14 at 08:37 PM ET

WestWing's avatar

Wow, Wings almost got Kronwalled

Posted by WestWing from Portland, Oregon on 03/29/14 at 08:37 PM ET

stonehands-78's avatar

big surprise

Posted by stonehands-78 from the beginning ... a WingsFan, on 03/29/14 at 08:37 PM ET

SK77's avatar

HOLY HELL

Posted by SK77 on 03/29/14 at 08:37 PM ET

Bent's avatar

Holy Smith!

Posted by Bent from The U.P. on 03/29/14 at 08:37 PM ET

Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit's avatar

Whoa! Dial 911!

Lets Go Red Wings!!!!!

Posted by Kate from Pa.-made in Detroit on 03/29/14 at 08:38 PM ET

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About Abel to Yzerman

Welcome to Abel to Yzerman, a Red Wing blog since 1977.  No other site on the internet has better-researched, fact-laden and better prepared discussions than A2Y.  Re-phrase: we do little research, find facts and stats highly overrated and claim little to no preparation.  There are 19 readers of A2Y. No more, no less. All of them, except maybe one, are juvenile in nature.  Reminding them of that in the comment section will only encourage them to prove that. Your suggestions and critiques are welcome: wphoulihan@gmail.com